The so-called freedom and ideals are the puppets of money

Seven o'clock this evening, dad suddenly called, because at that time in the company overtime, also did not answer, only a text message: I'll call you back later. Eight o'clock work to go to the car, home ready to cook noodles when only think of this thing, quickly to dad called the past, is mom answer the phone. They are already asleep, mom said the phone is asked to ask the good, the recent cold, called more clothes, but also worry about me in this side is not found a job, too bad, and then to them to say at work. I explained that did not cheat them, really is at work, oneself had very good, eat full, wear warm, just went out to play, forgot to call this thing, then mother said the day cold, evening early come back, do not play outside too long, then I call them early rest, hung up the telephone.

Today is really cold, from yesterday, Chongqing has cooled down, but also cooled very steep, sitting in the company, all over the cold uncomfortable. From last week began to say to buy a winter clothes, only when met to spend money, only to know how poor.

July from Mianyang After graduating in a decoration company on a half-month class, a penny did not, and then in an Internet company on the two-month class, 2000 yuan a month, after the resignation of September, moved to Chongqing, began on October 20, the current wage, each month or 2000. To now graduation five months, the day is a day poorer than a day, has borrowed 2000 dollars from friends, because I have embarrassed also ashamed to ask for money, I must rely on their own, graduated five months of this look, is I unexpectedly, the reality of the society, to me this young people on a deep lesson.

The work is not good, but I still have the ideal, also has the freedom which oneself wants. Now life is seven o'clock every day to get up, to work one hours subway, eight o'clock night, work on the road every day to spend three hours, not late work to run to the subway station, because must catch up with 85 that train, or will wait 20 minutes, no accident, 94 can get home, The happiest thing to go home is to cook a bowl of your favorite hot noodles. Every day in the eyes of ordinary people, it is too frustrating, too long to work, but I do not have more money to change the status quo, not to rent a house near a point, bet a pay three is I can not afford to play, thank the roommate here, solve the problem I have no money to rent.

The most distressed weekend is to go to the supermarket, usually work at home to eat noodles, the weekend is not, I can not let my girlfriend follow me eat noodles every day. Even if you are bitter, you cannot let those who love you suffer. She knew I was poor, every time shopping for groceries she would grab the bill, she wanted to drink Ann screen Greek yogurt, to her to take, until the cashier, only to find that she returned to, she did not want me to waste more money, I am so worthless, please girlfriend to drink a bottle of yogurt is so difficult.

Remember, number 14th, promise her. Weekend accompany her to go shopping, together to buy winter clothes, her parents to give her money, the school also issued scholarships, Winter also came, I 15th also to pay wages, can 15th number I went to the company but only received 500 yuan, home after pay 400 block of rent, then I have been a collapse to the pole, I'm all messed up, what kind of life I've been in. Weekend shopping things canceled, she can understand me, but in order to make up the date, the next day, I began to raise money, embarrassed to borrow 500 dollars to a friend, and then went to handle a credit card, know that the credit card has not been processed down, thought a week can be processed down, and then take the credit card to go shopping for winter clothes, Everything is still a plan to keep up with the changes.

Today, they send a scholarship again, said to invite me to eat grilled fish, this is a very good date, but I have to refuse, I said: "When I make money, please eat!" At night walking on the Shivering road, forget to call Dad back, but always think of this winter continue cold, I how to live. has long not bought winter's thick clothes, several liken from Mianyang moved to Chongqing time, also wore four or five years of autumn pants and knitted shirt to throw away, at that time arrogant said: Graduated, work, to earn money, can buy new. Now there is only a thin coat, it is the body has been worn for three days, I once again lost in the cold wind back.

Five months time, completely changed my state of mind, I want to be strong, I do not lose, I still have the ideal, I still have the pursuit, can still be low head face daily necessities life. Reality let me more clearly see, you pursue the ideal, you want the freedom, everything is to be crushed by reality, the rest of the nut is what you want.

Early November 26, 2015

The so-called freedom and ideals are the puppets of money