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21 June: as a child, you may have heard "this child is very clever, is the study not attentively, if he earnest, the study achievement certainly is good." "This sentence?" Did you say that to you or to the people around you? Many people feel that this is a compliment, but in fact, to the child such an idea, in fact, is to harm the child. Smart people, often have not learned to face their own efforts and others to pay, it has been like the lightness of winning posture. In order to look good, they would rather lose, do not want to win through efforts.
Source: Sing no Smell (zhongquwuwen)
8:48 A lot of people have been this sentence for a lifetime from the 21st century Economic Report
Special thanks to this issue of host: Strawberry mushroom sauce
Yesterday and a bunch of friends to dinner, suddenly received a student's parents telephone.
learned that the end of the semester exam will be re-class, she is afraid of the son can not be a good class, anxious to find me to discuss countermeasures, ask the child's learning situation. Before that, she had always thought that high school would have to read a senior grade before a penny.
Feel her 1:30 will not be able to stop, I deliberately out of the box and she talk on the phone, and as far as possible objectively to evaluate her children, let her know the children in school performance, I hope she can be properly urged.
But, I say a word, she is to contradict me, finally very impatient to say: "You this teacher really does not level, I think my child needs encouragement, the former class teacher all said he is very clever, is not good studious, if he seriously study, the result is certainly good." "
"This child is very clever, is the study not attentively, if he earnest, the study achievement certainly is good." ”
This sentence is comparable to "I just do not want to lose weight, otherwise long thin", every end of the final exam, will be frequently poured into some parents ears, seemingly perfunctory, but let parents are very useful, listen to them usually have two kinds of feeling:
My children are smarter than the other children, especially the hard-working ones, and my family's children are a little bit harder, and they will certainly be able to go beyond those who die and learn quickly.
But parents are not alert, this sentence is to harm their children. It will give the child a wrong understanding: smarter than diligent senior, IQ than hard, "smart" is an important advantage, "not intentions" is a secondary disadvantage.
Long-term evaluation as "very smart, not intentions" of the child, it is easy to grow "performance-type personality", need to live in the praise of others, never refused to do their utmost.
Their grades are usually not bad, but they can't be at the top and look down on the students who are studying day and night.
Their mentality is, I have not done my best, I can throw them far away.
The truth is, they will never do their best, they need to maintain their "learning not intentions, but still good results" status quo.
Korea MBC has an anniversary act play called "Plop plop Love", Heroine Dunphy is a self, incompetent and ignorant, daily muddle through the three students, early on to give up learning maths.
On the day of the college entrance examination, Dan can not bear the weight of the funk, but unexpectedly through the Korean era, and the King of the World Sejong developed a romantic romance.
The play in the watercress won praise, not the play itself is how good-looking, but it is facing the choice and test of the people, create a can escape the reality of the dream.
Why are we so afraid of the test? Why do most of us first think of failure, not success, facing the test? Why do we often prefer to run away and try something new?
In the play, Dunphy answered a lot of people's voice: I have not tried desperately to live, I am afraid if all efforts or not, then that look will be very difficult to see.
After a long period of observation, I found that "very smart, not heart" students, there are some fatal weaknesses.
Their attention is not focused, especially vulnerable to external interference, learning stamina is not enough, continuous learning time is short, learning initiative is poor, always want to trickery and refused to do a solid basic training.
Some students also respond quickly, think very smart, in class when a listen to understand, thought content is very simple, then no longer concentrate on listening, and when the teacher talked about the key place, his thoughts broke down, did not hear. The teacher can not every time for these students to repeat, time, they found not understand, but refused to admit that they do not understand.
Smart people, often have not learned to face their own efforts and others to pay, it has been like the lightness of winning posture. In order to look good, they would rather lose, do not want to win through efforts.
We grow up with the encouragement of "cleverness", and the best compliment we can think of is also smart. Seemingly encouraging efforts, but actually advocating genes.
Film and television drama, truancy, fights, girls Jiang, Ke Jingteng, Xu Taiyu, Gao Xiang, the sun is handsome is not love to learn, they are very smart, casually learning on the counter attack.
So in real life, can you find examples?
Three years, the school around the internet cafes popular playing DotA, I also followed several friends to several times, deep in them. And the real DotA master, I only serve Sandysandr.
"You're not going to be so simple?" This function changes a bit, right, it is natural to think of the formula, take it into the solution is not good? ”
"Can it all die?" Others 8 level Two even 560 points of blood, you 500 blood even if you take off the Magic anti also will point you a bit of things, you can not go to eat a tree first? ”
Sandysandr know 200 kinds of mathematical problems of the answer skills, can remember the 500 poetry appreciation of the answer to the question, but also clear 1000 kinds of heroic skills to match the effect.
We are not convinced, why he can not study hard, he passed the country's top ten universities? It was only when we were going to slice his brain that he told the truth.
Every semester, he will love to read the new textbooks in one weeks. Walking on the way home, because I saw the leaves falling and wanted to build a motion trajectory function and hit a tree. The first contact with atomic theory, for several days to sleep, thinking about the magic of the micro-world.
He did not listen in class, just because the teacher said those points, long ago in various information books have seen. Not only have seen, and most after a thorough thinking and understanding, can not understand the place, directly to ask the teacher, sometimes will be in the name of the super-class dismissed.
Sandysandr said: "For me, knowledge itself is a happy thing, so I never feel hard, naturally no one think I am diligent." In most people's eyes, diligence is about forcing yourself to do something you don't want to do. ”
There is no shortage of intelligent people in this age, but not many people with intentions.
I have seen a lot of clever children, in primary school grades, after the high school began to decline, a lot of reasons, the teacher's parents wrong praise way, their own efforts are closely related to the degree.
We tend to boast a person's intelligence, but do not realize that sometimes focus, earnest, diligence these qualities, is the decisive factor to do things well.
Of course, when we affirm the importance of diligence, we should also avoid entering another misunderstanding, because:
True diligence is not forced mechanical repetition, nor self-moving destruction of health, nor the last-minute efficiency outbreak caused by procrastination.
True diligence comes from the depths of a person's heart, and for those who cannot get instant returns, they remain enthusiastic and focused for 10 of years.
Introduction to the current issue of anchors
strawberry mushroom sauce loves music, love sound. Want to use a smile to greet the first ray of sunshine, want to use sound to convey the positive energy of life. I'm glad to meet you! Weibo:quellazhong
21 June Small Partners, "the child is very clever, is not learning attentively, if he is serious, academic performance is certainly good." "Have you heard that?" he said. What do you think of this statement?
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- once the most love of learning is definitely hard, it is necessary to work hard, so-called those who praise the child is very clever is not learning the words, is a comfort of their own!
July 26
- do not read not love pay and harvest although in direct proportion, but is not a straight line, but the parabola. A person's time spent in interest, not a minute is wasted.
July 26
- Take a bubble , be smart, and be smart.
July 26
- There is no such thing as a drift . Attention concentration is also the embodiment of learning ability.
July 26
- Yin Lihong Such a parent too much, really hurt their children.
July 26
- Mary Lin grabs the couch
July 26
- I ' m a slash every night to see the 21st century report of the night read, the views of the bright new, very like, for the reader to dedicate a small part of the nutritional feast to praise.
July 26
The author replies to remember every day to interact with small series Oh ~July 26
- you're talking about my primary school?
July 26
- Quiet month to any one thing curiosity and love, is to promote their continuous research and study of the power ah ... No matter what you do, there is no sense of identity in your heart, and doing it is weak. Deep experience.
July 26
- Song Jack is smarter than effort, or you're not admitting that genes are more important than man-made.
July 26
Author replyJuly 26
- zxy generally do not like to watch chicken soup, but small series of recent articles are love to see! Useful, I agree with the point of view! Thank you!
July 26
Author replyJuly 26
- Wang Kai people 8 level 2 Even note is a single, rhythm brought up, and you haven't reached 6.
July 26
Author replyJuly 26
- originally originally of Ben suddenly thought of elementary school hou Study of Chinese lesson "injury Zhongyong"!
July 26
- Seabuckthorn must strive, but also have talent.
July 26
- There is no shortage of intelligent people in the world, but the lack of a down-to-earth person. Parents need to evaluate their children objectively, as children, also need to accurately position themselves, not because of external factors and blurred their direction of progress
July 26
- the more effort, the luckier! sometimes praise may not be your real strength. Accustomed to hear good praise, slowly will be believed! Good words frankness is conducive to the line, learn to face the smart you, not lazy excuses! Happy and diligent effort!
July 26
- ?? Sugar said very reasonable, smart is important, and the efforts and hard work is more important, I would rather be a stupid bird, clumsy birds have.
July 26
- Heng Sister Focus is really important, a lot of students are very smart, but smart not necessarily have achievements, because will be focused on the curiosity of hard-working people to replace, so smart and not focus on the person will probably later become ordinary people.
July 26
- Elron Yiu Rong My mother gave me the definition of diligence is that every moment is learning, that is called diligence, that is the effort. Later I found that this does not work, no thinking of diligence is just a waste of time and energy, and usually such 10 years as a day of diligent results have hysteresis, this is a need to be patient!
July 26
The author responds to the thinking study, is the useful, the deep study ~July 26
- Cinder character is not born, fate is also a destiny, do not blind efforts, advocating what struggle, is to disturb the order, your struggle really so meaningful hmm
July 26
Author replyJuly 26
- No language was the middle school teacher pit
July 26
- Self -deception is just ...
July 26
- House Joju When natural " sometimes family education is very important, a person's character in addition to their own, more important is the impact of home family tradition. As long as the side of the matter carefully done, how not to make big things.
July 26
- Dust I feel very sensible, sometimes not to do is to give their own failure and not as an excuse. Now 30, decided to start from the beginning. Come on!
July 26
The author reply refueling, Bang Bang ~!July 26
- Rothing , it's me.
July 26
- true teachers should not simply blame the parents, some teachers only admit that the subject does not recognize the overall education, only teach not educating people, only the sterile, ears period of plasticity, teachers can not encourage a few words, can not be patient student performance of repeated fluctuations?
July 26
The author replies So the hardest thing is to pinch this "degree" Oh ~July 26
- I'm the one who doesn't love sugar sugar. I'm changing!
July 26
- When did the Li Zhi start the night reading? It's a little interesting!
July 26
The author's reply began a long time, oh ~ every night, welcome to continue to pay attention to ~July 26
- The Golden City analysis makes sense
July 26
- east to west to encourage the manufacture of genius smart bad???
July 26
The author replies to suggestions read the full text Oh ~July 26
- a credit Zeng Lipo 13983193673 A lot of people think this article proves that smart is wrong to be clever, but in fact it is too superficial. There is a theorem many people may not know: People tend to lose in the advantages, rather than defeat in the disadvantage! The conscientious can understand carefully. Think of the production of Kodak film, think of the former mobile phone boss Nokia.
July 27
- Joyce???? Many people think that learning is a good IQ, but I think a lot of people who learn good, or the ability to learn a strong person is the emotional quotient high. They are good at observing, summing up, sinking in the gas, quiet down the heart.
July 26
- Zhao Big Baby suffered from the harm
July 26
- Well chestnut is a good way to focus, immerse, and achieve results with heart.
July 26
- CT is always the same, leading to an almost critical moment.
July 26
- Xu Blue Sky can say, generally I so praise the children of other families. Unexpectedly this sentence poisoned so deep, it seems that after a little bit of speech, even with the intention of encouraging others.
July 26
- Orangejunwa Heart, focus, you are exceptionally glorious.
July 26
- Roll cake Go One, the enemy will be the first to win, Blink one's own generals reckless second, the enemy will be more than the opponent, the wrong to downgrade their own advisers, the weather forecast error three, the enemy will often win, blink the enemy generals foolhardy
July 26
- Stealth Zombie- only to find that I also have to listen to this sentence and strive to maintain the state of learning Dabbler
July 27
- Pure (farmer) success =1% Smart +99% efforts, because the knowledge skills are not innate, but the day after tomorrow to learn to obtain.
July 26
- Doria too much empathy.
July 27
- ?? Shun Kang back to the original point of the matter, only love and obsession is the greatest motivation.
July 27
- Ningshi in real life, people's success often depends more on their non-intelligence factors than on intelligence factors, that is, EQ rather than IQ. Therefore, we should pay more attention to cultivate children's good character.
July 27
- Cloud Light Breeze This is a manifestation of hypocrisy and a part of our culture. Think about the "kingdoms" ... Schizophrenia! Mr. Lu Xun hit the key. Pragmatic, pragmatic, and pragmatic! It is fundamental to both the individual and the country.
July 27
- Shen Ye "Biscuit Broken" focus, heart feel, adhere to is a person's most basic learning and work attitude, is the basis ~
July 27
- Ray? I'm going to make the headlines!
July 27
Author replyJuly 27
- towness Night reading this way is good
July 27
- ヾ (??? ヾ ^ Meng I remember before I read a sentence: Others say you are not good must listen to change, others praise you listen to the end of the _ (: З"∠) _
July 28
- Shao A familiar word, in the future to put it in a cage
July 28
- The memory fragment reminds me of the university hang Ke this matter, now feels that is the attitude question, is not the ability question, has nothing to do with the intelligence.
July 27
- Wu Xiaoxiang can not more agree ah, don't choke them, still fall a can't talk. Let those self-righteous people continue to be self-righteous, the society is accustomed to who ah, sooner or later the consequences of eating
July 27
- Lt 's a statement that parents say is a cover-up, others say is perfunctory.
July 27
- Next Stop the sky?? Yes, you can give yourself a wake-up call, they are parents in the eyes of children! No longer give yourself water at the same time! Also remind yourself to be responsible for your next generation! Night reading really makes people feel warm, and positive energy
July 28
- Next Stop the sky?? I feel like myself! This is the best excuse that I have not tried to do. This sentence in the heart to have a reasonable escape rule! When it is not too late to see here, can heart to educate their next generation, smart still more to do their best, so he will play their own excellence! Thank you
July 28
Author reply when think late, actually not late ~July 28
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