It will save you 20 years of effort!

It's very knowledgeable to talk about the same thing. In the same case, reversing the order, adjusting the tone, or changing the occasion will achieve different results. Next, I will learn the speaking skills together with xiaobian.
1. Praise behavior rather than individual
For example, if the other party is a cook, never say: you are a great cook. He knows that more chefs are better than him. But if you tell him that you will eat in his restaurant for half a week, it will be a great compliment.
2. Praise through third parties
If the other party indirectly hears your praise from others, it will be a little more surprising than you tell me directly. On the contrary, if you criticize the other party, do not tell the Party through the third party to avoid adding vinegar.
3. well-spoken words
It is polite and grateful to you. Someone has done something for you. You just need to say thank you. Sorry, this is bothering you. If you are not easy to learn, please give me more advice. This kind of unemotional phone call can be avoided.
4. Just say thank you for your praise.
When the average person is praised, most of them will be okay! Or with a smile. In this case, it is better to accept and directly say thank you to the other party. Sometimes the other party praises us for our costumes or things. If you say: This is just a bargain! It will make the other party embarrassed.
5. Have the appreciation of competitors
When your opponent or annoying person is praised, don't rush to say: ..., Even if you don't agree with each other, you should say on the surface: Yes, he works very hard. Display your own volume.

6. Criticism depends on the relationship.
Loyal words may not contradict your ears. Even if you are good, the other party may not appreciate your kindness or even misunderstand your kindness. Do not give criticism unless you have a certain degree of friendship or trust with the other party.
7. Criticism can also be pleasant
It is easy to accept the following statement: "about you ..., I have some ideas. Maybe you can hear them ."
8. Time points are important
Never on Monday morning. Most people will suffer from Monday melancholy. In addition, do not take off work before Friday to avoid damaging the weekend vacation mood of the other party.
9. Pay attention to occasions
Do not criticize your friends or colleagues in front of outsiders. It is good to close the door in private.
10. Make suggestions at the same time
In addition to making criticism, you should also provide positive improvement suggestions to make your criticism more convincing.

11. Avoid unnecessary answers
Like: No, it should be ...... It seems that you are looking for something like this. In addition, we often say: I heard that ..., It feels like you have heard the plain text.
12. Don't answer the question.
This is a bad saying. When the other Party hears such a response, it will inevitably think: Do you know what to say? Therefore, we only need to add the following: Yes!
13. Get rid of the useless mantra
Everyone has a habit of speaking, but it is easy to dislike. For example, do you understand what I mean? Do you know? , Basically... Honestly ....
14. Remove unnecessary noises
Some people get used to adding "ah" and other auxiliary words to each sentence, such as "that is to say" and "of course". On formal occasions, they will not seem solemn and sedated.
15. Don't ask the other party what your company is doing
You met someone at an activity. When he introduced himself, he said he was working in a company. Do not ask: What is your company doing? This activity may be held by their company. If you don't know it, you will be embarrassed. Do not say: I heard you have done a good job! This is because the performance of the other party may have dropped by 3 in this quarter. You should say: What is your position in the company? If you do not know the other party's career, don't ask, because he may not have a job.

16. Don't ask people you are not familiar
If you are not satisfied with each other, ask the other party why? Sometimes it is important to ask and explore the meaning of privacy. For example, you should avoid all these problems, such as why you did that and why you made this decision.
17. Don't think everyone knows you
Never say, "Do you still remember me?" when you meet people you have met but never know each other well, you will be embarrassed. The best way is to introduce myself first: "Hello, I am XXX. I am so glad to meet you again ."
18. You can refuse to give up.
If the host recommends you to eat something you don't want, you can say, "Sorry, I can't eat this dish, but I will eat more... "Let the other Party feel that you really like and thank the food they prepared. If you are full, you can say: "These dishes are delicious. If you are not full, you really want to eat more ."
19. Do not show yourself better than the other party
During a social conversation, if someone says that he just went to New York for a week, don't say that the last time you went to New York for a month, this will undermine the interest of the other party. It is better to share your feelings and preferences for New York with others.
20. Do not correct others' mistakes
Do not correct others' pronunciation, grammar, or facts too much. It will not only make the other Party feel embarrassed, but also make you very fond of performance.

21. Do not pretend to understand
If you don't know the theme of the conversation, you can honestly say, "I don't know this ." And others will not continue to embarrass you. If you do not understand it, you need to understand it. It is easier to say the wrong thing.
22. Master the 1-Second Principle
When you listen to other people's conversations, pause for 1 second before answering the questions, which means you are listening carefully. If you reply immediately, you may feel that you have been waiting to interrupt each other at any time.
23. I heard nothing
When you listen to someone, you hear only what the other person knows and is willing to tell you. In addition to listening, we must also observe. How is his behavior? What job does it do? How to allocate time and money.
24. Choose a proper time
When you have something to discuss with a colleague or supervisor, you should choose the right time based on the importance of your problem. If it is a personal task, do not disturb him when he is immersed in thinking. If you do not know when the recipient is free, you may write to him first.
25. Smile and refuse to answer private questions
If you are asked a personal question you don't want to answer or a question that makes you uncomfortable, you can smile and say, "I can't answer this question ." It will not embarrass the other party, but also hold your bottom line.

26. Turning back
Drinking is unavoidable in many social scenarios. Don't just say, "I don't drink ." Let's take a look. It's better to say humorously: "I'm good at pouring wine for everyone ."
27. Report your name first
If you forget the name of the other party, it is regarded as a formal occasion to introduce your name to the other party or take out a business card. The other party will also report its name and business card, this eliminates the trouble of not naming the other party's name.
28. Improper gossip sound box when a group of people talk about gossip or rumors of someone, do not casually echo it, because as long as you say it, it will surely be passed to the client. The best way is not to express your position. Just say, "I am not sure about what you are talking about ."
29. Deliver customer orders
If you think that the time is about to end the conversation or deliver the guests, but the other party does not seem to have to get up and leave, you can say: "Sorry, I have to make a call. It may take a while ...", Or, "Thank you very much for coming ...". You can also look at your watch inadvertently to let the other party know that it is time to go.
30. Make the other party think that he is very important
If you ask for help from your predecessors, you can say: "I want to discuss with you because I trust you very much ..." Make the other Party feel highly respected.

31. directly describe the status quo
If you have different opinions from your subordinates, do not criticize them directly, but describe the differences.
32. Seek Solutions
If the subordinate is not performing well, ask him how to solve the problem and do not take a threat attitude.
33. Provide assistance
If you cannot solve the problem of subordinates for a while, don't say "don't bother me in advance," but tell him that I know who can help me!
34. Speak in equal tone
The supervisor should not say, "I have more than a decade of experience. It's right to listen to me ." A good saying is: "I have used this method and it is very effective. Do you want to try it ?"
35. flexibly accept comments from subordinates
Even if you have a definite idea, do not say to the subordinates: "These suggestions have been taken into consideration and you don't have to say more .」 I should give my subordinates a chance to say to him, "I already have a case, but I still want to hear from you ."

Chen anzhi once said that about 15% of a person's success depends on knowledge and skills, and 85% on communication-the ability to express his own opinions and inspire others' enthusiasm. Indeed, people who are good at communication are often respectable, loved, and supported.

Source, life sentiment: http://www.cnblogs.com/juznl/