Product managers should pay more attention to EQ

Some time ago, the United States published an authoritative survey that found that nearly 20 years to the average IQ of successful people in the U.S. political and business world is moderate, but the emotional quotient is high. In social psychologists ' minds, the key to a person's success is 20%, and the other 80% comes from other factors, the most important of which is emotional intelligence, the EQ. EQ is composed of 15 elements, namely:

Le group sex, refers to is good at, willing to work with colleagues, stability, refers to people are not moody;

Strength, refers to the ability to find their own strengths, firmly stand up;

Excitability, refers to the easy to enter the state;

Persistence, refers to the consistent;

Dare for sex, refers to the can-do, not to be indecisive;

Sensitivity, refers to the emotional changes of others, the need for moderately sensitive;

Skepticism refers to being good at presenting questions;

Fantasy, refers to like imagination, dare to imagine, full of imagination;

Sophistication means knowing a lot;

Anxiety refers to knowing your weaknesses;

Experimental, refers to the ability to do a strong hands;

Independence, refers to the emotional independence;

Self-discipline refers to the strong self-discipline ability;

Nervousness refers to the ability to act quickly when resources are limited.

The founder of the success of Napoleon Hill, in his study of the key factors for success, proposed a PMA Golden law: If a person is highly emotional and positive, he will succeed in half. The so-called emotional quotient (emotionalquotient) is relative to IQ (IQ), it is a kind of index to measure and describe the emotion and emotion of people, including the self-control of emotion, the coordination ability of interpersonal relationship, the endurance of frustration, the degree of self understanding and the understanding and tolerance of others. Psychology thinks, who can control mood, conquer mood, who can have special wisdom and achievement a career. The more Wang hardships, Han Xin endure Shiching, Deng Xiaoping three fell three, are emotional quotient in support of its will completion. Work is also common to this phenomenon: Some leadership IQ is very high, good judgment, but also know the specific operation process, but often mediocre, nothing; Investigating its foundation, EQ is an important factor. People who can develop their emotions upward are the EQ. A good EQ can make a person understand their feelings, control impulse and anger, rational work, in the face of various tests to maintain calm and optimistic attitude, can be in the sense of self emotion and also understand the feelings of others, and on the basis of assessment and analysis, the emotional maturity of the adjustment, so that their own constantly adapt to the changes in the external environment.

Later, the United States "New York Times" Science columnist, psychologist Daniel German 1995 has summed up the "emotional quotient" five aspects, more conducive to people's understanding of EQ and the promotion of emotional quotient.

Self-awareness. That is, when a feeling arises, you can perceive it. This ability is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence. People who have a better understanding of their emotions are better at mastering their own lives. As long as we practice hard, we can have a sharper sense of our intuition. For example, a man who had an unpleasant experience annoyed for hours. He may not know that he is irritable until someone reminds him and ya find out. If he could perceive his own reaction, he would be able to rule his emotions as soon as possible. Mastery of feeling can become the Master of life, in the face of learning, work and other life events can have a choice.

Master the mood. As with good mood, bad mood adds spice to life, the key is to keep balance. We are often unable to control ourselves when we are emotionally agitated. But we can decide how long that mood will be. Anger seems to be the hardest to cope with in all sorts of moods that everyone wants to avoid. There's a car on the road that suddenly plugs in front of your car. Your reaction may have been in the heart of the Dark Scold: "Bastard!" almost hit me! I can't let him run away. The more you want to get angry, the more you may lose your mind and drive recklessly. How can you make yourself angry? A more effective approach is to "re-evaluate", that is, consciously from a more positive point of view to look at something again. Take the driver as an example, you can tell yourself: "He may have an emergency." Another effective way is to walk alone and calm down. If you're too angry to think straight, it's especially useful to calm down. There is also a safer way to exercise, for example, to go for a walk for a while. In addition, deep breathing and meditation are also sharp weapons against bad moods.

Self excitation. Experts on the Olympic players, world-class musicians and chess masters have done research, found that these outstanding characters have a common feature: can inspire their own hard work. To motivate yourself to strive for success, you must first have clear goals, and a "world without difficulty" optimism. When a pessimist is rejected, he may be sorry for himself: "I am a loser and I will never do a business in my life." The optimistic person would be like this: "Maybe I used the wrong way." "OR:" It happened that the customer was in a bad mood. "Optimists blame failure as an objective environment rather than themselves, thus motivating themselves to keep working." You are optimistic or pessimistic, may be born, but as long as willing to work hard to practice, pessimistic people can learn to be more cheerful. To maintain a high degree of enthusiasm is the driving force of all achievements, that is, constantly set goals for themselves, continuous progress, which in the process of personal success is a very important factor.

Control Impulse. Walter Mischell, a psychologist who began his experiments in a kindergarten in Stanford University in the 60, proved the importance of this ability to success. In the experiment, the researchers told the children that they could take a marshmallow immediately, but if they could wait until the researchers had done something, they could take two tablets. Some of the children took them at once, and the rest were there for a long 20 minutes. In a follow-up survey, those who were four years old to wait 20 minutes for more than one sugar were able to temporarily restrain their preferences in order to reach their goals. They are more mature, more decisive, and more adept at overcoming setbacks in life. On the contrary, those anxious to take a candy child to the teen stage, most of the more stubborn, indecisive and easy to stress.

Relationships。 It is very important to feel and understand people when you get along with others. We often unknowingly send or accept emotions. Tes Kelly and Jeannette Kaplan's research in Bell's lab shows how important good interpersonal skills are. The lab staff were either engineers or scientists and scored high on academic IQ tests. But some of them are outstanding, some are mediocre. Why is that? It turns out that those who have outstanding performance, their interpersonal relationships are very good, a wide range of friends. "Mediocre people who meet technical difficulties will call technical experts from all sides and wait for them to respond, but often can't wait and waste their time," Kelly found. And those who have accomplished great things rarely experience this. Because they have established a reliable network of people, when he wants to find someone, always soon have the answer. ”

At present, we have many leaders believe that people who can take leadership positions should be EQ, without the ability to deal with the relationship between the top and bottom, it is unlikely to embark on leadership positions. This kind of interpersonal relationship coordination ability equates to the sentiment quotient the view is biased, refuses to carry on including the emotion self-control, the interpersonal relations coordination strength, the setback endurance, the ego understanding degree as well as to other people's understanding and the tolerance and so on the intelligence quotient synthesis enhancement, is difficult to have too much. Emotional quotient of the high and low, there are congenital factors, but also with the efforts of the day after tomorrow. A leader who aspires to create brilliance must constantly upgrade his emotional quotient. I remember a few years ago I read from a "leadership work Research" magazine that a writer wrote "Leadership: To enhance your EQ," he provided four ways to cultivate EQ, we should learn from.

Promote EQ in learning practice. Learning is an important way to acquire knowledge. Leaders should improve their political quality through continuous learning. Scientific quality and humane quality, temper good psychological quality, so as to effectively improve their knowledge structure, improve their comprehensive quality, in order to in the complex environment, can quickly and rationally adjust their mentality and emotions, calm, calm, resolute analysis, Solve the problems encountered in order to constantly improve their emotional quotient. To do: stable, capable, cherish words, philosophical, let colleagues respect, let subordinates obey, make oneself in the cause of the road in an invincible position. At the same time, we should pay attention to promote their emotional quotient in practice. Practice is also a kind of learning, and leaders should be good at achieving the goal of "inner strong quality and external tree image" through practice. Strong quality, is to consciously hone their own character, to cultivate their own conduct, and constantly improve their moral standards; outside the tree-like, is to be healthy mentality, realistic style, and constantly standardize their own behavior, so that the superior and not arrogant, to show respect for the subordinate rashness, to show love. The actual action in exchange for others to their own dependence and support, strengthen the emotional quotient of internal and external base.

Promote EQ in sincere listening. Listening is a learning and a quality. A man's listening, like his speech, can clearly show his attitude towards others. British expert Robert · T. Oliver once said: "To the true master of communication, listening and speaking are interrelated, like the warp and weft of a cloth." When he listens, he is standing in the doorway of his companion's mind. "Therefore, listening should give the speaker a positive influence and enable him to support him in translating ideas of various meanings into words, thus making the other person chest and respected." To the leader, listening is not only a technical problem, but also an attitude problem, not only the process of acquiring general information, but also the process of infiltrating "emotion into". To be a loyal listener is an effective way for leaders to promote EQ, and it is the important psychological foundation of "getting the people" and the important aspect of implementing effective leadership. A leader can sit down, frankly with the subordinate to chat, listen to the voice of subordinates, and lower exchange of ideas, which in itself is a perception of other people's emotional and psychological blending process, is to win the support of the subordinate actively important means. To this end, listen to pay attention to do: first, to be correct attitude, to express the desire to listen, so that the speaker feel comfortable, and loyal to the other side of the topic, overcome the casual, self flaunt, perfunctory and other bad habits, and really feel the sensitivity of subordinates, considerate of other people's ideas and Second, good at mobilizing each other's speech enthusiasm, from time to point to ask questions to consult the tone of the exchange of views, to acquiesce to the way to express recognition, and constantly stimulate the other side speech desire, make it feel that they are being valued. Third, pay attention to the art of listening, or to insert a few words or body language to assist, look at each other, nod, inquiries and so on. In short, through effective listening, feel the other person's heart, dissolve each other's emotions.

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promotes emotional quotient in interpersonal relationships. The correct handling and coordination of interpersonal relationship is one of the important indicators to measure the strength of a leader, and also the key factor to measure the emotional quotient of a leader. Carnegie pointed out: "A person's success, only 15% rely on his professional knowledge, and 85% rely on his good interpersonal and social skills." "This argument has its limitations, but on the other hand it illustrates the importance of interpersonal relationships." and interpersonal relationship is to a great extent the management of self emotion and the management of other people's emotions an activity. Emotion, as the inner experience, arises from the conformity of objective things with the subjective needs of human beings. If objective things can meet the needs of people, it will produce positive emotional experience, such as joy, anger, hatred, sadness, fear, and vice versa. Therefore, leaders need to improve emotional quotient by harmonizing interpersonal relationships to manage their own emotions. Because interpersonal relationship is an interactive behavior, the motives and emotions of others depend to a great extent on our own motives and emotions, other people's emotional generation and control is mainly other people's business, but you can feel the feelings of others, can use your own emotions to affect other people's emotions. For example, the superior to your criticism, if you are busy defending, he may speak more and more angry, but if you control your emotions, let him know you are listening carefully, his anger is reasonable, his mood will ease. You can then control your emotions to control the emotions of others and then change the emotions of others. The management ego emotion, mainly includes the understanding ego emotion, the adjustment ego mood, the control ego emotion and so on. To the leader, it is to be done: In the fury of the time, not in charge, in ecstasy, I make anger, I am in front of the public hi. Only in this way can we constantly improve our EQ, enhance the rationality of our leaders, and be more objective in observing and dealing with the problems, so as to keep the working style of seeking truth from facts.

To promote emotional quotient in social consciousness. "Social perception" is the first concept that American psychologist Bruno launched in 1947 in perceptual research. The so-called social consciousness, mainly is to the person (including to the person and to oneself) the consciousness, including to the person's role consciousness, the psychological consciousness, the behavior consciousness as well as the emotion consciousness and so on. In the social existence, the emotion consciousness is in the more important position, because the emotion decides the interpersonal intercourse the way and the degree, affects the work process. and the quality of the leader's EQ restricts the degree of social consciousness. People with high EQ qualities, to be able to perceive the needs of others from a variety of subtle information, decipher the inner world of others, effectively adjust and improve the relationship between the two sides, enhance their psychological compatibility, and easy to come out from the shadow of emotion, back on the career track. People with low emotional IQ often need to engage with low emotions and are not easy to win, thus affecting the smooth development of work. To promote emotional quotient, the leader must set up correct social consciousness. One is to be fully aware of other people's senses. A leader knows others, except from his words and appearances. More important is to observe his expression (such as speech expression, facial expression, body expression), and the motives behind these external emotions, the need to make reasonable judgments and speculation, to form a comprehensive understanding to understand their ideas, grasp their needs, and to mobilize the emotions of others accordingly. Second, self-awareness should be accurate. The leader's self-awareness mainly manifests itself in the observation of self external behavior and the understanding of self internal consciousness. Leaders in self-awareness, due to the cognitive factors and their own motives, needs, desires and other psychological factors, their own understanding and evaluation is difficult to be appropriate. Therefore, in their own introspection and valuation of the premise, but also through others to understand themselves, and open-minded to listen to the views of the masses, so that self-awareness can effectively guide their words and deeds, so as to promote self eq. Third, we should pay attention to overcoming all kinds of prejudices in social consciousness. For example, the first cause effect, proximate effect, halo effect, set effect, and so on, they all affect the leader's perception to the person, it is easy to cause the disharmony between the subject and object, and thus influence the promotion of the leader's EQ.

"EQ means having enough courage to face the challenges that can be overcome, enough metrics to accept insurmountable challenges, and enough wisdom to tell the difference," said Lee. "Reading a number of well-known scholars on the promotion of emotional quotient theory of the essence, enrich the ego, enhance self-confidence, permeated with enthusiasm, cultivate emotional quotient, to maintain the sun, this may be a great wisdom and inexhaustible life vitality."