The fourth letter to Chinese students: the four years of university should be like this (strongly recommended)

Today, I replied to the 1,000th questions that have been raised since the "enable student network" was opened. After I turn off my computer, a letter from a student is always lingering in my mind:

　　Instructor Kaifu:

It's about to graduate.

Looking back at your so-called college life,

I want to cry, not because I leave, but because I have not learned anything.

I don't know how to write my resume. I will leave it blank in the past.

The biggest benefit may be ...... Have no patience or adaptability to anything ......

This letter tells the voices of many junior and senior students. During the University, many students let themselves go, idle time, and many students still cannot find the correct learning direction. When they were awakened by the first retake notice, when they received the first rejection letter from the applicant company, these students were surprised to find that their future was so slim, it seems that all efforts are too late ......

This "fourth letter" is written to college students who wish to wake up from ignorance earlier, those who have never been greedy and want to grasp their future and destiny, and those who are about to enter the university threshold. In this letter, I want to say:

University is the most critical stage in a person's life. From the first day of admission, you should have a correct understanding and plan for the four years of university. In order to enjoy the greatest happiness in your studies and find your favorite job at graduation, everyone who just entered the university campus should master seven learning items: learn the path of self-cultivation, basic knowledge, practice integration, Interest Cultivation, proactive, time-control, and human affairs. As long as these seven points are completed, the greatest achievement of college students upon graduation will never be "no patience or adaptation to anything ", instead, it should be "self-confidence and desire for everything ". Once you finish these seven points, you can become a promising, thoughtful, valuable, and promising graduate.

　　University: the key to life

University is a key stage in life. This is because, when you enter the university, you finally put down the burden of the College Entrance Examination. For the first time, you began to pursue your own ideals and interests. This is the first time you have left your home and joined a group or social life independently. This is the first time that you no longer simply learn or recite theoretical knowledge from books. This is the first time that you no longer have your parents to arrange for everything in your life and study. Instead, you have enough freedom to deal with all kinds of problems encountered in your life and study and control all your own time.

University is a key stage in life. This is because, for the last time in your life, you have the opportunity to systematically receive education. This is the last time you can fully build your knowledge base. This may be the last time you can use a large period of time to learn the stages of life, or the last time you can have a high plasticity and concentrate on enriching your own growth process. This may be the last time you were able to be relatively tolerant and be able to stay in the ideal environment for learning the path of human life.

University is a key stage in life. At this stage, all college students should carefully grasp every "first" and make them the cornerstone of their future life. At this stage, all college students should cherish every "last time" and never regret it in the near future. In the four years of college, everyone should strive to build their own life dreams, clarify the direction of struggle, and lay the foundation for their career.

Every university has only one time in four years, so you should spend four years in college ......

　　Self-repair: from the opposite to the lack of teachers

I remember when I was a TA at Columbia University, a Chinese student's parent complained to me: "What are you teaching in college? After reading the sophomore computer system, my child won't even use visic1c ."

I replied: "The development of computers is changing with each other. We cannot guarantee that any technology taught in the university will still work after five years, nor can we ensure that students can learn every technology and work equipment. What we can ensure is that your child will learn to think and master the learning methods. In this way, no matter what new technologies or tools will appear in the next five years, your child will be able to work well ."

She went on to ask: "learning the latest software is not education. What is the essence of education ?"

I replied, "if we forget what we have learned, the last thing we have left is the essence of education ."

What I said at that time came from the famous saying of B. F. Skinner, an educator. The so-called "what is left" is actually the ability of self-study, that is, the ability to draw inferences from each other or to be self-taught. The university is not a "professional training course", but a platform for students to adapt to different jobs and adapt to the society. In college, it is important to learn professional knowledge, but more importantly, we need to learn independent ways of thinking and cultivate our abilities. Only in this way can university graduates adapt to the future world of instant interest. I know many of my friends who have studied in the United States after finishing college in China. They believe that, after coming to the United States, they lack the ability to think independently, whether studying, working, or living. Because in the country, they seldom think independently and make independent decisions.

At school, the teacher will repeat the key content of each lesson again and again. However, after entering the University, the teacher will only act as a guide, and students must learn, explore, and practice on their own. After taking up the job, self-learning becomes more important. Microsoft once made a Statistical Statement: only about 10% of the knowledge that each Microsoft employee has learned in the past, other knowledge is re-learned after joining Microsoft. This data shows that it is difficult for a person who lacks the ability to learn independently to establish a foothold in a modern enterprise such as Microsoft.

Self-learning skills must be developed during University. Many students always complain that the teachers do not teach well and do not know much about it. The school curriculum is unreasonable. I usually advise these students to say, "instead of cursing the darkness, light the candle ". College students should not only follow the teacher's footsteps, but should take the initiative to walk in front of the teacher. For example, a university teacher usually needs to cover dozens of pages of information in a textbook in a lesson. It is impossible to learn all the knowledge through classroom listening alone. The best way to learn is to clarify the relevant questions in the textbook before the teacher gives a lecture, and then compare the teacher's explanations in the classroom to make up for the deficiencies in understanding and understanding.

When learning knowledge, middle school students are more interested in "Remembering" knowledge, and college students should require themselves to "understand" knowledge and be good at asking questions. For every knowledge point, you should ask a few more "why ". Once you really understand the ins and outs of theories or methods, you can learn other things, solve other problems, or even reach the realm of being self-disciplined.

In fact, many problems have different ideas or perspectives. When learning knowledge or solving problems, do not always stick to a mode of thinking, and do not make yourself a slave of textbooks or experience. Only by daring to innovate in learning and being good at thinking about problems from a new perspective can the potential thinking, creative and learning abilities of students be truly stimulated.

In the "Li Ji. Xue Ji": "If you are a student and have no friends, you will be alone and ignorant ". That is to say, college students should make full use of the Talent Resources in the school and absorb knowledge and methods from various channels. If you meet a good teacher, you can take the initiative to ask them, or ask them to recommend some extra-curricular reference books. In addition to senior professors, young teachers, doctoral students, master students, and even their classmates in the university are the best sources of knowledge and learning partners. Everyone has different understandings and understandings of the problem. Only by helping each other and learning from each other can everyone make progress together.

Some students once told me that they envy me that when I was studying, I had a master who had received the Turing Award to teach. In fact, although I highly recommend my teacher, he did not teach me much professional knowledge during his college years. He just pointed out the direction for me to share his experience, provide me with research resources, and teach me how to behave. He does not have time or need to instruct me to learn specific professional knowledge. The professional knowledge I accumulated during my college years is obtained through self-study. When I first started, I turned to my senior friend for the most basic knowledge. During the meeting, I asked a lot of superficial questions, in my spare time, I also discuss and discuss with my colleagues. "Three people must have our teachers." college students are surrounded by good teachers and friends. We can learn the most useful knowledge and methods as long as we cherish these rare opportunities, boldly ask questions, and learn from each other frequently.

College students should make full use of libraries and the Internet to cultivate independent learning and research skills and prepare for future work or further study. First, in addition to learning the courses prescribed by teachers, college students must learn to search for books and documents to gain access to a wider range of knowledge and research results. For example, when we discover a topic that we are interested in a course, we should actively go to the library to check the relevant literature and understand the ins and outs of this topic and the current research trends. Skillful and full use of library resources is one of the essential skills for college students, especially those interested in scientific research. When reading, read as many original English textbooks as possible. Some Original textbooks are written in a simple way, with a large number of examples, and are more suitable for self-study than Chinese textbooks. Second, in addition to books, the Internet is also a huge resource library. college students can use search engines to search for various types of information on the Internet. I have discovered that many of my students have not mastered the internet search skills well since I opened the "Kaifu student network" for six months. Sometimes, they only need to simply search questions in the search engine, you can easily find the answer. In addition, some people can easily trust rumors on the internet, instead of using the search engine to test and verify their own. In addition to search engines, there are also many websites and communities on the Internet, which are also good learning areas.

From school, do not be complacent because you meet the requirements of the school, or think that it is enough to do your homework well in college. In the 21st century, talent has become an international concept. When you are satisfied with your score, I suggest you start to learn courses for some world-class universities. For example, the open courses of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) have been released online for free. You may wish to take a look at the MIT online courses and do the MIT online questions. When you have the freedom to master the MIT course, you can face the challenges of internationalization with greater confidence.

In short, it is the best gift you can give yourself in the four years of college to learn how to be self-taught.

　　Basic knowledge: mathematics, English, computer, Internet

I once said that a major advantage of Chinese students is solid basic knowledge, such as mathematics and physics. However, in recent years, after seeing many success stories, the students are eager to drive on the fast lane of success. This gradually forms an impetuous fashion of fast-paced pursuit. Many college students dream that they can become "managers" and "bosses" immediately after graduation, and many college students directly choose "management" when they enter school, because they think that they can become managers immediately after graduation from such a major. After entering the management major, many students find that they are not interested in the study of this major. As a matter of fact, the management major, like other majors, is a place to teach basic knowledge and basic methods. No major can ensure that students can take leadership positions at graduation. No matter which major students are studying, university graduation is the true start of their individual career. If you want to be an enterprise leader or want to do management work, you must also start from the grassroots level. You must first learn how to behave in terms of character and lay a solid foundation in your studies.

If the University is a platform for learning and progress, the foundation of this platform is the basic courses in the university. During college, students must learn basic knowledge, including mathematics, English, computer, and Internet usage, and basic courses required by this major (such as finance and economics courses of business schools ). Today, with the rapid development of science and technology, many seemingly advanced technologies in the application field will be replaced by new technologies or tools in a few years. Only basic knowledge can be used for life. On the other hand, without laying a good foundation, it is difficult for college students to really understand advanced application technologies. Finally, in many Chinese universities, professors have more experience in basic courses than in the latest technology.

Mathematics is an essential foundation for science and engineering students. Many students think that mathematics is the most difficult to learn in high school. Once they find that their major does not have high requirements for mathematics, they will completely relax their study of mathematics knowledge, moreover, they cannot see the practical application or employment prospects of mathematics knowledge. But do not forget that the vast majority of knowledge systems of science and engineering majors are built on the foundation of mathematics. For example, if you want to learn computer engineering well, you must at least learn Discrete Mathematics (including set theory, graph theory, and mathematical logic), linear algebra, probability statistics, and mathematical analysis; A higher mathematical literacy may be required to pursue a master's or doctorate degree in computer science. At the same time, mathematics is also the crystallization of human wisdom accumulated over thousands of years. learning mathematics knowledge can cultivate and train people's thinking abilities. Through learning ry, we can learn how to use deduction and reasoning to verify and think. Through Learning probability statistics, we can know how to avoid getting into the dead end of thinking, how to maximize opportunities in front of you. Therefore, you must learn mathematics well with your heart. Learning Mathematics cannot be limited to taking multiple mathematics courses. Instead, you need to know why you are learning mathematics, and master the cognitive and thinking methods from the process of learning mathematics.

The most important communication tool in the 21st century is English. Some students study English only for CET4 and cet6 in college. Some students only take English as an essential skill for job hunting, some people even think that learning and using English is the same as learning and using English. In fact, the fundamental purpose of learning English is to master an important learning and communication tool. In the next few decades, the world's most comprehensive news content, the most advanced ideas, the highest depth of technology, and communication between most intellectuals will be conducted in English. Therefore, unless you are willing to be a person out of touch with the world, English learning is crucial. In the software industry, not only are programming languages designed based on English, but most of the most important resources such as teaching materials, papers, references, and user manuals are written in English. Learning English is not the same as learning English. China is moving towards the world. China needs to learn advanced Western ideas and advanced science and technology. learning English well is truly patriotic.

Many Chinese students have good scores in English and have passed CET-4, cet6, and TOEFL at high scores. However, it is difficult to understand the course content when studying in the United States, it is more difficult to communicate with foreign students. How can we learn English well? Since English is the most important communication tool, the most important learning method is to combine it with practice as much as possible ", more importantly, you cannot learn English only by reciting it. When reading books, read the original professional teaching materials as much as possible (if the English is not good enough, you can start with the English-to-English textbooks) and read some professional papers that you are interested in, this can improve the knowledge of English and related majors at the same time. Second, the best way to improve the listening and speaking ability is to directly talk to foreigners in the English language. Now there are many foreigners studying and working in China. Many of them are willing to talk and communicate with Chinese students in order to learn Chinese. This is a good learning opportunity. In addition, you should not take learning English as a chore. You can learn English in an interesting way. For example, you can read conversations or speeches from celebrities and read novels, plays, and even cartoons. Beginners can learn through original English teaching programs and videos. If you have a certain foundation, you should watch English TVs or movies. When watching an English movie, you 'd better first watch it when you have subtitles. At the same time, check for new words, familiar sentences, and then read it again without subtitles, listen with your ears. Listening to English broadcasts is also a good way to practice English listening. You 'd better spend half an hour or an hour every day listening to the broadcasts and try to understand the content. If necessary, you can also record and listen to the broadcasts. There are also many Interactive English learning websites on the Internet. You can use games, self-testing, and bilingual reading to improve your English proficiency. In short, the courage to practice and perseverance are the only way to learn English.

The information age has arrived, and college students' accomplishments in information science and information technology have become one of the essential foundations for them to enter the society. Although not every college student needs to understand computer principles and programming knowledge, all college students should be proficient in computer, Internet, office software and search engines, they should be able to browse information and search for professional knowledge on the Internet. In the 21st century, using computers and networks is just like using paper and pens. Without learning computer science, you cannot quickly and comprehensively obtain the knowledge or information you need.

Finally, each specific major also has its own basic courses. Taking computer science as an example, many college students are keen only to learn the latest languages, technologies, platforms, standards and tools, because many companies require the basics or experience in recruitment. Although these new technologies should be learned, the learning of basic computer courses is more important because the development of languages and platforms is changing with each passing day, however, as long as you learn basic courses (such as data structures, algorithms, compilation principles, computer principles, and database principles), you will be able to keep things apart. One student vividly compared these basic courses to the internal skills of the Computer Major, and compared the new languages, technologies, platforms, standards and tools with external skills. Those students who only know how to pursue fashion finally only know some tricks, but cannot become real masters without the accumulation of internal skills.

Although I have always encouraged everyone to pursue their own interests, I still need to emphasize that some things in life must be done even if they are not interested. For example, to lay a good foundation, learning mathematics, English, and computer well is a must. If you are interested in mathematics, English, and computers, you are lucky to enjoy the fun of learning. But even if you are not interested, you must lay a good foundation. The Foundation is hard work, and failure to endure hardship cannot be justified.

　　Practice: "What you have done is really clear"

When I was in high school, many students asked the teacher "Why? What is the purpose ?" Usually, the answer given by the teacher is "not allowed to ask ". After entering college, the answer to these questions should be "don't ask ". In college, students should know how to combine the knowledge, Theories, Methods, and specific practices and applications of each discipline, especially for engineering students.

There is a saying about practice: "What I hear will be forgotten. What I see can be remembered. What I have done can be truly understood ."

No matter what kind of major or course you are studying, if you can practice it in your learning and achieve integration, we can gain a deeper understanding of the knowledge system and remember the learned knowledge. Therefore, I suggest that you select more professional courses related to practice. In practice, it is best to work with several students. In this way, you can understand professional knowledge, learn how to work with others, and cultivate team spirit. If you have the opportunity to do some practical projects under the teacher or work out of school, these practices are encouraging as long as they do not affect the course industry. When you go out to work or work on projects, do not just pay attention to the salary (unless there is a real difficulty in your life). Sometimes, even if the treatment is not satisfactory, there are many opportunities for training and practice, we also deserve a try.

Taking computer science as an example, practical experience is essential for software development. Microsoft hopes that the university graduates who apply for programmers should have 100,000 rows of programming experience. The reason is simple: practical technologies must be improved in practice. In the final analysis, a computer is a practical knowledge, and it will never be learned without hands-on. Therefore, the most important thing is not to take a high score in the written examination, but to practice ability. However, during my communication with Chinese students, I was surprised to find that students in computer science in some Chinese schools are still not programming when they reach their junior year. The teaching methods and courses in these universities need to be updated. If you do not study in such a school, you should seek opportunities to learn and practice from the process of working, self-study, or surfing the Internet. Many practical projects can be found on the Internet. For example, a group of programming-loving students have established a website (www.diyinside.com) to discuss software technology and share their knowledge and practical experience, we have successfully held many events (such as holding campus technical education conferences in colleges and universities) and published books to help students improve their skills and solve problems, many members of the website have won the title of "Microsoft's most valuable expert.

 

　　Interest Cultivation: broaden your horizons and set your aspirations

Confucius said: "The wise is better than the good, and the better is better than the happy one ." In my "third letter to Chinese students", I have discussed in depth that happiness and interest are the key to a person's success. If you are passionate about a domain, you may be able to exert all your potential in this field, or even get rid of it. At this time, you have learned not to succeed, but to "enjoy. In the "third letter", I also talked about how I gave up my law major that I was not interested in while I was in college and entered my favorite computer Major.

Some people asked me how I could find my own interests like I did? In my opinion, first of all, we should objectively evaluate and find our own interests: do not treat the events recognized and valued by society, family members, or friends as our own hobbies; do not think that interesting things are about your own interests. Instead, try it yourself and use your own mind to make judgments. Do not think that you can become a profession if you are interested in things, for example, playing online games doesn't mean you will like or have the ability to develop online games. Don't think that you are interested in it, it means you have the talent in this area. However, you can try your best to find the best combination of talent and interest. For example, if you are talented in logarithm learning but prefer computer science, you can do research on computer theory.

The best way to find interest points is to open up your own horizons and engage in a wide range of fields. Only by reaching out to you can you try and find your favorite. The university is such a unique place that allows you to touch and try out many fields. Therefore, college students should better grasp the school time and make full use of school resources, use library resources, attend courses, search for networks, listen to lectures, work, participate in community activities, communicate with friends, use emails and e-forums, and other methods to access more fields. more types of work and more experts and scholars. In those years, if I went to the Law Department without trying to attend computer courses, I would not go to the computer center to work or consult with the computer department TA, you will not find yourself interested in computers.

If you discover your real interests and hobbies, you can try to transfer to another department, study outside the classroom, take an optional course, or attend related courses; you can also find some job or holiday internship opportunities to further understand the nature of the job in the relevant industry. Or, you can try to take a postgraduate exam of your desired major and make another professional choice. In fact, what Major does undergraduate students do not fully determine the job orientation after graduation. As I have emphasized, the learning process during college is to cultivate your learning ability, as long as you have the ability to do this, even if you are engaged in a new job, you can also get enough knowledge and experience while learning.

In addition to "choosing what you love", you may also try "choosing what you love ". Some students regret that they chose the wrong major when they entered the school, so that they were not interested in the majors they learned and did not have the motivation to learn. Some of them were "fascinated by the pursuit of interest ", after graduation, I found that the courses of this major were abandoned. Some other students were unwilling to face their major on the pretext of interest because they encountered difficulties in learning or biased towards this major. These practices are incorrect. In college, it may not be easy to transfer to a department. Therefore, you should first try your best to read this major and gradually cultivate your own interests in this major. In addition, a major may have many different fields, and you may be interested in a certain field of the Major. At present, many majors have developed interdisciplinary disciplines. The combination of the two majors is often a new growth point. Therefore, as long as you touch and try more, you may encounter a direction that you are really interested in. Dr. Wang Jian, inventor of "number pen", is responsible for the user interface research at the Microsoft Asia Research Institute. But who can think that he has studied psychology from his undergraduate course to his PhD, the user interface is the best combination of computer and psychology majors. On the other hand, even if you want to engage in other industries after graduation, you can still read your major well, which can also become your advantage in the new industry. For example, if one of my students does not like engineering and want to enter the service industry after graduation, I suggest that he read Engineering Well first. In the future, he can take proficient technology as his specialty in the service industry.

The road to life is long. Everyone can have many different interests and hobbies. In addition to seeking for interest, it is more important to find your lifelong ambition. The author of a book visited hundreds of successful people and asked them what they knew today, but they left regrets when they were young. Among the respondents, one of the most is: "I hope that when I was young, some Predecessors will tell me and encourage me to pursue my own ideals and aspirations ." In contrast, interest is key, but ambition is more important. For example, my ambition is to "maximize influence". Over the years, I have many interests, such as speech recognition, NLP software, multimedia, research-to-development transformation, management, meeting user needs, presentations and writing, helping Chinese students, etc. interest can change, but my ambition is always the same. Therefore, you do not have to consider an interest as your final goal, or completely cut off the development path of any interest. Under the guidance of your ambition, different interests can be developed in parallel and the best choice can be made if necessary. Ambition is like a compass. Interest is like sailing. The two complement each other and are indispensable. They can drive you to the ideal harbor.

　　Proactive: decisive and responsible, creating opportunities

When I created the "Kaifu student network", my original intention was to "help students help themselves ". However, I was surprised that more students wanted me to make decisions directly for them, and even said to me directly after a few brief introductions: "Only you can tell me how to do it ". Does a stranger know how to do it better than you do? I gradually realized that this passive way of thinking was developed from an early stage in China's education environment. Passive people always habitually think that their current situation is caused by others and the environment. If others do not give directions and the environment does not change, they will only live passively. People with this attitude have been defeated before their career begins. I have never seen such a negative person achieve continuous success.

From the first day of college, you must turn from passive to active. You must become your future master. You must actively manage your studies and future career for a simple reason: because no one cares more about your work and life than you do. It is your responsibility to "make university life valuable to yourself. Many students start to develop their lives and career plans in their senior years. An active student should plan his own future from the beginning of college.

The first step of being proactive is to have a positive attitude. You can use the method recommended in the "third letter" to actively plan your own life goals, pursue your interests and try new knowledge and fields. Victor frankell, a survivor of a concentration camp in Nazi Germany, once said: "In any particular environment, people still have the last freedom to choose their own attitude ."

The second step of the initiative is to take responsibility for all of your own and face your life bravely. Do not put uncertain or difficult things on hold. For example, some students think that English is important, but they do not learn English if they do not take the test. Alternatively, some students feel that they need to join the Community to hone their interpersonal relationships, but do not register actively because they are shy. However, we must realize that not solving the problem is also a solution, and not making a decision is also a decision. Such a solution and decision will lead to the loss of opportunities in front of you. You will pay the price one day for this negative and timid style.

The third step of being proactive is to make full preparations: do everything with your heart, and do your best. Do not wait for opportunities to come to the door. seize the opportunities and create opportunities. Academician Zhu qingshi, president of the Chinese Emy of Science and Technology, was assigned to Qinghai as a foundry worker during his junior year. But he doesn't give up learning like other students, playing poker and drinking all day. He still studies mathematics, physics, and English all day long. Six years later, the Chinese Emy of Sciences wanted to build an important project in Qinghai. Then, president Zhu stood out and started his brilliant career. Many people may say that he is lucky and has been assigned to Qinghai, which lacks talents. However, if he does not study hard, he cannot seize this opportunity. Therefore, make full preparations. Only when the opportunity comes can you seize it.

The fourth proactive step is to start from the end and actively plan the University for four years. Any plan will be the end of a certain stage and the start point of your next stage, and your ambition and interest will provide you with directions and motivation. If you do not know your aspirations and interests, you should immediately develop a plan to explore your aspirations and interests. If you do not know what to do after graduation, you should immediately develop a plan to try new fields; if you do not know what you lack most, you should immediately write a resume, ask your teachers and friends for a score, or review it on your own to see where you need improvement. If you want to study abroad for a doctor after graduation, you should think about how to give yourself specific research experience and academic papers before applying to go abroad. If you want to work in a company after graduation, you should collect recruitment advertisements for the company, in this way, you can compare your resume to see which tests you lack. As long as you carefully develop, manage, evaluate, and adjust your life plans, you will be closer and closer to your goals.

　　Time in control: Priorities, self-control and self-awareness

In addition to a proactive attitude, college students must learn to arrange their own time and manage their own affairs. One student described university life as follows:

"It seems that there is no big difference between a university and a high school. I still study every day and worry about my score after each exam ...... The difference is that the University has a lot more time to access the Internet and sleep, and the pressure is much lower ."

The student did not understand that "too much time" is a huge difference between the University and the high school. When there is too much time, you need to schedule the time, schedule the time, and manage the time yourself.

In addition to making a schedule, it is more important to set priorities ". In the book "Seven Habits of high-performance people", Steven Covey argues that the difference between "important" and "urgent" is one of the greatest reasons for wasting time. People's inertia is the most urgent thing to do first, but doing so will lead to some important things being ruined. For example, I think all the learning mentioned in this article is "important", but they are not necessarily required courses assigned by teachers, the students who have adopted my suggestions will still waste some important things, such as laying a good foundation and learning to be human, due to urgent tasks such as exams and assignments. Because of this, a good way to manage time every day is to determine the emergency and important tasks to be done in the morning, and review before going to bed, whether the day has achieved a balance between the two.

Everyone has many "urgent" and "important" tasks. it is not practical to do everything. I suggest you separate "what is necessary" from "what is best done. You must do the best, but do the best you can. It is recommended that you use a good attitude and broad mind to accept things you cannot change for the time being and pay more attention to things you can change. In addition, pay attention to the running rules of the biological clock, work and rest on time, so that you can have the best learning status.

Four years of university is the easiest time to get lost. College students must have self-control ability to make good friends and learn good habits. do not indulge in habits that do not benefit themselves (such as online games. An active and active Chinese student advised other students on "Kaifu student network": "Do not play games, at least do not play online games. None of my college friends who have a high level of expertise play online games. Indulging in online games is an escape from reality and unwilling to face your own shortcomings. In my opinion, to break away from online games, you have to cherish your precious college time, find the direction you are interested in, and do something meaningful and satisfying ."

　　Serving people: cultivating friendship and joining groups

Many college students leave their parents for the first time and leave their own environment. After entering the campus and starting a collective life, how to get along with classmates, friends, and Community colleagues has become part of the content of college students. The University is the last time you can learn, train, and train people in a relatively relaxed environment. In the future, people's ability to get along with others in society and at work will become more and more important, even surpassing the work itself. Therefore, college students should seize the opportunity and cultivate their communication awareness and team spirit.

"The interpersonal skills are not strong enough, and the interpersonal circles are not wide enough, but there is no special skill to attract everyone's attention. In the community, I do not know how to effectively establish connections with others ." This is a problem that college students often encounter in interpersonal communication. My suggestions for improving interpersonal skills during college are as follows:

First, treat people with sincerity, blame people for themselves, and forgive others. Be sincere and tolerant to others, and be self-criticized and changed. How do you treat others and others treat you when you interact with others. This is like looking in the mirror. Your own expressions and attitudes can display a clear view of others' expressions and attitudes towards you. If you treat people with sincerity, others will treat you with sincerity. If you are hostile to others, others will be hostile to you. The most sincere friendship and the most difficult hate are gradually caused by this "reflection" principle. Therefore, when you want to correct others, you should first correct yourself. If you think about how others treat you, you should do it to people. If you want others to understand you, you must first understand others.

Second, cultivate true friendship. If you can do the first thing, many college friends will become your confidant for the rest of your life. On the road of studying together and seeking for development, such friendship is precious. When making friends, do not just look for people who are close to you or will only be friends with you. There are many good friends: optimistic friends, smart friends, down-to-earth friends, humorous friends, inspiring friends, improving your abilities, helping you understand your friends, telling you the truth and so on. In addition, falling in love in college can also teach you how to take care of others and improve empathy and self-control. However, falling in love is always at your fingertips, so you don't have to fall in love in order to fall in love.

Third, learn the team spirit and communication skills. Community is a micro society, and participation in community is the best training before entering the society. In the community, you can cultivate the ability and leadership of teamwork, and you can also take advantage of your professional expertise. But more importantly, you must be a sincere service provider and volunteer, or take the initiative to play the role of a bridge between students and teachers when serving as students, in this way, we can train our communication skills to serve our students and teachers. Such a learning process will not be very easy. Setbacks are certain, but don't be discouraged. Interpersonal Communication in university organizations is a kind of study that does not require "paying tuition, if you make a mistake, you can try again.

Fourth, learn from people around you. In the class and community, observe more people around you, especially those who think they are extremely competent in communication and communication, to see how they get along with others. For example, how they deal with conflicts in communication, how to persuade others and influence others, how to exert their cooperation and coordination capabilities, how to express respect and sincerity for others, and how to approve or oppose others, how to fully show your personality without offending others. Through observation and imitation, you will gradually find that your interpersonal skills will be unexpectedly improved. In school, every friend can be your mentor. Their enthusiasm, humor, wit, erudition, integrity, communication, courtesy and other qualities can all be your learning objects. At the same time, the people and things you don't like can also sound the alarm for you, warning you never do such people and things. Of course, you should also generously help every friend and try to be their mentor and model.

Fifth, improve self-cultivation and Personality Charm. If you feel that you have no special skills or hobbies, it may become an obstacle to improving your interpersonal skills, so you can consciously choose and cultivate some hobbies. Mutual interests and hobbies are also one of the ways for you to establish deep feelings with your friends. Many people who have made achievements in their careers are not just geeks who are hard-reading. Most of them have their own interests and hobbies. My colleagues at the Microsoft Asia Research Institute have mastered painting, bridge and sports. Hobbies are not only a form of interpersonal communication, but also enable everyone to discover their potential in addition to reading. For example, physical education can not only exert your sports potential, but also cultivate your team spirit. If you really don't have any interests or hobbies, then reading more books and enriching your knowledge can also improve your interpersonal skills, because nothing is more intelligent and profound than a person's personality charm.

Therefore, learning to get along with others is also a "Required Course" in the university ".

　　Expectations for College Students

When you step into the university, you are still a busy, green, passive, score-oriented, family-protected middle school graduate.

When you are in college, you should master seven learning items, learn your self-learning path, basic knowledge, practice, Interest Cultivation, be proactive, take control of time, and do things for others.

After four years of college, you will establish yourself from your thoughts, seek truth from your studies, experience autonomy from your independence, grasp the time in your plans, and exercise your expressions in communication, taste maturity from making friends, win value from practice, get happiness from interest, and gain strength from pursuit.

Once you leave college, your greatest achievement will be "self-confidence and desire for everything ". You can become the masters of China's future with potential, thoughts, values, and prospects.

Therefore, I think the four years of college should be like this.