I am a little too sentimental about life _ life

In the new post has been nearly two years, and their own state is not very satisfied with, although the work is stable, not busy, so pay less also recognized, who let himself not pay so much, but this is not what I want to live, I want to busy, want to earn some money, want to try to balance the rhythm of a good life. is not I pursue a little more. In the unit feeling leadership is not very like themselves, may be because of the personality of more introverted, poor expression, coupled with their original work for several years of programmers, to form a meticulous job, but also poor laughs habits. But now the job involves a lot of factors, want to work better in the future, there must be a good relationship with direct leadership, but some of their own efforts are not to see, Ah, hate their own state of work, I want to have to do their best to work, to live, as far as possible to do without a little regret, Although this is an ideal state, but hope that they do not too big gap, but now a bit like boiling water in the frog, very worried about their future, afraid of 40 years old or mediocre, I will feel wasted life. What I do now is only cherish not many opportunities, is oneself can control own life, live with the sex some, enrich some, so much.