When I was 985,211, I found I had nothing | Or, you can't say that.

It was a long time before I realized that the people who looked so bright were also feeling inferior in their hearts. This discovery is very accidental, is one time my genius roommate back, very very unhappy, lying on the table for a long time not up.


I'm playing with the furnace stone, I feel something wrong back to say you what. She looked up and said, hey, I found the gap between people so big. You do not know that I attend the discussion class today, has a female student to speak in English all is wonderful, so fluent, it is my turn to stuttered.


I said nothing you also quite good, every day come back to study, speech not, I can not test high score?


my very strong roommate said, not so, you know, not only English, the female growth is also particularly good-looking, makeup is also delicate, standing on the stage so shiny, bright light so I have to see not clear themselves. I said you how great ah, at least can also spell a full English speech, performance points and so good, every day also very hard, I envy you, not like me every day is rubbing furnace stone. She said, you are very powerful Ah, the article is well written, I have such a large public number, a girl to start their own business, like I have no special skills to learn. I have a wry smile, actually not ah, you do not know, sometimes I feel that in addition to the lucky on the Fudan University, really have nothing. I was serious at the time.





in fact, when I was in junior high school, I was very self-confident. Family conditions in our county is not bad, academic performance, English teacher just finished the text, under the class I can find her back out, grow like a small clever beans, math teacher also old in class Kua me, "Shang book is smart Ah." at that time did not study, the old comic can also test the whole school first, remember a cherry wood flower Road "I am a genius", the Big La La is written on the desk. Think, "Hey, I shouldn't be bad." " on the high school was dumbfounded, the examination of Hengshui one after the discovery is not so back." When I introduced myself, there was a boy standing on the podium, "I like maths, I have learned maths by myself", followed by a little girl, "not much reading, more like Heidegger." "One more, the whole body of the Artie Nike," I am a Shijiazhuang in a graduate, the National English speech several awards. "I lowered my head to look at his body Jordan, thought that also did not have what award, originally felt oneself to read more now Heidegger exactly is a who, finished, can only rely on the examination." Results The first exam came out, learned the college math buddy exam The whole school 60th, I took 600 away, feel that they did not seriously learn, began to work hard, next month exam results, 800, this last point of psychological defense has been breached. then began to inferiority. Deep and deep, the things that were so proud were all broken. found that they are not so smart, learning is not good, in addition to learning what can be praised? Think to find oneself is a small place out of, home also no money, oneself grow general, short hair not good-looking, no boy likes me, I like the boys like their class eloquence good long beautiful girl. So howl and cry, feel that they are useless. Psychological pressure is particularly large, but also headache, hengshui A is very important to study the results, so spelling the life of the study, think maybe admitted to the school before a few, admitted to Tsinghua University, can identify themselves.
Once watching the first lecture of the whole school, tears and my good friend said, "I want to like them, test a 700 points, to become such a star AH." " the results of 2.5, and did not pass the Tsinghua University, in fact, two choice problems, inferiority of the psychological problem has not been resolved, not the TTG of the Fudan."






you say it's a cruel thing to grow up. from a small town without a movie theater, the best high school in the whole of Hebei, six years later to come to the international Metropolis Shanghai, to pour out all my small savings, to reluctantly pay a down payment of Shanghai. I found that it is useless to test a good university. Family . Appearance. See. Network. Emotional quotient. Which one doesn't matter. You think you'll be able to say the same thing as your high school teacher in 985,211? The inferiority of my freshman sophomore, than in high school that time is also deep, found that there is a 10,000-dollar bag to buy not blink, found that there are Zooey to eat 500 of the restaurant per capita, found that there are 513 days a small holiday to go abroad to play a trip, found that there is such a person, learning not to say it, look good, look good, and boyfriend, Have a boyfriend, character is also so good, envy envy, hate not up each other, can only hate themselves. Feel that they are finished eggs, hard what, and then hard to afford to buy a house in Shanghai, the people of Shanghai Aboriginal students have two sets of home. Do not want to learn, the results plummeted, the more self-abased more do not want to move, the more don't want to move more inferiority, the more self-abased also want to blame themselves, what, old feel bad family conditions. Home my father asked me: "On the university is loose, you have a good time?" " I said," not happy, than in high school when also not happy "my family relatives in the next smooth things over," our family on your one child admitted to such a good university, can give old fan Jia to make up, can also have what not happy. " You do not know, in fact, the more difficult to climb, the more you see more pain, the more down, only to find that their original is not so good, the more in the high place, every step of walking to walk with fear and tread." you always feel good university children there is no trouble, you can have a good job, in fact, is not so, sentient beings are bitter, who has a ruler in mind, the amount of their own quantity of others, are not taste.









I was humbled and miserable at that time, what do not want to do, go home also eat meal, every day really is crying, daze, my parents advised me, listen not to go in, once hated their own not to live up, hate their various bad, listen to my parents advised me, suddenly came to a sentence, "What do you give birth to me ah, I am so bad, is a waste, How many adults are you throwing away? "my dad was red at the time, more than 40-year-old upright a North man, from small to large did not see him cry, while tears aside said,"Yes, mom and Dad are not capable of, wronged you, Mom and dad did not promise." "I just don't think I'm a fucking thing. And who's gone? What, is life hard? What, are you so damn useless? What, oh patronize to see other people shiny, despise themselves, and the contempt of your family? how lucky we are and how hard we are. Junior High School, and I like, very clever boys, because can't afford hengshui tuition, read an ordinary high school, now after repetition, reluctantly read a one.
if not, have been trying to now, I can not from a very small county, the way to the Fudan University, finally and the beginning of the starting line than I was very former classmates, stood on a stage. I have junior high school students, read the secondary school, married people, gave birth to a child, led to one months of 2000 dollars in wages, I feel very sorry, and a little bit very shameful lucky. it is because of the ability to get such a ticket, there is the opportunity to see these shiny people, and understand their shortcomings. can and oneself to pass, know oneself where is bad, can have the impetus that move forward. But do not be so twisted, everyone has the hardship of everyone, but the world than you are more difficult than your unfortunate people, too. You are fine. Everyone is inferior, inferiority is normal. Can't afford to buy a room is not you do not work hard pot, is the society is too fucked up. But we still have to work hard, always care about, tens of thousands of those who do not have you lucky, in the event of a little bit of our efforts, can change the rules of the game, can change the ruined housing prices? There is still a dream to have.





Everyone who looks shiny is not confident, and everybody is not confident. I write a copy, see people University Long "atypical 985", empathy, and then sigh, you can not afford to buy a room, but the article written much good ah, I can't write. yesterday sent a solicitation, "you in Fudan why inferiority" did not think of the fire, found that the original people really. All anxious, all inferiority. anxiety is supposed to be vented. Also to be eased. We comfort each other. a little girl said to me when I was finishing my backstage submission.


"from the small urban-rural integration Department √no special features √I thought I would not learn anything, but I didn't even learn .the face is blind and I don't know how to make a pot friend.


for a moment I seemed to see myself. How did I get back? I said, a lot of people better than you, that is the truth, but not necessarily all his own excellent, family Ah, see Ah, 20 accumulation, sometimes there is no way. But you have nothing, a man alone, a mighty army to kill out, the test came here, finally and these excellent people stand on a starting line, you are very powerful. to see a sentence, a person to reach the height, not to see his current height, is to see how much he has advanced in the original height. I was very proud of the moment I sent it out.

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When I was 985,211, I found I had nothing | Or, you can't say that.