Confrontation, starting from criticism

Many people like to criticize others. When they see other people's problems, there is an impulse to come up with them. They lack a certain degree of tolerance. But they do not know that they have set up their own opposites in the Process of criticism.

Critical psychology is a kind of thinking model that destroys the relationship between people.

Criticism comes from the perfect pursuit of results by the author, who is generally a perfectionist. There is nothing wrong with the pursuit of perfection. The problem is that excessive pursuit of perfection will only result in defects. What others do will never meet his expectations or meet his requirements. From another perspective, the reviewers do not criticize each other completely for the purpose of cracking down on the other party, and some do so to motivate the other party to make more efforts. However, such criticism may result in the psychological frustration of the other party, in the end, I gave up my efforts and pursuit of perfection, which lost my original intention. Measures that make the final result impossible are measures that fail.

Some managers like to say, "How can you .....? "This is a typical mindset dominated by critical psychology.

Think about it. What do you first think of when your subordinates hand in their work answers? Many people are looking for something wrong with this job. Then Zhang Kou asked, "How can you do this? "

Out of such a critical mentality, it is easy for managers to make excessive behavior choices, which has some adverse effects on their work.

The first is to influence the relationship between managers and subordinates, which is obvious. Managers use criticism, irony, or even abuse their subordinates. subordinates think that managers lack minimum respect for themselves. Subordinates treat their superiors as enemies, and the two are the opposite sides. Even if the manager is sometimes out of the intention that hengtie cannot become a steel company, the manager is strict with his subordinates, but his subordinates may not necessarily accept the situation. In constant denial, the idea of "I am not even as good as a dog in the eyes of my boss" is quite normal. With this understanding, how can there be a good relationship between the two.

The Critical psychology will allow managers to only see the shortcomings of their subordinates and fail to discover their advantages. Under the guidance of Critical psychology, managers will focus on finding errors first. There is nothing else in the eyes of managers, but they just try their best to find out what is wrong. The error is full of eyes, and it is too late to get angry, so you have the idea to see what is worthy of praise. As a result, subordinates have become people with thousands of shortcomings.

It is actually very easy to change the psychology of criticism, that is, do not let criticism appear before praise. Before speaking, find out what is worthy of praise. The previous job can only score 60 points, even if it can only score 61 points this time, the progress of this point is also worthy of praise. If you make a mistake first, you must criticize it first. If you first find a good place, those commendable places, this will change the focus of attention, and you will only see the shortcomings but not the advantages. Learn to put "how can you ....? "Can we change to" this way ". These are two attitudes: the former is forced and the latter is compressed, which can easily cause resistance to subordinates. The latter first affirmed its subordinates, and then looked for a better way to make them more acceptable.

If the work is to achieve the result, it does not make much sense for the manager to find the place where the subordinates are wrong. The key is to correct the mistakes. There is no need to criticize anyone. What managers need to do is to find methods and ways to achieve the results.

There is a kind of Psychology in which people like to make friends with people who all like themselves. People don't look for people who don't like themselves as friends.

This digest is written in "management creates life".