Do not expect others to help you before you are strong.

[Post]

Recently, I chatted with a fellow countryman. He is a typical "Old phoenix man". He is from a rural area and has only been admitted to a famous university, the remaining two brothers and three sisters are working in rural areas at home. Currently, they are in middle age and mixed into the middle-level state-owned enterprises for treatment. For a "Phoenix male" with no background or guidance, it is also a small success. After three rounds of wine, he opened his speech and lamented that his career was not supposed to be so. He looked back on the past and summed up the two factors that led to his career: the great family behind me is dragging down and Its savvy is too low. For the "little phoenix male" who is struggling in the big city of concrete pouring, the senior "Old Phoenix male" also put forward some suggestions based on his own experience. The suggestions are as follows, later in the beginning:

　　"Before you are strong, do not expect others to help you !"

As the saying goes, dogs are not family-poor, and children are not ugly. You cannot choose your origins, but your rural origins are largely deprived of your right to fight for Dad. That is to say, in addition to your own hard work, the family basically cannot help you, and their living environment is doomed to basically no high-quality resources available in the family, even if one day you hear that people who are able to get involved with their relatives are very high in the mouth-watering area, don't take this relatives as an opportunity. He can only count on your luck and others are willing to help you, it only means that you have a good life. Do not be lucky when you take the initiative to help others! Always remember, the only trusted, reliable, and well-known person is you and only you can help yourself!

Extended reading: if you are not good enough, do not show your face to take advantage of it; blindly worship people? Mistakes made by 99% of people

　　"You must have your own circles. While you are alienating others, chances are also alienating you !"

Whether you are introverted or extroverted, whether you are poor or rich, you must have your own circles. This is the birthplace of valuable information and gossip, more reluctant to participate in group activities at night, while you are alienating others, others are also alienating you, your messages are blocked, and opportunities are also fleeting! Therefore, we need to try to integrate into other people's circles, gradually build our own circles, and gradually evolve to a higher-level circle to see more valuable opportunities!

　　"Before the age of 35, don't be infatuated with the increasing number on the bank card every month, don't be a miser, and spend money !"

Children in rural areas are very infatuated with the concept of "ten thousand yuan households". When they become ten thousand yuan households, they dream that they will break through the 100,000 mark on the card one day. When they break through the 100,000 mark, imagining that one day I had to break through millions of things. In fact, these are the sequents left behind by "poor fear", and the bad nature of small farmers has a profound influence. But the dead money on the card is not capital, and the living money that can be spent is capital. How should the money be spent? Learn to manage money, help you grasp the economic situation, have a general picture, and learn to invest in yourself, improve your qualifications and reserve your strength for the future. Learn to pack yourself. It is difficult for a person who is riding a broken bicycle in a tattered manner to sit with a person riding a broken bicycle in a suit car to eat together! Always remember that "one dollar" won't play with "two dollars", and you will learn to spend money on the edge!

Further reading: Investing in yourself is the safest way to manage your finances.

　　"The irregular sending of money to their homes does not bring about any essential changes in their lives. It is not filial piety. The true filial piety is the ability to earn money that will free the elders from worries !"

Old people say "hundred good filial piety is the first". When you work hard at home or even make every effort to support it, you are admitted to a university, set foot on a job, and your registered permanent account is completely non-agricultural, the life of a farmer who has never been moved away from the "face toward the loess" is always done to supplement his family, even if you do not earn much money! In fact, this is a strange sense of the wealth that is "not suffering from poverty but not being balanced" in your small farmer's thinking. The money you give to your family will not bring about any essential changes at all, that's not filial piety, or just a little bit of it. It's almost filial piety! In fact, when you need the most money, you need to pay for social networking and charge your money everywhere. Instead of spending your money on a family that can still afford it, it is better to spend money on the fastest-growing users. This is the real investment!

Additional reading: career growth path: investing time in your future

　　"Before you really have money, never face it, let alone live in others' expectations !"

It is not easy to have a college student in the village. You may be a leader in the village, or you may be in the village, but do not think that others will always pay attention to your life, do not deliberately make yourself like a "Rich Person" for the so-called "Guang Zong Yaozu". Everyone has their own life concerns, except for your parents, others don't have original expectations for you, so there is no need to regard others' views and expectations as your own goal, especially when this expectation can only put pressure on you to make you impetuous. Face is not given by others, but by yourself!

Extended reading: the highest level of interpersonal relationship: not who you know, but who knows you

　　"Always remember: without money, there will be no dignity, but do not worship money and power without ignorance !"

Superficial: Money is one of the signs of success. In a sense, without money, there is no dignity! If you have been poor for more than 20 years, when you have the opportunity to get close contact with money and power, you will have no resistance to these two things and even lose your mind, this is also the main reason why many young people dream about overnight wealth. But always remember the old saying: A gentleman loves his fortune, and he must have reverence for money and power, even if something is lost, it will not come back!

　　"Don't stick to what you need before the age of 35, let alone worry about losing! Except for your indecisive youth, you have nothing to lose !"

You may have achieved a small degree of recognition or achievement through your efforts. However, such recognition and achievement cannot be the final point of your struggle. People cannot live in the past until they are 35 years old, don't stare at what you get, it will make you slowly feel that you cannot afford to lose, in fact, what you value is insignificant for your long journey of life, experience, right, experience is the most important thing for a limited life. If you want to do something, do not be overwhelmed by your current achievements, or hesitate, there is nothing you can call it as a loss except for the young man!

Read more: Write to the confused grass-roots: When do you want to redeem it?

　　"In this information asymmetry society, do not believe in fairness, do not wait for opportunities to favor, and learn to create and strive for opportunities !"

Fairness is just relatively unfair. You did not know what true injustice was born in 1980s, and you do not want fairness. You just want to be in a favorable position in fairness! Nowadays, the social information is becoming more and more asymmetric, and resources are becoming more and more concentrated. In the face of opportunities, everyone is no longer equal, so don't wait for the opportunity to favor, instead of waiting for it, it is better to catch up with it, take the initiative to create and strive for opportunities, do not look at how powerful you are now to find something suitable for you, to say something nice is to do what you want, to say it is not good, to say it is to give up growth, you have to change the way of thinking: check what you want to do, find out what else you want to do, and then quickly add missing capabilities! "Phoenix male" shoulder the family mission of guangzong Yaozu. Apart from yourself, no one has ever deprived you of the opportunity to get ahead !! (Author: Yan yuejian)