The interpretation of humorous language 2014 major events in the IT field

Source: Internet
Author: User
Keywords nbsp we ourselves have been
Tags activity analysis android antivirus software app apple apple pay application

Every week, the upbeat Phil Johnson helps to deliver important news and headlines in the tech world in a relaxed and enjoyable way.


--Boss, to be on the safe side, the IT department elves suggest you update your antivirus software and move Kim Jong-un from the "Bad Boy" list to the "Good Boy" list.

December 24--Santa Claus gets a lesson from Sony

For years, it has been thought that the most wanted gift for the North Korean leader during the Christmas season is a sock briquettes. But after the Sony was hacked this year, people suddenly found that a film alluding to North Korea is enough to make such a big noise from the technical level, so this time Santa Claus may have to be smart, for Kim Jong-eun to prepare some of his real favorite gifts. After all, the elves are hooping in making toys, but their IT security capabilities are probably not as good.


--xbox, get the candles on the spot.

December 19--xbox One is not omnipotent

Just last weekend, my little nephew showed me how great an entertainment product the Xbox One is-especially what it allows users to do with voice commands. While this kind of functionality sounds really good and fascinating, there are always things we can do in the world, especially in the good times. But to be honest, if the Xbox One can make me move my mouth and set up the Christmas, I'd really like to buy it.


Smart Christmas tree Family, in order: IOS, Android and Windows

December 12--We want the Android tree, you moron!

If you're still immersed in the love of a non-"intelligent" Christmas tree that has been with us since childhood, then I'm going to bring some bad news: Smart Christmas trees have come to life. But most of the friends who buy home are certainly those stupid, motionless but timeless classics of the real trees, and in the lifetime do not intend to make any changes in this respect. But the times are always moving forward, believing that in the near future we are not going to be spruce, pine or fir, but iOS, Android or Windows. But I wonder what kind of Christmas tree Charlie Brown would choose as the owner of Snoopy.


I found that I was a "bad boy" this year, starting with the traditional criteria. But my advanced Behavioral analysis program gives different conclusions.

December 3--Big data makes Santa feel a big headache

In the midst of a wave of technology that has been in the process of putting everything in its own hands for some time, I can say that it is an out-and-out champion. For example, I've written an article about how big data can help business employers identify better programmers more accurately. But we have to face reality, and sometimes people's reliance on data analysis is overdone. Athletic Athletics is the best example, and it seems to me that things are starting to deviate from the track. For example, do we really need to use the advanced analysis mechanism to calculate the target of the catcher's motion? I hope that in determining who is a good child, who is a bad child, Santa can try to avoid the hierarchy analysis mechanism, continue to use a warm heart to judge all this.


All right, let's reaffirm the basic principle of gratitude: it is strictly forbidden to discuss sensitive topics in the field of mobile operating systems.

November 26--How to spend Thanksgiving in peace and harmony

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and in this day of the year countless families gather together with their friends and family, sitting at the table at the feast to discuss topical topics. But in order to ensure that this good moment is not destroyed by quarrels or even roars, please do not introduce sensitive and contentious content-especially mobile operating systems. Of course, unless you have a exclusively iOS party, an Android party or a BlackBerry party in your home, it may be (albeit a small chance) that everyone uses Windows Phone. You know, it's purely a security concern.


--I don't care what Abby's supercomputer has petajoules computing power. Anyway, want to buy a new computer?

November 21--Now everyone dreams of having petajoules computing power.

This week's news about supercomputers is like a wave to everyone. The most striking of all, of course, is that the United States has officially signed two contracts to build a new supercomputer, with the goal of raising the ability to exceed 300000 trillion times to snatch the crown of the world's strongest supercomputers from China. The more you read this article, I've become more convinced that one day everyone will have a computing device that can reach the petajoules level--if everyone is an IT practitioner like me, and there's a teenager at home, I'm sure I can understand how I feel ...



--MMM ... The oldest software bug ever? No, no, this is really the most annoying bug, but it's not the oldest.

November 14--even antivirus software won't help us deal with the dreaded "paper clips."

Earlier this week, Microsoft finally fixed a server security vulnerability-A vulnerability that, in fact, had been with us since the Windows 95 era. So is this the oldest or longest-standing bug in Microsoft's history? Of course, but although the flaw is really serious, I will not call it the worst software problem in Microsoft's history. This resounding name should belong to a Windows "feature" of the 90 's. The good news is that Microsoft eventually fixes it-the dreaded "paper clips".


--Honey, look what I found--the mechanical clock that needs to be tuned manually.

--er ... Really?!

Whoa, mom, what's that?

November 7-technology makes dads useless

Once upon a time, in fact, not long ago, daylight saving time (that is, 1 hours on the clock from 2 o'clock in the morning East 11th) is a good chance for us to be dads (especially dads who don't usually have a chance to do housework) to prove their worth--yes, we need to manually tune Let the children look up to their hero with reverence. It was only last week, however, that I suddenly found that such a good opportunity was gone forever. Thanks to the ubiquitous technology, now cable TV set-top box, mobile phone, thermostat and even a variety of devices are equipped with the ability to set the clock function. Oh, I'm really glad that the smoke detectors in the house occasionally need to change batteries, or my wife will drive me out of the house.


Dad, you're a great cook, but I put it on. Can I see the video online?

October 31-Pumpkin is still not included in the Internet of Things

According to my personal feeling, almost everything is trying to squeeze into the internet of things. It seems that no matter what the intrinsic function of the object is, as long as we can't see it on Netflix or YouTube, it becomes worthless--the most typical example is mobile phones, game consoles and even smart watches. To tell you the truth, I think it will not be long before we can see the card house with Pumpkin head.


Well, Sir, let's pay in cash this time, all right?

October 24--apple Pay this comprehensive on-line!

Apple pay has been officially released this week, and, unsurprisingly, its initial stage is not yet smooth. Of course, in the promotion of a new type of mechanism, the emergence of technical failures is inevitable, especially in the early stages of development. Of course, there are also some man-made factors, and people--especially those born in the millennium--suddenly find themselves needing to accept a new form of payment that has never been seen before. The resulting confusion is naturally predictable.


--please state that I have just sent you the six-digit digital verification code to verify your identity, after verification, we can start blind date. In addition, I also need you to provide the restaurant we are going to score on the comments site.

October 17--The first step in love is ... Authentication

Not so long ago, most of the messages I received were sent by family members or relatives and friends. Today, however, most of the text messages on my phone have become authentication services, and these numbers can help me verify the identity and identity of the identities in some websites or applications. As more and more web data leaks (or some other so-called leaks) get out of the headlines, I'm starting to stick with the two-factor authentication system as much as I can. When is this kind of situation? I don't know, but I'm glad I'm married.


Erotic Pottery Shop: Minors are not allowed to enter

-That's great! I can't wait to see what exciting stuff is going on in the neighborhood store ads on Facebook!

October 10 Facebook became increasingly dirty

The situation comes from Facebook's renewed disrespect for our privacy-yes, Facebook. It appears that Zuckerberg is plotting to launch a new feature that allows local businesses to send ads to users close to their location. So please be careful the next time you pass the Red light district--or at least from a security standpoint, temporarily send off the positioning service on your mobile device. Of course, you can also choose to completely away from these filthy places, in short, do not find yourself trouble.


--Dad, look, I've folded a crane for you!

Help! My iphone 6 Plus is missing?! Is anyone watching?

October 3--Children 10 percent, the iphone bends

Today, many friends are no stranger to the "crooked door"--in fact, this is what happened to Apple's new big-size iphone 6 Plus. Users find this model particularly easy to bend in their daily lives. Although this is old news a few weeks ago, there are still a lot of media like to take it out to mention. I haven't bought the iphone 6 Plus (I'm still insisting on using my 5S), so I'm not concerned about this kind of news. But if I do have one, I will certainly try to be careful not to mix it with the children's handmade and artistic creations. Careful makes the boat.


--My God, they're looking for a lot of rogue cell phone signal towers.

You made this tree look a little strange ah?!

September 26--a security threat lurking in the bushes

The news this week is a little odd, even unthinkable: the security handset makers in Washington, D.C., found 18 rogue cell phone towers that could intercept users ' cell phone signals. But things didn't stop there, and people soon found another 17 rogue towers in other parts of the United States. For some reason, people outside the technical field don't seem to be paying much attention to the news, but I am personally alarmed and curious about how many of these devices have yet to be discovered. Who knows where the next malicious interception activity is going to take place? To be on the safe side, I think I'll stick with the fixed-line business-not waver for a short time.


I find space rentals really not a good idea.

September 19--building a space taxi is really easier said than done

This week NASA's big news said it had signed a total of nearly $7 billion trillion of contracts with Boeing and SpaceX to build and run a space rental project designed to transport American astronauts between the International Space Station and the Earth. As an advocate of high concern for aerospace technology, it seems to me to be a great news. The advent of the project means that we do not have to buy rocket tickets from Russia to move freely between the earth and the space station. But to be fair, the term "rent" also gives the project a lot of weight in my mind, because it brings up other negative impressions of my mind, such as narrowness, squalor, and danger. But overall, I believe that NASA can solve these long-standing problems.


——...... If you are going to put your iphone 6 Plus into your pants pockets, please rush to buy our freshly baked big-bag "apple trousers"!

September 12-Apple becomes a new threat to Levi's jeans

As you know, Apple's iphone 6, which was finally sold this week, did use the after 4.7-inch big-screen design. If the size is not satisfactory, Apple also announced the iphone 6 Plus is equipped with an astonishing 5.5-inch large screen. Given that everyone seems to want to go out happily with their new iphone and show off with their friends, I think Apple is really missing the business-they should be selling their peripheral products further, with their oversized trouser pockets designed to accommodate the next generation of iphones. From an inherent impression, Apple is unlikely to overlook such a lucrative opportunity. In any case, I believe that these products will certainly bring good benefits.


--That's it--we're done! As soon as I call the limousine with Uber, I'll go to the airport and never see you again!

--Wait, honey--I got a request from Uber to send a passenger to the airport ...

September 5--The breakup made Uber awkward.

As the saying goes, it's not easy to break up. Today, however, the difficulty of breaking up has increased further, thanks to the Internet, social media and other similar technologies – it is really hard for us to completely exclude our former partners from our lives. The current Uber and other services also let the feelings of the rupture of both sides encounter more embarrassing situation. Alas, 10 years ago, the breakup is not a burst of crying and a few slap on the thing-life is really more and more complex ~


Mr. Engineer, I actually prefer the term "delivering food as service".

August 29--stop calling them "delivery boys".

I do not know if I am the only one, or we all think so, but I do think that the term "service" has been a bit rampant in recent times. Thanks to the full spread of cloud computing, we have become accustomed to the notion that software is Service (SaaS), Infrastructure as Service (IAAS), and platform as a service (PAAs). All of this is commendable, but the new "service" type of service has sprung up. Earlier this week, when I read the article, I found the back-end service (BAAS), at least for me this is a new thing. In addition, I have found many other types of cloud services, including network as a service (for short Naas), monitoring as a service and communication as a service (CAAS). When is this condition the stature? I'm afraid no one knows the answer.


-OK, now turn around and cough and tell me your mother's maiden name.

August 22-turn around, cough and authenticate

According to the news we have just received this week, hackers from China have just stolen 4.5 million of cases from the community health system, and this is just one of the many data stolen (or lost) by American medical institutions during the 2014. Why are hackers so interested in the personal health data of ordinary people? There is a theory that there is a market for this kind of information, and that there is probably no one outside the medical insurance institution that can make a profit by identifying the patient's identity. No one knows if this is true, but for the sake of insurance, medical workers should try to check the true identity of the person they are communicating with. It is a crisis-filled era, but prudence is not a bad thing.


You look so stupid in high school!

Who allowed Markeberg to steal our old albums?

It's obviously me ... As long as the Facebook Messenger app is installed, it's going to happen sooner or later.

August 15 Facebook Messenger is more intrusive than we thought.

It seems that every one or two months, Facebook jumps out and publishes a lot of terms of service (seemingly terms) and waves on the internet-a trend that has recently become increasingly frequent. The latest example is the chaos of application protocols that surround Facebook Messenger, the new application. Some people quickly uninstall or even simply refuse to install, because the app gets all the information about the user-including photos, contacts, text messages, location information, and so on. But most of the people are still in a stable mood, thinking that this is not enough trouble, too much worry is purely ADO. Personally, I'm more inclined to do the same, but I still have fun with Facebook and hooded one.


-Yes, I'm sure our girl accidentally threw out the braces without a matching application. Come in and help us find it!

August 8-No, no matching applications available

Almost every activity we've done in the last few years has a corresponding application. At least my personal feeling is this. But as the cartoon above says, there are still things that apps can't do for us, like when my daughter puts her braces in a restaurant and then gets thrown into the dumpster by the waiter and helps us find them. Long story short, I really climbed into the tin box for a while, but unfortunately still nothing. Perhaps the application developed in this context can really help her to realize the problem before she loses something next time? I look forward to the development of the situation ...


You call this rubbish a runny egg?

--linus Torvalds Scold What, we just point what.

July 31--linus Toravlds a curse, the masses are excited

This week's tech-savvy Linus Torvalds, the legendary founder of Linux and Git, is also a superb but mouth giant jet. As a person who never begrudge his own saliva and extreme emotions, Torvalds found a bug in the recently released GCC compiler. Although he made a very professional comment on the bug's official report, his personal email to the members of the Linux kernel inbox was somewhat ... Uh, random--or "adult." Like everyone's impression, Torvalds is not stingy with anger and bluster about any minor mistakes that appear in his technical world. We can only imagine how he would treat such problems in real life in a way that is insane.


--I know it's the system administrator day, but that's just too much.

Thank you for everything you've done for us, your majesty.

Where do you think these spices fit?

July 25--In the system administrator's Day, please be nice to them

Happy system Administrator section! Please face the reality, the system administrator is our office superhero, without their daily work is not normal to carry out. Of course, on this day we have to take the time to show our love and warm up to the cutest people who protect the network and email servers from the normal functioning of computers and print devices. If you have the idea of giving gifts to them, click here to get a little inspiration. Of course, you can also write a poem (or a narrative dance) to express your feelings of gratitude. But things went too far to be bad, so please try your best to control your state.


--comcast never accept a negative answer.

July 18--comcast Company is reluctant to let you go

When you find that some fixed-network customer service has become so bad, don't forget to read this week's technical columnist Ryan Block's real situation when he tried to unsubscribe from the Comcast service. The problem, which should have simply been a brief call, was eventually turned into a bitter and painful La breakup. When the block communicates with a customer service representative, the other person says nothing to accept the negative answer presented by the former. Fortunately, Block records most of the conversation, and interested friends can listen to them. The representative eventually helped block the fixed-network service, but even if Comcast to send people in the block's driveway to "deep in love," the shape of John Cooper's big form of loyalty, I would not be surprised.


--Yes, he must come with us, for the meal was raised.

Who is responsible for a foot massage for me after dinner?

July 11--The public are starting to lose their appeal

The news barely got any resistance on my personal favorite technology news list this week: one guy managed to raise 40,000 dollars (up to now) on the Kickstarter with a potato salad. If someone had previously suspected that the public-raised approach had begun to get a little out of control, I would have to say that after this incident, the mechanism would have been eliminated. And my favorite part of the story is the idea of the initiator's sense of humour: as long as the first aid is given, everyone is entitled to a taste of their freshly baked potato salad. Now the food door has been officially opened, I am very curious about what will be niuguisheshen in the public areas of continuous emergence-and please entertain the mentality of attention.


What, boy, have you seen such a wonderful fireworks show before?

--I don't think it's wonderful to have you upgrade your OS on Mom's iphone.

July 3--The home of small IT experts to ignite their own "fireworks"

Tomorrow is the July 4 Independence Day, which means that the ordinary people of every state in the United States will enjoy the spectacular fireworks display. In fact, I am not too interested in the fireworks (yawning), and in all fairness, the Boston side of the fireworks show no matter how wonderful fantasy, also compared to me in the home IT support work caused by the warm atmosphere. I was updating the iOS system on my daughter's iphone 4s, and the resulting screen was suddenly distorted. After a while, I spent the whole night to tinker with the gadget, hoping to help her recover her photos and contact information. The accident made me realize the importance of timely backup is even necessary.


-Well, I've apologized and helped you wash your car. Now, can you get me back to cable TV?

-Give me another glass, watch the mood

July 27--Prepare to kneel, you traitors.

The U.S. Supreme Court this week made a number of rulings on major technical programs. One of them is that the police must obtain a search warrant before they can view the personal cell phone. In addition, another lower-paying verdict is that the Aereo TV service violates copyright law. This amounts to a death sentence for Aereo and similar services, which may well mean that some users will return to the arms of cable television. Of course, I believe that cable companies will welcome these precipice prodigal in a warm embrace.


Hey, did you just sneak a peek at that guy?

No, I swear!

She is!

July 19--Watch out! Fire mobile phone know where your eyes fall

This week, Amazon finally unveiled its long-advertised smartphone product, Fire. This mobile phone has the so-called dynamic perspective function, this set of head tracking system is located in the front of the mobile phone face Four corners of the four front camera to grasp the user's real-time movement. With these cameras, the phone can keep abreast of where the user's head is turning.

Fire mobile phones Use the technology to dynamically determine where the user is currently viewing the phone (including pictures, maps, and so on). It sounds good, but the first thing that comes to mind for a guy I'm used to being pessimistic is that the technology may be used for some negative uses. Of course, I'm probably just being alarmist, right?


Your video content is loaded too slowly because Verizon is a pile of rubbish.

-To be honest, this tip is better than most Netflix videos.

July 13--netflix and Verizon start to heat up

The dispute between Netflix and Verizon has started to heat up quickly! First, Netflix's users of Verizon network Services stressed that Verizon's streaming media quality was a mess. After that, Verizon took up legal weapons to counter it, threatening to sue the other party if it did not withdraw the relevant information. Netflix is (basically) saying love. As a Netflix customer with little or no good streaming content in the service (I haven't seen the women's prison play, so there's really nothing to watch for), I have to say the next thing is more entertaining than the video itself! I can't wait to see what interesting comments the two will reveal later.


-This is your personal doctor-if you eat more pie, it will be alerted.

July 6--Apple HealthKit will completely take away the pleasure of having dessert

This week Apple convened its annual Global Developers Conference (WWDC). Whether you think Apple is still innovating or content with its place, the event has always been the focus of the world's attention and the core of news coverage. As a big play, Apple has unveiled the Healthkit,ios 8, which will make it easier to allow applications to share personal health data with the help of its users. HealthKit also allows applications to share the user's health and fitness data with the healthcare provider.

As usual, my first thought was, "is this really a good thing?" And then I thought, I'm more determined--well, I'm afraid it's not a good thing.

The good news is that iOS 8 won't be fully online until the end of 2014, so for now, people can sneak in a little snack.


1989 Education Mode:

--dad, give me a dollar, I can get the balance when I have the tape.

This is it again?

2014 Education mode:

Dad, give me 100 bucks, I have to pay off the ransom bill on my phone.

This is it again?

May 30--blackmail software pays to devour your pocket money

This week it was reported that some users of iOS products in Australia suffered from blackmail software locking devices. When I received the news, my first reaction was to take the appropriate steps to ensure that my iphone would not be recruited, and then immediately remind my daughter of the strict protection of the phone. When I was a young man, my parents had no need to worry about such unexpected electronic product expenditure. Alas, the parents of the 80 's were really alive and relaxed and comfortable.


This smart oven seems a little too smart. It doesn't get me started.

--he's going to cook ... Danger, call the police!

May 23--The smart oven?

Memorial Day is on the horizon, and the summer barbecue craze is poised to emerge. Barbecue is one of my favorite outdoor activities-open a bottle of beer, the oven to cook for themselves and their families a delicious meal, it is a joy in life. Of course, sometimes I cook or burn my hair, but as opposed to endless enjoyment, who cares about this episode? All in all, it's refreshing to stand by the fire and flip burgers, hot dogs and chicken rows.

Because of this, the recent release of intelligent oven technology has made me a little bit unhappy. I can't imagine what it would be like to have my own oven to decide when food has been cooked--what's the use for me? In terms of cooking equipment, I prefer to choose a fool-like traditional plan.


Wait, why are you doing this again?

This is to renew our privacy policy. Don't you remember, Mr. Zuckerberg?

--Hey, he's 30 years old, he's got a bad memory.

May 16--Zuckerberg usher in a new milestone in life

The big news is that Facebook's founder and CEO, Zuckerberg, welcomed his 30 birthday last Wednesday! It's hard to believe, right? Of course, 30 years old from any angle, level or starting point is not old (I have 44, but also defy the old). But by the age of 30, many people's hairline has begun to show signs of moving up, and the stomach is not as strong as it was when it was young, and it occasionally forgets why he walked into a room or why he attended a company's lawyer meeting.


Mother, happy Mother's Day! Look at the gift I've prepared for you--a more secure password!

May 9--This mother's day is more reassuring for mom

As you may know, this Sunday is the Holy Mother's Day. If you haven't figured out what kind of gift you should give your mom or wife on this important day, then the world Password Day just past may be a revelation-yes, the gift is to make their online life safer. The mother will always be happy with any gift that the child presents, so be bold enough to give yourself a high intensity code--it won't get beaten anyway.


The good news: we found the Atari E.T. Game cassette. The bad news: we found something else ...

-The evil paper clips: I am free yo ~

May 2--that's the fate of paper clips.

Anecdotal news from New Mexico State this week is that the guys from Microsoft's Xbox department and a film company dug up the E.T Atari 2600 game tapes that were unsold and buried long ago. These and other Atari devices that were not sold-including other game cassettes and game hardware-were buried in Alamogordo's landfills in 1983 after the game's massive death.

The whole process reminds me that there should be other products that are notorious and forgotten in the garbage dumps waiting to be discovered. Interestingly, seeing people holding e.t. Game Card screen, my first thought is that the evil paper clip image-Yes, it should also be thrown into the history of the abandoned warehouse.


I also think the Heartbleed loophole is really serious, but is it a bit of a fuss?

April 18--speaking of Heartbleed, we can't be too careful.

Well, this week I was inundated with reports of Heartbleed, and I had to work hard to figure out what I needed to do to make changes to my password. To further improve security, I have also changed the locks in my home, the types of beverages I drink in Starbucks, and even consider whether we should have some other safety precautions. No longer tangled up in security itself, at least it's better to be careful than to be sorry for something, right?


--juefd8iq7j, open the door!

April 11--Alibaba and unencrypted password

I don't know how you feel, but this week I have been bombarded with hearbleed OpenSSL leaks and trying to figure out which passwords on which sites I might have compromised and need to change as quickly as possible. This reminds me of the story of Alibaba and the 40 thieves, perhaps the world's most high-profile password-leaking case. Imagine if the 40 thieves would have been able to use the protection mechanism of the random cipher generator earlier.


-How easy it is to watch TV before we buy these streaming devices to watch TV programs easily.

April 4--streaming media device pedal nose

This week Amazon unveiled a new set-top box streaming media device, Fire TV. Like most friends, my first reaction when I heard the news was, "Why?" It seems that there are already a lot of similar products in the market, including Apple TV, Roku, Chromecast, Xbox and PlayStation, all of them want to plug their streaming content into the user's TV. Can the market really accommodate another streaming media product? What are the TV stations doing, sitting ducks?


If you think Facebook's past privacy policy is too scary, don't worry--read the 3D version of the jump.

March 28 Facebook to develop more horrific development plans around Oculus Rift

Obviously, one of the most eye-catching news of the week has to do with Zuckerberg. Once again, he pulled out a checkbook from his crotch, throwing 2 billion of dollars at Oculus VR, a Oculus Rift virtual reality device that has sparked a global boom. Although the first device was originally built for gamers, Facebook may eventually incorporate it into other development plans. Imagine a 3D view of Facebook's terms of service or privacy policy, rather than being tied to a traditional plane.


I have something on my body that's supported by the Android system, girls, guess what?

March 21--android Wear will make things worse.

Just this week, Google unveiled its Android Wear operating system, designed to extend Android to wearable devices. Android based smart watch as a knife class debut, but after this who knows what will come out of cattle and ghosts snakes? I think only the sky--or the imagination of device manufacturers and Android Wear developers--is the only constraint that binds their development.

I don't know how to feel about it. On the one hand, the news is really exciting. But on the other hand, things are probably going to get even weirder. In short, when ~ will give me the answer ...


Welcome to CERN (European Nuclear Research Council)


I don't understand, can I use this to share my cat video?

March 14--The ancestors of the waste of time, happy Birthday!

The last Wednesday was a memorable day: Just 25 years ago, March 12, 1989, Tiim Berners's program at CERN for document sharing among colleagues eventually turned into the later World Wide Web. Of course, at that time he didn't call it the World Wide Web (which I used in comics, but don't take it seriously). He was named "Mesh", is a set of "Global hyperlink system." Today, we'll simply call it a net, and I'm more inclined to call it "the global hyper-time waste system." ”


March: Come like Steve Ballmer ... Go like Tim.


--Hey, neighbors!

March 7--March as a technical storm

Another year of spring came, this March also proclaimed the long winter's departure. The saying goes that March is a month of contradictions, like lions and sheep. This year, I think it's time to talk about something different, such as the tech conference and the two industry leaders who are in the forefront of personality--in fact, in the March, the first thing that comes out of my head is their image.

Interestingly, although Tim has maintained a mild and cordial image, he has shown a rare strength at Apple's recent shareholder meetings. Therefore, perhaps the intrinsic impression is not necessarily completely accurate. But you know what I mean.


You know, burying a computer doesn't raise the security level of the Bitcoin, right?

February 28--Hide your bitcoin under the bed and wish yourself luck.

Two of seemingly unrelated events broke the peace of the week. First, the world's largest bitcoin trading platform, Tokyo Mt. Gox finally confessed to the loss of the digital currency, which has so far been worth hundreds of millions of of dollars. Next came a couple of California State found a bunch of 19th century U.S.-minted gold coins, which were valued at $10 million trillion--these treasures were stored in cans they lived underground.

The back of this story makes me think that Bitcoin can not be held in hand, and can not be hidden in the underground currency to be sure of the world. Even the well known and admired VCs like Fredwilson have finally affirmed it, so let me just assume that it's a real "money".


--what ' s app, brothers?--what ' s app and What ' s up ...

I think we paid for 19 billion dollars.

February 21--whats app?! Zuckerberg picked up a big bargain.

The tech thing this week is that Facebook bought WhatsApp with 19 billion dollars in cash plus a stock portfolio. My mother, for a communication application, this price is a bit exaggerated. But I guess Zuckerberg thinks the deal will make his company more competitive in the mobile market in developing countries, so it's worth it. But we have to wait and see what the actual results are.

Of course, when I hear WhatsApp this app, the first thing I think about is the old ad that Budweiser did. In addition, I found that the founders of WhatsApp must have listened to the user's "What ' app" voice. Of course, we have already got 19 billion dollars in the purchase amount, I believe they will face all the annoying problems with a smiling face.


Time Warner Cable TV

-I'm not sure, anyway, Comcast says they'll be here between eight o'clock in the morning and four o'clock in the afternoon to complete the deal.

February 14--Lucky, Comcast to clean up the mess.

The big news this week came from the cable media sector, where Comcast agreed to buy Time Warner 45 billion dollars. The deal has been passed in principle, but it still has to wait for approval from regulators and shareholders. Of course, the biggest problem for Time Warner is that it needs to remain sober-because Comcast has a potential eight-hour range of consultations. Don't do anything else, Time Warner, you just wait eight hours!


--Dear leaders want North Korea's self-developed operating system to have a similar look with Mac OS X? Why don't you learn Windows?

The Dear Leader is just a little crazy, but not stupid.

February 7--even Kim Jong Un is not that crazy.

Of course, the biggest news of the tech industry this week is that Microsoft has finally identified the new CEO. But I bet that the most interesting technical news of the week is that North Korea's latest operating system has a high degree of consistency with Apple's OS X. I wonder if the beloved leader, Kim Jong Un, has made a statement about this, but anyway, he has made such a surprising sensible decision-at least more sensible than to make friends with the Bulls ' aliens Rodman.


-Did you ask Siri? When does the movie start?

--yes, but she said she was busy communicating with Wakun Phoenix.

January 31--to love her until the Oscars are over

As you may already know, Wakun Phoenix, who plays the Fool in the movie "she", is hopelessly in love with the operating system dubbed by Johansson. The film has had a series of brilliant successes and won several Oscar nominations-including even one of the best film nominations.

Needless to say, this has triggered a series of follow-up guilt. If you're looking for Siri's help in the next few weeks, I'm afraid I need to be prepared to be patient--because she might be flirting with the guy. Of course, it may also be in the preparation of selection to attend the Oscars ceremony dress collocation.


-I personally recommend salmon with creamy dill sauce, and this dish will certainly be well received in Instagram.

January 30-Try salmon, but don't forget to turn on your phone flash

Last weekend I went to dinner with my wife and two little girls (a 11-year-old, 14-year-old). In fact, we rarely engage in this kind of family dinner, so we all have a bit of this as a matter of meaning. The girls were not allowed to take out their mobile phones while they were eating (unfortunately, I wasn't allowed to), so the meal gave a different feeling-because no one was taking pictures of the meal.

It reminds me of the food photos we had filmed and shared in social media or through Snapchat. Perhaps the restaurant should advertise the beauty of food and the effect of lens imaging? Who knows, perhaps this approach can really attract more customers.


Children, this is called "cash." What's it for? We have to use it to buy things when the power is off.

January 24--no electricity? We have a more traditional way of spending.

I took the children out to do some work last weekend. At every station, I did a thing I thought I would never have to meddle in--paying in cash, all in cash. Yes, I did not take out my credit card or move to pay the money.

It makes me think that my children grew up in a virtual payment environment, and I'm afraid that cash transactions have become a myth like the tooth Fairy. When their teeth are completely changed, perhaps we have been thoroughly thrown into the arms of Bitcoin. or let them register square so that they can swipe the credit card directly.


Hey, want to know what your husband just looked up on the internet?

Shut up, you bloody thermostat!

Wait, did you hear what he saw on YouTube?

January 17--The Internet of Things

The Internet of things set off a new wave this week, with Google acquiring Nest, which specializes in making intelligent devices for home environments, including thermostats, smoke alarms and carbon monoxide detectors. The acquisition will provide Google with a sizeable new source of data to help it figure out what people are doing at home. I'm really not used to the same kind of anxiety that I have with many friends: how do I know what personal activity information the thermostat acquired?


1984 Education Mode:

Did you really brush your teeth, or did you rub it with water and pretend you brushed it?

2014 Education mode:

Did you really brush your teeth, or did you crack the toothbrush and pretend you brushed it?

January 10--Children solve everyday problems with a cracked way

The big news this week came from the 2015 American Consumer Electronics Show, held in Las Vegas. Many manufacturers are here to showcase their new products, but the one that holds my eye is a toothbrush that can be connected to the Internet. The product is said to be able to collect data and send it to apps on the phone, so that we can learn that our dental care is not in place.

It sounds really cool, but as a parent, I think it's nice to be able to remind kids to brush their teeth or ask them if they have brushed their teeth before bedtime. I really don't understand why someone would give up such a good opportunity instead of handing the task over to the equipment to do it.


-I heard that there was a Chromebook in every five of the laptops that were sold last year.

-Yes, because they're cheap and full-featured.

-Yes, they can even be worn as gloves.

January 3--chromebook becomes the new Swiss Army knife

This Christmas, my wife and I decided to buy a Chromebook for two young daughters (a 11-year-old, 14-year-old). The reason is simple, we really can't stand the MacBook Pro that they're fighting for (sometimes, sometimes, just bickering), and they do need a piece of equipment to do their homework. The two little girls are also very fond of this gift, because Chromebook is really pretty.

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