Methods for building interpersonal trust

Almost all jobs in the world require cooperation between people, institutions, and institutions. Trust is the foundation of cooperation. mutual trust and exchange can take effect without any effort. When we expand our influence and inspire others to gain our own voices, our interpersonal communication enters a new realm, and we also need to develop and establish skills to consolidate interpersonal relationships, first, you need to gain the trust of others.

How to obtain others' trust? The trust between people is established through emotional savings, and the trust between organizations is achieved by people. The emotional reserve needs to be active and sustained, and some personal sacrifices are required.

(A) Try to understand others

Understanding Others refers to understanding the real needs of others and taking the right action. What if a person like pears and you give him an apple?

(B) make and keep promises

It is easy for adults and children to trust their promises, especially when they are eager. However, it is very difficult to achieve the promise. Once the trust is broken, even if they can understand it rationally, they are emotionally unacceptable. Therefore, we should minimize the "commitment" in our lives. once promised, we should be fully prepared to achieve it at any cost. When the commitment cannot be fulfilled, we will temporarily bear the consequences of reducing trust, and then try to restore and re-build trust.

(C) honesty and openness

Anyone can conceal their mistakes to avoid embarrassment. If you are honest and upright, you can establish an unusual trust relationship with others. Honesty is also a kind of self-unity, which enables people to gain a kind of inner peace, so as to be mentally healthy and gain good interpersonal relationships. Lying means throwing the problem to the future, while being honest means leaving the problem to the past.

(C) Good and polite

People are emotional animals and they all need to be respected and recognized. Small courtesy and good faith sometimes bring huge dividends. True courtesy, kindness, and respect come from a person's deep nature. In most cases, courtesy people can get what they want. Of course, if a person is deliberately performing, people may not necessarily buy such superficial accounts, and people can identify the tricks they want to manipulate others. If you want your children to have a good social relationship, ask them "please", "thank you", and "Do you need help ".

(E) Win-Win or non-transactional thinking

The greatest potential strength of this kind of thinking is to take into account the needs and feelings of both parties. We are willing to make personal sacrifices and put down the personal interests first, so as to better understand the urgent needs of the other party and the reasons behind them, in this way, better collaboration and negotiation can take into account the best interests of both parties. A win-win situation means that each party obtains things that he thinks are valuable, things that each party has different opinions on their values (things that have value for one party, and things that have little value for the other party ). If you give up what you think is less valuable, and what gets more value is a win-win situation-expanding the overall benefits.

(F) Clear Expectations

Communication between people is based on mutual expectations and needs. It is critical to understand your own expectations and needs, express your expectations clearly, and understand others' expectations. Almost all the root causes of communication interruptions, disconnections, or poor atmosphere are unclear expectations of participating roles and final goals. Therefore, in social networking, we should focus on "clarifying our roles and expectations, collecting feedback", and "understanding others' expectations and goals, and giving feedback ". "Non-violent communication" is a great achievement in this regard.

(G) keep loyal when the other party is not present

When the other party is not present, being loyal is always the same to the people. It is the most difficult to achieve emotional savings. For example, when someone is not present, many others may say three things to them as if they were instinct. If you do not criticize others or maintain others' reputation, you will show your loyalty, others will also admire and respect you (whether or not they agree with your practice), because they know that they will cherish their reputation when they are not present. Whether people are not the embodiment of literacy, maintaining others is also an extraordinary way of emotional investment.

(H) apologize in a timely and sincere manner

It is the most effective way to make an apology to get an emotional savings only when you apologize early, be sincere, and use your own actions to express your regret for causing inconvenience or injury to others. Do not let your apologies evolve into your own defenses and complaints, and assume the part of your responsibilities (even if you have more responsibilities ). Apology is also a learning. what we talked about in the last interview was that we were indeed at fault and did not have the attitude we should have at that time, all of which were based on our explicit understanding of responsibility sharing. When the responsibility is not clear, an easy apology may bring you into a quagmire. It is necessary to clarify the scope of the responsibility first.

(I) Give and accept feedback

Putting forward negative feedback is the most difficult and necessary in the entire communication activity. Many people have blind spots without self-knowledge, because no one gives them feedback. People love their faces. It is a good way to give feedback in private, so as to avoid a wide audience. A good way to give feedback is to express your feelings, worries, opinions on things, or euphemistically point out the specific mistakes of the other party and guide him to perceive his own shortcomings, rather than judging or accusing the other party, especially not being able to launch personal attacks or tag. When giving feedback to others, you must clearly and clearly indicate what you want to express. In general, this private and euphemistic approach will appreciate your thoughtfulness and sincerity even if others do not accept it. To yourself, of course, you must listen carefully to others' feedback on yourself. It is best to take the initiative to seek others' feedback and find your own blind spots. If there is formal job handling feedback in the organization, a clear positive response should be made, no matter how harsh it is.

(J) forgiveness and forgiveness

Everyone makes mistakes, so we need to forgive others and be forgiven by others. You can just laugh at it without thinking about it. Everyone should have their own bottom line. When someone tries to break your bottom line maliciously, they don't have to tolerate it and immediately knock it down.

Finally, trust is an interactive relationship. to gain the trust of others, trust others first. Trust can provide people with faith and vision. We should develop the habit of affirming others, affirming others' potential, clearly informing them of value and potential, and stimulating their enthusiasm is active trust. Goethe said, "If you treat a person as what he can and should be, he will be called that way." That is, "What do you believe in others, what will it look like ". Trust needs to be honed by practice, and may face disappointment and risk. This risk is worth it, because what you give to others and yourself is invaluable.