A few tips for choosing a mate for a college man
If you think that the most important thing for a man is career success, wife, children and family life is dispensable, then you do not have to waste time to read this post, focus on all the energy to fight is serious.
If your future wife's requirements are only Young + beautiful + virgin on OK, do not have to look down, as long as you earn enough money, the above ideals should not be difficult to achieve.
However, if you are looking for an informed, thick and thin life companion and gentle virtuous child mother, perhaps the following suggestions will help you.
What kind of person do you like?
A comprehensive overview of men's criteria for choosing a mate can be summed up as follows:
The shape is beautiful;
gentle and considerate;
lively and cheerful;
(Welcome to add)
set above the advantages of a woman, do not say rare once in a lifetime, but can meet, know, love the possibility is also very little bar. Therefore, we strongly recommend that you order the above advantages, it is very necessary to clarify what you value most.
young boys on love always have a good imagination, looking forward to meet a "where all good" the right person, and then a friend, "From then on the Prince and Princess live a happy life." And the reality is often "she is beautiful is beautiful, but the temper is too big, is tantrum, still want to get along?" "She is good in all aspects, is not to do housework, home conditions are not very good, really want to marry I will not be very tired?" "No one is perfect, and ultimately you have to tolerate some of the other's shortcomings for the advantages you value most."
second, how to find the person you like?
Some boys cling to the idea of "seeing fate" and "opportunity", clinging to a tree all day long waiting for the rabbit to bump up. Actually play the subjective initiative is very important, but also the situation. If you like the book Girl, to the bookstore, the library to find mm chat may have little effect; but if you're a sunny girl, you might get a lot of benefit from participating in the school's various sports clubs or online groups of backpacking self-help tours. Like a loving MM, volunteer organization is of course the preferred treasure-hunting land.
can not stand some men, most of the work outside the bar disco, but also all day shouting, "Now innocent girls are TMD extinct" ~ ~ ~ I a friend bent to marry an artistic temperament of the boys, her method is often run to the Academy of Fine Arts listening to lectures, I am embarrassed to take the initiative and the boys to meet the girls first know the introduction of the family (as if women have matchmaking of the hobby), so a year after finally meet the beloved, now is the expectant mother. People also did not heaven to the construction site to run, after looking for the worst and then complain, "Now the man how all so no depth" Ah!
What do you like (the type of) people like?
This is the absolute weight of the most important, how to stress is not a part. Let's make a few clips.
Fragment one: College when a boy in love with a girl, obviously the girl in the gossip show like the singer stars are as the male general annoys type, but the boys are very pale and thin self-abased (at that time GJM not famous, hey), must be a muscle to the people to vindicate. So every day to soak in the gym, during which the muscle pulled two times. The final result was that one night I and my roommate (his fellow) dragged him half-way from the tavern and back to school. He reddened his eyes and muttered, "she said she didn't like me ... Why...... I am so hard for him ... Why she still doesn't like me ... "then the girl told me that she hated a muscle block," like a frog!
fragment two: In the street to see a couple quarrel, the girl threw a bag of baked sweet potato on the ground, loudly said: "I told you 10,000 times I do not like to eat baked sweet potato do not love to eat baked sweet potato, I see on the annoying!" I love to eat candied fruit you do not know Ah, every time take baked sweet potato disgusting me you mean ah?! "The boy is also anxious to face red ear teeth:" I this is not good for you, roasted sweet potato and starvation and nutrition, that candied fruit what delicious?! "
fragment three: Once my birthday invited a few of the original friends to eat together, the result of a single man to me a good friend at first sight, immediately launched offensive. My girlfriend a look at it is a typical good girl, this man often put her to bars, disco about. I have reminded him that girls like quiet, his answer is "there is a show in the bar, do not talk and not embarrassed" "" where there are little girls do not like the disco "~ ~ ~ later I asked him how the progress, he said a faint," forget it, your friend shelf is too big, we can not move! " "
Another example is the class boys chasing girls, the whole class know that the girl has serious hay fever, every spring is depressed unceasingly. But the boy was a big bouquet of roses to give others, classmates advised him also do not listen, the reason is still "girls like someone to send flowers." Later ~ ~ ~
a lot of simple boys once fall in love and enthusiastically want to pay for each other, but often ignore the other side of the feelings resulting in even more than the opposite. As the song sings, "Love is not what he gives, it is not what I want." "
So, what does a woman want?
It is estimated that many men will rush to say "money", "house", "economic strength"! In these men's eyes, short can be money cushion, appearance, education, character, temperament and other aspects of the lack of all can be money gathered up. Similarly, as long as the woman refused, regardless of the specific reasons, all think that others are too poor, other reasons are excuses ~ ~ ~ only "things" doctrine, money-oriented women are not uncommon, many of them are very attractive, but basically can be excluded from the "Good Woman" "mother and wife" definition, here is not discussed.
So , good character, have connotation, heavy feelings of the good woman, the most value of men what?
Here is my answer, welcome to add, the female compatriots have the same feeling of a squeak ah.
1. Character them ... we. "Security" This stuff may be the world woman most desire, not only I wait for the general lack of, beauty, rich women are not surplus. And really can give women a sense of security men, not the richest, not the most gesticulating, and perhaps not the most love you, and must be trustworthy, principles, commitment, have the responsibility of the one. Only with such people together, can really "hair knot for husband and wife, love two no doubt."
2. Mild personality, slightly extroverted. With the character of good people to form a family, even if the feelings are not very deep, can not harps harmony, at least can xiangjingrubin, do not worry about what domestic violence. Extrovert character not only helps to open up the situation in the work and interpersonal intercourse, but also can cause the friction between husband and wife to be solved in the first time, the marriage relationship is stable.
3. Broad knowledge, rich experience. As long as the character, character no problem, encyclopedia-like people will be welcomed by colleagues, bosses appreciate, mm worship. Love is said to talk about the "feeling" said "AI", but when two people have been dating for a long time, the situation has been well-established in the * * *, where there are so many "love" can be discussed? Together with the learned man, there is always talk, life will never be boring.
4. Generous and open-minded, inclusive and strong. This is the so-called "good mentality", the top of the basin said, is also the end of the lack of some men. For today's many non-mainstream phenomenon and trend of thought, such as homosexuality, unmarried cohabitation, dink family and "parents without Grace", you are laugh, do not agree but respect the rationality of its existence, or in the online scold "perverted" "Shameless" "Selfish" "ungrateful" to reveal their own clean-up? The face of friends betray, lovers of betrayal, you are the experience, as soon as possible out of the emotional trough, firmly believe that there must be a more beautiful scenery, or anger, crazy revenge even angry at people, or "feel pessimistic and depressed, even began to doubt life," and then down, abandon it?
5. Have a civic-minded, pay attention to accomplishment. Civic-minded will not need me to say, not spitting, not littering, not queuing hoggers, not loud noise should be the basic quality of modern civilized people. But in addition to respect for the privacy of others, save others face, but also include some basic etiquette, such as the public dinner is not smack, no chopsticks on the person pointing, sitting without shaking legs, and avoid trousers shoes with white socks, shorts, jeans with the dress shoes, suits, shirt pockets stuffed bulging and other clothing mistakes.
6. Have a flexible mind and strong adaptability. For example, I am a more than 40-year-old elder (although she is a woman, hehe) introduced into the foreign enterprises, only two years, junior high school graduation, computer, English is not the only thing that she went from cleaning workers to the Administrative Assistant (of course, the kind of primary). At the beginning of the company, she is very diligent and have eyesight see son (is the saying that "there is work in the eyes), every day to clean the office to help finance the invoice, to help the secretary copy, send and receive faxes, help the front desk call Express, order Bento, help manager errands to buy things, and quickly learned a few words commonly used in English Her head was full of office owners ' birthdays (the company has a tradition of celebrating), everyone's phone extension number and cell phone number (only more than 10 people in the office), and everyone bothered to check the contact form and asked her to be sure to blurt out and be accurate. Gradually, people rely more and more on her, and generally think she is more capable than the college students who just graduated. Even more amazing, because the American boss's English accent is heavier, the office of the People's Congress feel that he has a communication barrier, but she can use gestures and drawings to understand the boss's intentions. Exaggerated point, other employees and bosses can not communicate when they go to find her interpreter. She has been selected as "the most popular person in the office" for three consecutive years, and has been able to make simple daily conversations with foreigners, use computers to send emails, make forms, and pay for 4000/month as well as many college graduates for a year or two.
Another example of a boy: I am a French ignorant classmate summer trip to France, but also through the English + gesture + drawing of the way to order, ask the way, book hotels, bargain, eat fun good also handed a few local friends. His famous saying is "Throw me on the earth where anyone lives, I can live, and live better than the average person in the area." "I don't know how we look at it, but I think it's a very attractive man.
7. Have ideas, do not care about the views of others, do not admire vanity, do not compare. This does not start to say, the reason we all understand, really can do is how to get 30 years old after it.
when it comes to this, you may find that you are missing a very important two: appearance and ability (especially the ability to earn money).
Comparatively speaking, women are less picky about men than men and women, and the key is temperament is better. I think as long as there is no skin disease, have not been burned and other accidental injury, the appearance will not be ugly where to go. What we normally call "ugly looks" actually means bad temperament. The temperament is good, has the connotation mature man, no matter how the appearance will give the person very comfortable impression. and temperament, connotation of the training, and the former mentioned character, good mentality, reading more, experience deep is inseparable.
As for this ability to work ~ ~ ~ to meet all the previous conditions, integrity, diligence, intelligence, tolerance of men, coupled with a little opportunity, not to say that the uphold, life-well-off should be the problem is not big. And this has been able to meet the needs of good women for a safe life.
How many men, when young for career choice not to talk about love, after success (estimated to be thirty or forty years old bar) want to end single, enjoy beauty in the side, the children around the knee family life only to find that the romance is not a shopping mall, the strength of the not can not be found. Gold-digger women can not see, can not see the flowers have the Lord is not love money, their own advantages are completely out of play. Many wealthy people in the marriage, first put a net worth to attract beautiful women, but also asked others "not for the money but the value of his own", stating to do before marriage property notarization. Iraq also don't want to think, take out the money he is a portly head bald bald hypertension fatty liver plus don't play no taste lack of thought less connotation of half old man, people don't fancy his money still can fancy him what?
Some might say that, as I described before, the perfect man, in reality, does not exist. In fact, there are a few of my friends have the most of the above advantages, not very old (all in the 30-year-old), holding the salary of intimidated reasonably well (4000-8000), wife or girlfriend is also beautiful and gentle and intelligent, the weekend to play ball shopping street bubble bookstore to see the performance, the days have a good time. Of course, asking a man to be rich than Li Ka-shing Run Run, temperament and like Chow Yun-Fat Adam Cheng is not realistic. But if men can hold back the pursuit of wealth, to spare some time and energy to read the history of reading, self-cultivation, in order to ensure the smooth work at the same time and strive to improve their own quality, it should not be very difficult to do it. Some men say now that the woman's mind is empty and shallow, do you know that "eight people" is a rather than eight persons, the capital of Australia is Canberra instead of Sydney (also the capital of the United States is not New York), "flock" is a derogatory word can not be used, "Bed joys (zi, Chanchon) Huan" is not writing The bed of the first "?" (These are what people around me say they missed, especially the latter two are almost never seen.)
In fact, I also know that, at least for the "money" aspect, I say these are likely to have little effect. There will still be a lot of men, while shouting BS worship Diggers side scrambling wave upon wave to turn themselves into worship Diggers Idol. If they can accept material beauty is also considered Tiu Renderen, but other people's goal is a mother and wife ~ ~ ~ I do not understand why someone is clearly lack of zinc but kept to fill calcium. Maybe men need the security of money, too.
Four, the attention of the pursuit of MM
Tianya sometimes see someone to ask how to catch up with colleagues, classmates, a group of enthusiastic people rushes to suggest how to vindicate, date choose what place is better, date several times can try to hold hands, want to kiss others want not to obtain consent beforehand ... I think these can not be said to be unimportant, but all are "surgery" rather than "Tao". If you and she is not a country at all, like Zhang Fei chasing Lin mm, even if you look at more than what "36 of girls" also don't use AH. In my opinion, the key to a successful relationship is:
1. Determine your feelings for her on the basis of understanding
I do not know how many men see the right woman's first feeling is like Wei Xiaobao Alexia (the original text please refer to "Deer Ding kee") when that? Prince of a song fell in love with Cinderella, I know her beautiful and lovely apart from the heart pure, the book of the ceremony? There is no daily necessities in fiction fairy tale, love at first sight may not withstand the test of real life. I often hear the boy say "I fell in love with her at the first sight" and I knew it was the person I wanted when I saw her, and I felt naïve when I lamented its simplicity. "At first sight" at most is just good, is to appreciate, away from the acquaintance, Love is still far away. Really mature man in "love at first sight" after the idea is not "she is too beautiful and lovely, I must chase her hand", and should be "her shape is what I like, do not know other aspects (such as character, character, knowledge, values) How, we do not come together?" "
I have always believed that the true love of men and women does not come from blood and familiarity (such as parent-child love), worship (like groupies ' Love), morals and devotion (such as love for a profession), but must be based on mutual understanding. The appreciation, trust and respect are the prerequisites for understanding and cherishing and even being in love. So the first step in love preparation should be to collect as much information as possible from each other and get all the information from the chat to make sure that your eyes are correct.
2. Identify what type of person she likes (see article III above)
3. The most simple way to pursue: starting from a friend
Some boys worry that once the general friendship, and then "positive" I am afraid it is difficult, some people think that the girls can see the eyes of the girl is less, do not hurry up may be someone else first, but also some temperament straight, impatient to figure out the delicate minds of girls, look at the first time to vindicate, achievement can not pull down ~ ~ No matter how the other side of the situation, the burning show love can make girls secretly happy, vanity is greatly satisfied, and then moved with Hearts. But the real mature and wise woman in the move will inevitably gently sigh: so know soon to "oceans" "life" of the man, I am afraid it will not be a lifelong partner's preferred.
and start from a friend, from the daily chat slowly understand her full picture, found her hidden advantages and disadvantages, MS is the above "determine your feelings for her" the best way. The real beauty of this method is that you can be a friend of the identity without showing off with her to discuss some of the problems between lovers, such as "What kind of object to look for AH" "In fact, with the elderly live also very good ah, every day there are ready to eat, children do not have to ask the nanny to take" "now Dink family is very Do you have any plans to not have children after a lifetime of two people in the world ah "like, try not to reveal obvious tendencies, mainly listen to her ideas." If your parents are determined to live together after marriage, if you are married for two years to give her a grandson, these are to be explained before marriage and how much may be a bit hurtful, so try to determine the relationship before a test. If she chooses the world of two or doesn't want a child, then you can quietly go down. "Friends strategy" can not only detect the other person's true thoughts, but also save the face, both sides will not be embarrassed, especially suitable for office romances.
4. Common problems in love: What to do if the confession is rejected?
my point is, if she is not explicitly rejected (eg: sorry, I already have a boyfriend/favorite person, I really think we are not suitable), if you have been in harmony with each other, you may try again, let her see your feelings and determination. If her refusal is out of reserve or out of her mind, your confidence and attachment will likely impress her. Face is sometimes insignificant compared with lifelong happiness.
But, however, no matter how hard you try, how you use it, the end result may still be: she doesn't love you.
What do you do if the person you love doesn't love you?
Perhaps, also can only silently turn around, leave her a faded figure, also give oneself retain under the last little dignity and self-esteem.
only two words of Karen Mok's lyrics to all the once sad people:
"Efforts to love a person, and happiness is not related." "
"Although I get the world, some happiness, not mine." "
Five, the university boy's charm nurturance plan (to the physique, the connotation, the ability, the mentality development
the situation of the office workers are all aware that, on weekdays for the boss to do cattle horse, eat rice to bed a lie move also don't want to move, watch TV on the internet on the time is not early wash and sleep it. Weekend on the Internet at home to see the disk, and college classmates and friends drink wine, maybe also by the boss forced to add a class was the mother urges a pro, a blink of an eye two days no, where there is the idea of the reading of the history of spiritual cultivation?
Therefore, the content of this chapter is mainly for college boys, of course, work is not busy workers can also do reference. Many things will benefit in the future whether they are in the market or in the workplace if they can lay a good foundation in college. In front of a bunch of chasing mm strategy and tactics, I write not tired everyone looked tired. In fact, there is a shortcut-to the adult see people love flowers bloom young mm Idol ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ if there are many mm to you builders and even active, then I said that you will not use it ~ ~ ~ then you worry about is "the two girls are good, which is suitable for LP" or " Next time I had to say no to her, how can I make her not so sad "such a problem." Of course, to achieve this state, in addition to the innate conditions, early * * * is also indispensable.
1. Increase nutrition, do more exercise
stature is a lot of boy's dull pain, in the future job hunting, mate will inevitably be affected. In fact, before the age of 18, most girls ' bones are closed, while boys still have a lot of room to rise. As the saying goes, "23, leap up a leap". When I was a male classmate enrolled 1.71-meter, it is said that before going to the hospital to test the bone age results will not grow taller. But he is not superstitious, to himself ordered a supplement protein + calcium science recipes, play basketball every day, the next the next to the swimming pool 1000 meters a full stick for 3 years. Before graduation test height, he is 1 meters 76~~~ this 5 centimeters can be when really hard-won AH.
Many boys in adolescence nutrition intake is insufficient, high school in the book and very little time exercise, thus affecting the body development. Many of the college boys do not care about this, but with a resigned attitude, do not know this period to take some remedial measures is completely in time. Eat more soy products, eggs, drink more milk, often swim to play, most of the boys will grow taller.
2. Read more books and have a good book
I will not dwell on this point. Love reading nature is to hold up books such as drinking rain, do not love to read I said more is also mist over the ear. Just say: Reading is to shape a person's accomplishment, connotation, mentality, temperament of the shortcut, but also the best way to do the most, is to let people lifelong benefit habits. If someone wants to sit down and read some books, they don't know what to read. Then I (to the boys) The proposal is: Literature class 40% (including ancient poetry, contemporary novels, poetry, essays); History class 30% (if really do not want to read "kingdoms", "the capital of Governance Tong Jian", Read the "Three Kingdoms" "Wanli 15 years" also do, but too " The drama said "even if", economic, Political affairs category 30%. Professional books and successful motivational books are not included.
Reading also has a fringe benefit: expanding the conversation. and mm chat, "What are you reading recently" is definitely a decent and never outdated topic, and easy to open the situation. Then it can be "I just finished reading xxx very good, you take to see it." "As for the books between the men and women, return it ~ ~ ~ Hey, I don't need to say more."
and, if you have read enough books, you can also according to mm like the author of the preliminary judgement of her personality and preferences. Like Fang Fang, chili Girls Most of the more than the entry into the WTO, the character of a straightforward, Zhang, Wang Anyi's girls are a bit petty bourgeoisie complex (declaration is not derogatory AH), like nostalgia; Yu Qiuyu, Yi Zhongtian Girls ms Some depth, not a little girl full of flowers , and Love Jin Yong Cologne Liang Yusheng students have a forthright side of the character, sometimes behaved more neutral. If you like the MM usually see cotton cotton Wei hui Anne baby ~ ~ ~ I won't say anything.
3. Exercise Eloquence
This is often overlooked, and its role in social life can not be underestimated. The "eloquence" mentioned here mainly consists of three aspects.
a) standard of Putonghua. A clear and fluent Mandarin is just like a good word, in the first impression of leaving someone with a favorable feeling. Of course, "standard" does not mean to achieve a, a B, as long as the "clear and fluent" requirements, can express ideas smoothly.
b) Quick thinking and strong expressive power. Extensive reading, experience is rich is eloquence good "this" "source", but even if you Caigaobadou educated player, if not to organize language, lied words is not a sentence is in vain. It is recommended to participate in debates, seminars and other activities, and students to discuss issues, in this interaction to improve the language expression ability.
c) Can not think of the right words ~ ~ ~ Popular point is called "cheek thick" bar. When you do "some say" and "say", "Dare to say" is also very important. In the university every year there are "analog podium" activities, how many days of the day when the chi of the students on the stage, a red-handed began popping said no words. This is also to practice more, in the school to lose a few face, in the future to seek employment, mate may benefit from the extraordinary.
The following are the "plus sub-item", the importance of less than the previous three, but also may wish to try
4. Develop a "dominant feature"
compared to calligraphy, art, photography, chess and other "hidden features", singing, dance, instrumental music and ball games can be regarded as "dominant features." Often hear people say "I do not have the athletic talent" "I do not have that artistic".
still, as long as you want to learn, it's not too late to train in college. Here is one more example:
when we were in college, a guy across the hall was playing the flute on the balcony every evening, for 4 years. All the girls in our dorm have witnessed his performance from the beginning of the noise maker to the last stage of the graduation party. By contrast, the threshold for keyboard music is much lower. Also in the undergraduate, a boy and I learn piano, every day in the Piano room practice one hours, a year later can not play * * * Liszt could play Clayderman, can be bluffing amateur.
don't think it's "useless" to learn these things. Music and sports play an important role in the cultivation of human character and temperament. By contrast, "dominance" gives you more opportunities to "show Yourself" (and, of course, the opportunity to be favored by mm), helping you to adjust your mood when you're depressed, and to give you a bit more confidence.
5. Travel alone.
read the Million books, of course, still have to walk thousands of miles. I have always believed that the students must have a trip alone, to see "elsewhere" how people live, appreciate the hardships of "road difficult", but also test their own communication, stress, adaptation and problem-solving ability. My immediate feeling is that every time from afar back, mentality will have a little change, will be less impetuous and dissatisfaction with life, Tim a little about geography and the knowledge of the humanities, but also often in the journey to meet with this friend.
student time travel must be more difficult, sit all night hard seat, sleep 20 block of multi-room is commonplace. What is missing in this period is the "freedom" that is hard to regain after having a job. After the official work, then want to go out to travel I am afraid only in "51" "11" and after the spring Festival to "market". Wait until the talk of love, married and even do a father, "travel alone" is inevitably more extravagant hope.
6. Often on the forum, read more replies.
first of all, I am not the end of the world of childcare AH ~ ~ ~ Some dormitories have computer students hang on the internet all day, chat and play games, look at the news search images, can never think about the major sites of the forum to see. Ask their answers mostly "What's on that?" Trouble squalling so many "" other people's views and I have no problem. "
This reminds me of a less-than-flat word in this place: where is the lake?
we often say that college students "inexperienced", the university graduated into the workplace called "on the social", but this "world" "society" is what east, in the end where? Everyone speaking on the forum is not the real people in our lives, their ideas, not the people who live outside our circle, and the people around us under the mask of true feelings? It is not surprising that a person who only focuses on his inner world, who knows nothing about other people's ideas, is paranoid and frustrated in love.
of course, some people do not surf the internet, and even rarely read newspapers, still can be the world of sophistication human. But I still think that for college students with limited communication, the forum is a shortcut. Reading newspaper news (including the main post) can let you know "what happened", and from the reply you can learn "what other people think about it" "is my idea universal?" Not to mention the simply astounding classic responses I've retained, the perfect diversion for a depressing moment. By the way, the Tianya fashion section of young mm many, there are many discussions on marriage issues. You single GG If you can often go to see, in the psychological grasp of girls will certainly have a profit.
on the forum more than half a year, my psychological activities have been from the original "How so sick of this person" "really disgusting" evolved into a "Yi, MS has this idea of people still many." "In addition to the horizon is tempered mentality, improve the psychological quality of the excellent place, this earth people (Shang) know I will not explain ha ~ ~ ~
(to) Several suggestions for choosing a mate for a college man