cc jokes

9 jokes and 9 life principles 1. Architect A lady called the architect and said that every time the train passes, her bed would shake. "It's just nonsense. 1 The architect replied," let me take a look ." When the architect arrived, his wife suggested him lie in bed and feel the feeling of passing by train. The architect just went to bed, and the lady's husband came back. When he saw the situation, he shouted, "What are you doing in my wife's bed ?" Th

The school server can sisu network, so intends to write a self-crawling joke to the BBS of things, from the web search a joke site, feel most is not too cold. HTML structures such as the following:watermark/2/text/ahr0cdovl2jsb2cuy3nkbi5uzxqvbgl0dgxldgh1bmrlcg==/font/5a6l5l2t/fontsize/400/fill/i0jbqkfcma== /dissolve/70/gravity/southeast ">Can see, joke of the list of links in watermark/2/text/ahr0cdovl2jsb2cuy3nkbi5uzxqvbgl0dgxldgh1bmrlcg==/font/5a6l5l2t/fontsize/400/fill/i0jbqkfcma== /dissolve/

Adobe CC Family (CC 2015) Master Edition v5.6#2# # #请彻底卸载旧版后再安装本版! Update Adobe Digital Publishing CC 2016.1Update Adobe Acrobat DC 2015.010.20056 integrated adobe acrobat XI 11.0.14 SPIntegrated Adobe Illustrator CC 2015.2 32-Bit EditionIntegrated Adobe InCopy CC 2015 32-Bi

, user guide, and various installation methods. You can register and install them first. The steps are clear and the ideas are clear, so that people can click on them, when you are playing, you can do everything. Then: You can tell a story and tell a story! This is a story about wealth and dreams. It is an unknown young man's struggle history. One more thing ...... grasp the user's mind and don't let them think too much, because cranking will kill yourself! Dead cats! Come back: make money

Workplace Jokes OneCompany leaders listen to the company staff small B said small x dry very uncomfortable, the feeling of wanting to walk. The leader is not happy with the small x, the benefits of less to his consideration, the bonus less to point, do not give a good face to see. The results of small x really upset, really resigned. The leader sighed: "Fortunately Lao Tzu material things first, less send you point bonus, Lao Tzu If more hair is not l

: This article mainly introduces jokes about Programmers. For more information about PHP tutorials, see. 1, Do you need a client in the hotel? When you are not busy, you only need a client when you are busy. 2, "Have you ever thought about the programmer who made this software when using piracy ?! How should they support their families ?" "Haha, don't tease me. Where do programmers have a family !" 3, A programmer is invited by a sister to repair the

1. The purpose of this article is to practice web crawlersGoal:1 . Climb to embarrassing encyclopedia popular jokes 2 . Remove the satin with the picture 3. Get the release time of the Satin, the publisher, the content, and the number of likes.2. First we determine the URL is HTTP://WWW.QIUSHIBAIKE.COM/HOT/PAGE/10 (you can choose freely), first constructs to see whether the successConstruction Code:1 #-*-coding:utf-8-*-2 ImportUrllib3 ImportUrllib24 I

#!/usr/bin/env python# coding:utf-8#-*-coding:utf-8-*-import requestsfrom bs4 import beautifulsoup#import Pandasnewur L= ' http://www.qiushibaike.com/text/page/1/' headers = {' user-agent ': ' mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 6.1; WOW64) applewebkit/537.36 (khtml, like Gecko) chrome/55.0.2859.0 safari/537.36 '}res = Requests.get (newurl,headers= Headers) res.encoding = ' utf-8 ' soup = BeautifulSoup (Res.text, "html.parser") A = Soup.select ('. Content ') for I in A:print (i . Select (' span ') [0].text.

kinds: 1. Toilets are also part of our service, you go back. Then go to the QA: you have to have a plan to test our bar, our bar is ready to open, you have 1 days to test, whatever you do, remember to tell me if I can open AH! As long as you say no, I will not open, but I do not profit your wages ... 2. What? Fucking Take my money and do this? Change one!!! Then the QA response: 1. Only 1 days? You have to ask about the wine first. 2. This bar has a safety hazard and cannot be opened!! Then the

1. A: "Look at your face is not good, you are ill?" ”B: "I'm not sick, my husband is ill, I have to watch him day and night." ”A: "Don't you have a nurse?" ”B: "Because there is a nurse, I have to watch him day and night!" ”2. Wife: "Last night you always talk in your sleep, do you know?" ”Husband: "I don't know, what did I say?" ”Wife: "You seem to scold me." ”Husband: "It is possible, because the daytime is too busy, can not spare to scold you." ”3. The wife of a cavalry said to her husband, "

that after bringing two bottles of 5LY to find a teacher, drink more after the beginning of brother commensurate, the teacher said, "' foreign Moon than China Circle ' is not the right fault, I am a biology teacher teaches history (biology teacher??? , I find the math teacher AH), you say today drinking tools English word pronunciation you math is 60 points, (which happy AH) "," China "," Yes, you go ", when you go out to listen to the teacher in the back said:" Never do not take the "C" Hina "

My girlfriend owed me 4 Yuan, I broke up with her, she dumped four dollars on my face, I used four yuan to buy eight genuine truth sticks, ran to the small Dragon kindergarten success cheat to four little friends, through the traffickers sold to the ravine to obtain the income of 10,005, Hand 10,005 out of 10,000 go to disco buy shake. Head. Pill 30, average cost of 310 yuan per 400 yuan to the price of the first to come to the disco. Young, profit 2700 yuan, take out 700 yuan to find small jie,

a big beauty, she said: ' I like the station that left the handsome guy, I want to be his girlfriend, I want to give him a monkey. 'A: hehe.B: Another girl said, "He looks like a dog, alas."A: Do you have it?B: The first girl said, "I really like puppies."A: OhB: Another girl said: "You see his work is not a reliable, and not a random, the lack of bull." I also heard that this person is unfaithful, unjust, dubious, no fish, no man ...A: Stop! You say I hit you again, am I so miserable ?B: The f

people are as strong as cows. 　　 5. Power-back 　　 A scotch went to London and wanted to visit an old friend, but forgot his address. So he sent a telegram to his father: "Do you know the address of Toma? Please note !" 　　 On that day, he received an urgent call back: "Yes ." 　　 [Epiphany] 　　 When we finally find the most correct answer, we find that it is the most useless. 　 6. Sad Stories 　　 Three people are on vacation in New York. They booked a suite on the fifth floor of a High-Rise H

I sent a telegram to my father: "Do you know the address of Toma? Please note !"On that day, he received an urgent call back: "Yes ."　　 [Epiphany]When we finally find the most correct answer, we find that it is the most useless.　　 6. Sad Stories　　 Three people are on vacation in New York. They booked a suite on the fifth floor of a High-Rise Hotel.One night, the elevator in the building failed and the waiter arranged for them to spend the night in the hall.After the discussion, they decided to

. 5. Power-back A Scotland man went to London and wanted to visit an old friend, but forgot his address. So he sent a telegram to his father: "Do you know the address of Thomas? Please kindly advise !" On that day, he received an urgent call back with two words: Yes.[Epiphany] When we finally find the most correct answer, we find that it is the most useless. 6. Sad Stories Three people are on vacation in New York. They booked a suite on the fifth floor of a High-Rise Hotel. One nigh

Jokes about testers abroad --- Http://www.geocities.com/xtremetesting/ --- Kiki Translated on Joke (1) AQ: How many software testers are required to replace a light bulb? A: No, because the software tester only notices that the room is black. The tester is not responsible for fixing the problem. They only find the problem. BQ: How many programmers need to change a light bulb? A: What is the problem? The light bulb on my desk is good! Or a: No. It's

More like the Phoenix News client's Fun series, so I wrote a python program to download all the addresses of such jokes.The following program is just download the first page of all the article URL, the program modified, you can crawl all the articles.#!/usr/bin/python#-*-coding:utf-8-*-import requestsimport jsonimport reheaders={"Host":'i.ifeng.com', "user-agent":"mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 6.1; WOW64; rv:34.0) gecko/20100101 firefox/34.0", "Accept":"*/*", "Accept-language":"zh

#-*-coding:utf-8-*-ImportUrllibImportUrllib2ImportRedefGet_duanzi (URL): Store=[] user_agent='mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 10.0; WOW64)'Headers={'user-agent': user_agent} request=urllib2. Request (url,headers=headers) Response=Urllib2.urlopen (Request) HTML=response.read (). Decode ('Utf-8') Pattern=re.compile ('', Re. S) Results=Re.findall (pattern,html) forResultinchresults:haveimg=re.search ("img", result[2]) if nothaveImg:store.append ([result[0],result[1],result[3]]) forStinchStore:P

Import reImport Urllib.requestFrom docx import DocumentHeader= ("User-agent", ' user-agent:mozilla/5.0 (Windows NT 10.0; WOW64) applewebkit/537.36 (khtml, like Gecko) chrome/55.0.2883.87 safari/537.36 ')Opn=urllib.request.build_opener ()Opn.addheaders=[header]Document = document ()Document.add_heading (' Embarrassing encyclopedia ', 1)For I in Range (0,12): data = Opn.open (' https://www.qiushibaike.com/8hr/page/' +str (i+1) + '/'). Read (). Decode () pat= ' Rst=re.compile (Pat,re. S).