Classic humorous text message

Classic humorous text message

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I am so tired that I can't stop changing positions. After I finish changing the front position and the back position, I can't go to bed. After the shooting, you will be intoxicated with my collapse. I will talk about it again. Alas, I am so tired of playing football!

If you have money, I 'd rather make a mistake.

Drinking is basically dependent on delivery, smoking is basically dependent on supply, wages are basically not moving, basically no wife.

Holding the girl's hand, I regret that I didn't start early. Holding the wife's hand is like holding the right hand on the left, and I don't feel at all.

American visit in China: Your building is too low! This building should be at least ten times larger in the United States! Chinese tour guide: Yes! This is a crazy people's house. Of course it's not big!

Young girls are very valuable, and the prices of young women are higher. If there are rich women, both of them can be discarded.

American taxi in China: Your car is really slow! We are much faster! The result is to the destination. The fee is 50 RMB! So expensive! A: The price calculator is for American products!

Men 20 are futures, 30 are spot, 40 are pretty goods, 50 are jumping from the building, 60 is oh

Treat a lover as warm as spring, treat the opposite sex as hot as summer, treat the enemy as cruel as winter.

One lover is not a waste, two three or four are figures, and five or six are not enough animals!

The kiddies want to break, the girl wants to waves, the more the better, the more the waves get better.

When books are used, they hate less, and the money is not enough by the end of the month.

Wife: You used to send me roses. Why don't you send me roses? Husband: Have you ever seen a fisherman feed it after catching a fish?

If you say that you are a tree, then I am a vine, and I walk around you! You say you are a fish, then I am a basin of water, I soak you!

I want to use Cupid's arrow to hit you and cut you down with a love knife!

If you have heard of flowers fragrant, do not ask who the flowers are red, love informed heavy, drunk know wine thick, flowers bloom to thank the end, fate does not stop, like spring breeze to go again, women are like flowers and dreams.

All the wages are handed in, including unplanned ones; all the leftovers are contracted, including renewed ones; all the housework is done, including the mother-in-law's house; every day the thoughts are reported, including a flash.

Father: "Son, what would you say if I eat as dirty hands as you do ?" "I should be polite and never say anything ."

Touching me is your name; attracting me is yours; surrounding me is your silver; dragging me around is your finger; close to me is your body; binding me is our child!

Gently I walked away, just as I gently came. I packed all my sacks and took away a lot of cabbage.

A group of pupils; a group of middle school students; a pair of college students.

Chinese soccer matches and football history changes. Comrade Milu shows his face and fans across the country are shocked.

Four major tragedies of the person's life: people go to work, there is no need to get laid off, and their wives are soaked up. Eating Viagra does not work.

Diamond ring, yours. Flowers, yours. Car, yours. House, yours. You, mine!

You are my dog slaves. You look like a freak, and you want to carry your feet at first glance.

This year's New Year's Day does not receive gifts, but only RMB!

On Sunday morning, the old man who picked up the broken lines lined up. The captain directed him and rushed to the garbage. The waste of paper in the garbage was everywhere.

My mom and I are killing myself. Your mom killed me first and then killed me. Your mom died and I went home.

The name of the person I love has the Lord, and the person who loves me is terrible!

When you see the blessing I sent to you, please try to hit the wall and see no. the countless stars in front of you are my infinite blessing. Wish you a happy New Year! Send

Dear, get up and charge now !! The police station is checking the number !!!!

Don't look down, look angry again, really don't look at it, look at it again, you stupid pig!

When the sun comes out, you climb the pole, climb to the Pole, and you step on the wire, accidentally stepping on the high voltage, you are black smoke!

Last night, suddenly caught a cold, your message, received it, my girlfriend looked at it, went crazy, got me right away, deleted it, I want to let you go, let your boy not tune it!

One day when I went to the streets, I saw a large group of people gathering on the street. I was so curious that I would join in and ask. A big uncle turned back and told me, "You see, a pig is reading Short Messages !"

The mountains are not piled up, the trains are not pushed, the positive is not the reminder, And the cowhide is yours !!!

China East unbeaten and sunflower collections. If you are not in the palace, you cannot succeed. If you are in the palace, you may not succeed. If you are already in the palace, enter the palace.

Titanic missed the wheel and the Concord plane failed to catch up. Dear one, how lucky I am to sing.

The earth will change, people will change, and love you forever. It is impossible to marry you!

If it is a "Star", it will catch you! If it's a comet waiting for you! If it is a "Meteor", you are too lazy to care about it !~!

After crawling for more than a year, the little ant climbed to the elephant's ear and said a word, the elephant "throttled" and fell onto the ground-the ant said, "I have it-it's yours !"

Female: Now, do you want to say no! Male: you said no, stop, no!

Why has the second world war of Japan no longer seen an anjul? Because they have set up the "self-defense force "!!

In 1980s, my wife-you cannot cheat. in 1990s, my wife-you cannot ride. In the new century, my wife-you're welcome.

A nun went to the hospital for B-ultrasound, and the careless nurse gave a pregnant woman a ticket. After seeing it, nangu sighed and said, "This year, I cannot even trust carrots ."

Hungry, I cannot resist your temptation to get in touch with you. I have a burst of unspeakable pleasure. I really want to have a big fight with you, and I am afraid that I will have a big belly, ah, dear beer.

Big Apple with red flowers and green leaves, I don't want to die for a few days; you are a lamp in the past, illuminating the rest of my life.

Ugly man looked back, scared to death by the river a ox; ugly man 2 back, Daqing Oilfield does not produce oil; ugly man 3 back, Jordan to play table tennis; ugly man 4 back, Monk shampoo with rejoice.

It's just a gust of wind, it's just so eternal; it's just a dream, it's just so real; you bow your head, but I can't calm down. Your fart is so bad

James went to the beach and shouted, "the sea! Mother! The voice just fell into his face. He is furious: depend! It's TM stepmother!

When a village lady raises a basket of eggs and meets a few big men, she redirects her round *. The peasant girl gets up and slapped the dust: How big is it? I thought it was just about to grab the eggs!

You owe me a hug to read this message; delete this message, owe me a kiss; save this message, owe me a appointment; if you reply, you owe me all; if you want to reply, you will be mine.

After watching the Chinese team, the World Driver Association issued a call to the Chinese team to learn from the Chinese team.

The above is Mao, the below is Mao, and the night is Mao. One Organ of the human body. Don't worry, friends, eyes.

The word "component" in an auto parts factory is replaced by "Ox". An old man pulls a ox and mutates in his mouth: "car matching ox, at least a tractor should be generated ."

As the Chinese team participated in this World Cup, the following ball watching tools should be prepared: one mask to avoid being smoked by the foot of the national football team; 10 empty wine bottles,
Use the client to go downstairs

Now in Beijing, Gwangju enjoys ample logistics in addition to Costa Rica. When the award rate is full, Brazil is exhausted, Turkey is swept across, Tokyo is supported, and the Hercules cup is won.

My feelings for you can no longer be suppressed. When my parents are absent tonight, I will bring you to my room, turn off the light, and pull you into my bed ...... My parents' watch is beautiful!

When you catch thieves, you have recovered the losses. When you catch your girlfriend, you have just begun to lose !!!

Emergency reminder: we are afraid of strong winds recently. We must carry two 10-kilogram dumbbells with us when we leave the house to avoid being swept away by the storm. The weight must be doubled if the weight is less than 50 kilograms.

Why is it so dark? Why are the cows flying on the sky? Why are the cows flying on the ground.