Singles Day, how to rationally talk about "graduate single problem"?

should be an auspicious moment   

for the vast majority of people, today is a "chop hands" of the day, 0 points after the crazy Rob is a variety of off-the-list plan.  for the author, in fact, today is a very ordinary day, in-situ tensile test, and then the gleeble of the sample back to continue to grind the metallographic, hit the hardness ... until back to the laboratory, heard the sister-in-waiting shouted "Just wait for you!" Come on, let's grab a seat with a couple! "  So, our "uncle and aunt" so mighty kill to five crossing the most romantic restaurant, and those into a double into the celebration of the "Light Mixing festival" of small couples to spend a collective life together.   At this moment, in this "Royal Park Haze" of the night, many couples and suspected couples are in every corner of the city "Wave", as a doctoral student I have to think of the situation of our group of people. Whether it is a brother who just got a certificate, or a long-distance love of the younger brother, also or every week regularly spit groove Blind Date experience of the elder sister, graduate student's emotional life and marriage problems appear to be so a bit special.   

Or perhaps, in this "auspicious", to say that our group of people, only to appear exceptionally "occasional".

   a high degree of wrong   

Please believe me, female doctor is not the kind in the "movie" "Music" "Photos" "games" and other folders, resolutely point into the "paper" of the Lord.

 The male doctor is not even.  In fact, whether Master or doctor, they are only in the education, in universities or research institutes to continue to study, "high education" only represents the group in their own professional education level. And in other ways, they are absolutely normal and absolutely ordinary. However, in the issue of marriage, graduate students are troubled by their academic background.   "High education" brings about another kind of labeling effect--in secular life, it often has a kind of association with the reputation of money, and in marriage, it plays a variety of subtle relations. Since the general awareness of the parents of this society is "Zaguomaitie also have to be for children to go to college", then choosing a doctor as a companion will, to some extent, become a "high-quality embodiment".  Moreover, a lot of doctor as a companion often also fancy this "potential stock", it is no wonder that a public tube doctor classmate's girlfriend even want to move, also must follow me this can't accompany her to buy cloth wardrobe classmate. Look at that, it's really a balm!  but is that really the case?  even if it is possible to chase Tfboys the latest song, in the Marriage problem, "good match" traditional ideas will be no suspense to occupy the upper hand. In fact, this is not a feudal ideology, in the current society, "good match" has included a family background outside the degree of education, ideas, occupations, income and other multi-dimensional dimensions. It should be interpreted more accurately as "the optimal collocation of various objective factors seeking to stabilize marital status".  in this, "education", and often with income pay, career prospects, life concept and so on have a certain correspondence. Therefore, "highly educated" graduate students in the search for "matching resources" often also in the "scarce" state. This has produced the topic of "female Doctor" which is often discussed in society.  but the person who is in love with a female doctor is by no means the fourth class.  "High education" dilemma in addition to "configuration too high", difficult to find a suitable marriage to meet psychological expectations outside, there is a more important problem is that the lack of enough love guidance, in the "high degree" behind often may correspond to "love low energy."  compared to the working age of the youth, there are many different ages of colleagues can provide life guidance, met the kind of "square dance Aunt" and even the whole package. However, in the campus, graduate student's communication is often just peers, can teach you "how to fix Gwen" mentor seems less than the South China Tigers.  

Unlike the undergraduates ' love, the decline of communicative time makes the love index of graduate students fall on the cliff. One of the TA colleagues complained that "there are a lot of opportunities and energy to meet different people during the undergraduate period, but after reading the blog, most of the time is on the study, and the teachers and the graduate students who meet the most every day." ”

 

This is a group of people who need to be cared for!

   two · Emperor son down Xi bei Zhu   

The encounter between the true man and the perfect goddess seems to have only appeared in the eyes of lovers. Those rotten streets of the beautiful encounter seems to always have a quiet street, soft sunshine, a breeze brushed hair, but also with the number is so right pedestrian, male and female in the crowd between the smile, like the sound of blossoming flowers, it is best to have a little more colorful petals or leaves.

  all of these are readily on campus. However, the identity of the male and female will always be so fixed several modes-brother and sister, senior and undergraduate classmate's sister, brother and the next-door dorm sister, brother and Social work Companion's sister, there are "strange" of the sister and brother.   undoubtedly, for graduate students, a large number of couples are classmates and because of the relationship between classmates and acquaintances. For many of the graduates who have already worked, one of the most beneficial things about the campus is "a lot more opportunities to reach the same age and level of the opposite sex in college." In the work unit, it is true that the age of marriage is much less than the university, and even some units to rely on the old staff "introduction" to solve the problem.   from here, the graduate student community seems to be a lot of happiness--high-grade stable senior, virtuous housekeeping of the elder sister, intimate stupid and cute brother and "silly White sweet" sister, can be anything, even the author of this 5-word class old bacon is not afraid of being referred to as "brute" to find a 5-word class of small meat is not   but is that really the case?   graduate students in the proportion of students in the majority of the other side, the exposure is precisely the graduate communication circle of the single. Compared with undergraduates, the daily contact of graduate students is basically the same as the laboratory and classmates. such as the author of this steel welding materials laboratory, Sister Basic is to walk a only to one, the classmate of the ratio of male and female students more than when the deviation. Moreover, the single graduate student life also makes the graduate student's communication worse. In the undergraduate, there are many organizations, cross-professional courses can make different professional students collide with each other, but suitable for graduate students in colleges and universities are annals, graduate students seem to rely on the Department of Social Dance to emergency.   at the same time, another problem that cannot be overlooked is that graduate students ' love and marriage problems are more lacking in skills and purposeful. Some of those who are in the graduate stage are more reluctant to "play" The experience of love, and ready to go straight to the topic. "Not to marry for the purpose of falling in Love Is Blind (Shua) Busy (Liu) live (Mang)" more intense consciousness. However, this very mismatch is the lack of methodological guidance, so that the graduate community lacks self-confidence. Know, love psychology plate that a bunch of asked "female doctor really good to marry" the post is visible.   on the one hand is the strong age of marriage motive, on the other hand is a little poor love practice teaching. Graduate student, this "highly educated" group in this twist Bazhong, up and down quest.   

So, male girlfriends and confidante is so rampant in the campus.

   three · perceptual thresholds for absolute rationality   

The author of high school students in the northeast after graduating from the best university, to the hometown of a university work, because it is 985 doctoral graduate, and 8 SCI, directly to the Associate professor. As a result, a school housing will be decoration, the first thing is to get married. After 9 Blind Date failed, finally in the author's father's matchmaking, and a graduate student at his university married.

  yes, the real thing is the dog blood. Last year was the first batch of undergraduate students PhD graduates. In the familiar 5 students, incredibly in this year without exception, "Married to the past."  for Ben Three of the older graduate student community, take the child to attend the graduation ceremony is "high match", the degree certificate marriage certificate together is "standard", the single go out is also considered "low match".   for postgraduate groups, the marriage age is generally late. In particular, girls are often "boil" to the elderly to complete their own life.   this one, both helpless, but also inevitable.   for graduate students, especially doctoral students, often their own career, income and so on have not formed, in the absence of economic fundamentals under the premise of entering into marriage, often face many problems. "Lowly husband and wife Pepsi Sorrow", very few doctoral students can be carried out before graduation on the burden of "childcare."  

In addition, for the group not out of the campus, "employment" is always a hurdle. Therefore, many do not have the ideal marriage of doctoral students, such as the author's deskmate, more simply choose the "first Liye, after a family." In fact, this strategy is the most effective way to avoid risks and improve input-output returns. When the location, income and life of the business are stable, the marriage will be more predictable.

  However, when faced with "the man is too rational to love is it certain that he does not love a girl?" "What answer does Dr. Gerger give when it comes to such a question?"   as is known to say, the degree of human sensibility and rationality is different, but the feeling of most people in the face of love is not rational. However, in other areas, such as academic, focused graduate students can really be able to be very rational to the feelings and their contacts with the object, such as almost not jealous (or even jealous and do not show), do not do or rarely do romantic things, ask "even if love each other is still independent of the individual" such a space, Encounter contradictions will not quarrel with each other, but ask both sides to calm down before communication. It's just a matter of character, not emotional input.   this seemingly "absolute rationality" situation presents a unique landscape of graduate marriages-most graduate students still maintain their pre-marital status after marriage. Their wedding often only notice small scope, many years old classmate just occasionally learned that xxx has been married, in employment often after the side of employment will be to avoid off-site and give up better job opportunities.  

Perhaps, the campus of the dull is worth their life to protect the love.

   the youth of the end   

The night has been deep, when the author knocked over these words, received a roommate to help contact his girlfriend's roommate-my social worker's study sister, it sounds that they are because of the meal back to school is a taxi or take a bus and quarrel. Is that a good news?

  after all, I still dialed the phone to help.   think of the annual light-mixing festival, how many boys and girls in the light of the banner of the mixed festival began their own violent love offensive, if said can be more than a few times in the Postgraduate Stage Light Mixed festival is also a kind of happy words, then facing academic pressure and unknown future boys and girls Why care about a few "the moment of the moon"?  at this time, outside the laboratory, the lively are TA's lively, only the polishing machine in the sample between the soft friction with me-this "romantic" Dr. Life.  

Singles Day, how to rationally talk about "graduate single problem"?