Han qiaosheng's Law

Song Shixiong should be at the commanding heights of the sports commentary field. Huang jianxiang worked hard to catch up with his predecessors in the near future.

I found a classic quote from Han and laughed at it. The transcript is as follows:

According to the fans, Han qiaosheng's law was concluded: while explaining the game, Han qiaosheng looked at Player A in his eyes and remembered Player B, talking about PLAYER C in his mouth, actually referring to PLAYER D, the audience thought it was player E. Okay. Start now.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have just passed the Mid-Autumn Festival. I will give you an old age. (It's really late enough)

After this round, the team ranked first in an undefeated position with 6 wins, 3 draws, and 1 score and 21 points. Juventus followed by 22 points. (Where did the "1" go if the old sow does not know the data ?)

I counted the total number of goals and missed goals in the first eight rounds. I was surprised to find that they were just as many. (PU ~~~ What? Do you think it is a coincidence ?)

The team members are as brave and brave as zhao Yun, who stands to be general Changsheng. (Saving lives ~)

Prior to the start of a game, Comrade Han qiaosheng said: "Today, singers from the entertainment industry also came to Xi'an to shout for the Chinese national team," (by mistake, by mistake, "I can't even speak ")

The goalkeeper motioned the game to continue ...... (This is a classic section, which is available in each version)

The ball was blocked by the goalkeeper! (Hind legs ?)

Shanghai Shenhua team shot a shot on the 14th! (Shen si blossomed)

Goalkeeper Angel participated in the World Championship Competition in Mexico this year. (No wonder you are a goalkeeper !)

Because Zhang enhua is not able to adapt to his new position and often cannot find anyone, Fan Zhiyi and Sun jihai often face each other's goalkeeper directly.

(Because the opponent's goalkeeper is iqita)

Sun jihai throws the internal ball (habits and habits)

Both fans enter for warm-up preparation, and the competition is about to begin. (Tens of thousands of people)

I saw AC Milan's batistta break through Marini, and the referee rushed out. (Give me a reason not to kill you first !)

The main floor of Bahrain has a general atmosphere. The surrounding buildings are not very high, and most of them are floors below one floor. (Basement ?)

Four Chinese employees will be in Europe ...... (Of course, he's big. Look at everyone)

In a national team competition, instructor Han said: the peak and Hao Haidong are two kitchen knives of the Chinese Team) (Korean cuisine)

During the 1996 Olympic Games, the Korean big mouth broadcast the diving competition: "the audience now stands on the platform and the British referee !" (What does he do ?)

In a game in Saudi Arabia, instructor Han said: the green hats on the side of the game are Saudi Arabia's head coach. (Poor)

Juventus throw a rugby to Ortega (Ortega, watch out for your head !)

(Volleyball) "... The second pass handed in a rolling ball ......" (Have you ever seen volleyball ?)

In the 95th year of competition for olympic soccer outlinechina vs Saudi Arabia, when the Saudi team's dorsalari joined several people in the Chinese restricted area, Han spoke in amazement and said: "There is no road on the football field, he made a journey with his legs!" (Do not be angry, Mr. Lu Xun)

"Bryant turned around 365 degrees." (how did we see the 5 degrees ?)

"A while ago, especially because of injury, dudeli was unable to play these days, and both of them sat on the sidelines in suits ." When paused, the camera turned to dulley. "Well, some celebrities also come to enjoy the game ......" (Naturally, it's strange)

"Cole is a famous unsung hero of the bulls '"(!)

"Stockton voted 9 in 6 today "(!!)

"The fans are very enthusiastic. They all aim to cheer for the Chicago magic team !" (!!!)

"Kalma longfei grabbed the rebound and sent it to garlipton in the venue" (reminds me of Sakura wood passing the ball to Gao Sha !)

"O'neill scored his 250-kilogram height dunk)

The match was over with a guard from the goalkeeper. (Classic old jokes)

During normal training, the team members must strengthen their physical and adversarial training so that they can adapt to the intensity of the competition. Otherwise, they will hit the game like a tumbler. (Newton, Einstein, Galileo, and you give it to me !)

Suddenly like a spring breeze, Serie A is popular with three backguard .? GT; ___ <)

Foreign players are very dedicated. For example, after a child is born for three months, he plays the game. (Father Hu has no dogs !)

Some viewers may have just opened the elevator and we will report the score again. (Angry! Even if the university elevator does not have the live broadcasting function, protest !)

Ba Qiao rushed into the restricted area with the ball when there was a chaser and there was a interception. (Another classic)

The Crystal Palace team has already played 7 games, with 2 wins, 2 draws, and 4 losses. (It seems familiar)

The two teams compete for me on the court, and the coaches of the two teams are also jealous. (Dependent)

Each inch of turf is under fierce competition. (Biological engineering has no bright future ")

AC Milan is like a computer with a large memory. It is as big as the Pentium generation II, but it is not running fast. It may be infected with a virus. It seems that the coach needs a antivirus hard disk. (I also need one !)

The team member is 1.90 cm tall. (Guinness record !)

Shoot the ball into the door. Let's take a look at the slow action. (It is estimated that there is a problem with his glasses)

The goalkeeper delivers the ball back to the goalkeeper. (Me !)

(Tennis) You see their shorts are very interesting. The shorts of tennis players are special. Oh, they are wearing skirts. (For Me, again, don't help me !)

(Han qiaosheng, a martial arts competition in the Asian Games) When a Chinese athlete appeared, she only saw a gun dance like Yunlong, which was born of tigers and tigers. She remembered Changshan Zhao Zilong and Meng Zhangfei in China's Three Kingdoms era, guan Yu, Guan Yunchang, oh, Guan Yu used a knife (his eyes left the manuscript in his hand and glanced at the stadium) Oh, sorry, she made a stick. (I have been vomiting blood after several years)

(Asian Games ." (Classic in classic)

France scored 14 points in New Zealand at 76-50. (Where is an error ?)

A wedding ceremony was held last week. ("Do not speak ?")

9-27 quotations from the Battle of China and alicloudcli:

The defender team burst into a storm in front of their own door ...... (Self-abuse !)

Ma sude, the defender team, passed the bottom ...... (I have commented twice before)

"Tolicheri cannot play because of injury, and the defensive strength of Milan is greatly reduced ." (At this time, Teacher Zhang huide next to Han pointed out that torricketley is on the court .)

Han qiaosheng said: the director is very special. He captured such a camera in the audience: a man, a woman, a fat man, and a thin man, which is very interesting. (Neurology)

When explaining the Sino-US Women's base competition: "The Rules of the ball-on-hand competition are complicated and difficult to judge if they are not on the scene" (is it better than a ball or a softball ?)

After winning 20th gold medals in China, Han damouth said: "The total number of Chinese gold medals has increased to 20th ". (Traitor !)

(9 sports meeting)

The girl's water stirred up the wild laughter of men in the stands. (Color wolf !)

Ten meters for men and one pair of contestants in Shanghai are very unique. They are 18 and 19 years old, and the other is 13 and 14 years old, very short (not in line with the dual diving pairing principle) This is not funny, the key lies in the explanation. After an action, he said, "Do you think this pair of players is very interesting? They are tall, short, and small. It's strange, it should be said that large players should be physically heavy and should be put into the water first. Why should small players enter the water first ?" The commentator next to him had to explain this: "small players have no power to take off, so it is not as high as a large player. Therefore, they will first enter the water ."

("The body is heavy first into the water", it seems that Galileo's tower test is done in white. Han dazhi is a loyal believer of asistus .)

"This water-entry action reminds me of a Tang poem, with the wind ~~ Sneak into the night and run things ~~ Silent Voice ......" (Five-way projection, no, all projection)

"Beijing contestants Li Na and Wang Rui won the fourth place. The swimsuit they wear today is very nice. However, they can only report the flowers and flowers empty, but they can only report the spring, they laugh in the middle ...... "(Chairman Mao's honorable teachings keep in mind)

"I think if you have twins, you can send them to the Chinese diving team to practice diving.

(TMD)

"The two contestants in Sichuan, one Fang and one Yuanyuan, have a round face and even round eyes ......" (Does Fang's eyes belong to Fang ?)

He shot the ball with the last shot. This is the first 13th touches he scored this season. (Tmmd)

Finally, let's discuss a serious philosophical proposition. First of all, of course, we can't help but mention the greatest commentary since the NBA broadcast in China ――

"Jordan habitually licked his tongue ."

Jordan is a basketball god, I admit. However, God's madness should have a limit. I have never met God. Otherwise, I must ask him to demonstrate what it is like to lick his tongue.