20 funny jokes

1. Several people from the snake, ant, spider, and scorpion play mahjong at home. After 8 laps, the smoke is exhausted. Vendors

Who needs to buy cigarettes. The snake said, "I have no feet. I don't want to go. Let the ant financial go ." Ant said: "Eight spider feet

, More than me, let the spider go ." The Spider said, "I have more feet than me.

Go ." I was helpless and thought, "No way. Who made me have more feet? So the scorpion went out to buy cigarettes ...... I

After more than an hour, I don't know how to buy cigarettes. After two hours, I still don't know how to buy cigarettes. So let everyone

The spider went out and saw the spider sitting at the door as soon as he went out. The Spider was angry and asked, "Why are you still

Don't you go? Everyone is waiting ." Mao was also anxious and said, "nonsense! You have to wait until I wear my shoes!

"

2. One night, when a young woman passes through a mental hospital, a "wow"

Sound. The woman turned her head and saw that a hanging man was chasing her. The woman was so scared that she ran after

The men in the face are chasing. No, there is a dead end in front of it, and the women are crying on the ground.

"Do what you want to do. Please do not kill me ." The man smiled and said,"

Really? Now you start to chase me ."

3. When someone is good at using a notebook computer and listens to a friend who says that a mouse is better than a trackball, he borrowed one from his friend.

Home trial. Because it is not essential, electricity his friends. A: The mouse is more difficult to use than the trackball. After sliding for half a day, the mouse moves a little bit,

It's inconvenient to press the button on the back ......

4. A warship sailed at sea. One night, a sailor suddenly found a light in the distance.

He immediately reported to the captain: "report to the Captain. A ship is heading for us not far away. If we do not change the channel,

It's about to hit !" Once the captain heard it, he immediately called "call! I'm the captain. Please ship your ship immediately

, 10 degrees to the east !" The other party returns: "Call! Please move to the West for 10 degrees !" CAPTAIN: "I am

Warship, you dare to ask me to move !" The other party immediately said, "test! I'm a beacon, and you can try it !"

5. the spider and the bee got engaged, and the spider was very dissatisfied, so he asked his mother: "Why should we make

I want to marry a bee ?" The spider's mother said, "the bee is a bit noisy, but it is also a flight attendant ." Honey

The bee was not satisfied, so she asked her mother, "Why should I marry a spider ?" Bee's

My mother said, "the spider is a little ugly, but people are also engaged in the Internet ."

After the spider and the bee get married, they are very happy at first. The bee said, "Ah, I can eat meat. Spider said

: Ah, good. I can taste the honey. Afterwards, the bee said, "If you don't go out all day long, you will know what to do with you ."

Broken Lan! Spider said: all day long go out and get rid of all cosmetics! Finally reconciled,

: The bees always complain: You are too closed. You always stay on your own network and whether you can access the Internet or the Internet.

Spider communication. The spider sighed: Alas, you don't know. The company is limited, so you really cannot access the Internet.

Ah.

6. A farmer's daughter is too ugly to marry. The farmer had to let her go to the corn field.

The scarecrow scared the crow. As a result, she not only scared the crow, but also scared the Three crows

The stolen corn was sent back.

7. An international student in the United States wants to take an international driver's license. I was too nervous during the exam and saw the ground

The marking line is left. He asked: Turn left? Invigilator replied: Right. So he immediately

Turn right. Sorry, he only needs to come back next time.

8. If someone studies English hard, he will eventually become a child. I am sorry.
Foreigners should say: I am sorry too. After hearing this, someone said: I am sorry three.
What are you sorry? Someone was helpless and said: I am sorry five.

9. A white rabbit ran happily in the forest. On the road, I met a giraffe who was rolling marijuana.

The white rabbit said to the giraffe, "why do you want to hurt yourself? Look at this piece

How beautiful the forest is, let's run together in nature !" Giraffe look at the smoke, look at the white

The rabbit threw the smoke behind him and followed the White Rabbit to run in the forest.

Later I met an elephant who was preparing to suck cool. The white rabbit said to the elephant, "the elephant, you are

What should we do to hurt ourselves? Let's see how beautiful the forest is. Let's run together in nature.

!" The elephant looked at koke alkali and looked at the White Rabbit, so he threw it behind him, followed by the White Rabbit and long

The deer is running in the forest.

Later I met a lion preparing to beat heroin. The white rabbit said to the lion, "lion, you are

What should we do to hurt ourselves? Let's see how beautiful the forest is. Let's run together in nature.

!" The lion looked at the needle and looked at the white rabbit. So he threw the needle behind him and rushed to beat the White Rabbit.

A while.

An elephant and a giraffe were shaking: "Why do you want to beat a white rabbit? So kindly care about our health

Kang also calls us closer to nature ." The lion said angrily: "This bastard rabbit, every time it's done

Drag me like an idiot and run in the forest !"