22nd: The Psychology of procrastination

22nd: The Psychology of procrastination

The practice of GTD has been 20 months ago, the symptoms of procrastination has been reduced a lot, my omnifocus deadline list is generally able to complete ahead of time, gradually a bit inner peace state.

Pick up this "procrastination psychology", is for the children, she just on the third day, did not expect to have the problem of procrastination, often can see her math homework dragged to 10 o'clock in the evening to start hands, my previous procrastination symptoms and she certainly different, read this book is to find out with her procrastination symptoms match the plot, Find some way to deal with it.

It is amazing to delay this kind of trouble, and now think back to the scene of the previous delay, I can't remember why we dragged a PPT or document to the 4 o'clock in the morning to finish writing.

This book is rated at 8.3 on the watercress, many readers recommend this masterpiece, should not be missed, but the 200-page book is not too thick, but it is always read to be unable to mention God, half a book has been turned over, the symptoms of procrastination, psychological response, the principle of the brain said a lot, still can not find any procrastination solution. A few days ago on QQ with Old Sun talk about this book, with old Sun words:

"Procrastination Psychology" is almost finished, I was to read this book and insisted, personally think that the book's editorial failure directly caused me to read the delay. Take four factors in the book as an example:

① 's lack of confidence in success: The book is so verbose that it doubts validity;

② refused to be delegated: there were too many ways to preach in the book;

③ is easy to distract: The book is often not known in rambling;

The ④ goal is too big and distant: too thick.

But psychological analysis is in place.

This passage is the same as when I read this book, a few times to pick up the book can not be read, we joke:

To read this procrastination psychology without delay means that you've cured procrastination.

Old Sun's words triggered my thinking: The book should not be read backwards from the front, but should be read backwards! Find out a few useful suggestions, briefly check the previous section of the explanation, hands-on practice immediately!

The most useful is the last appendix II of the Book: A compilation of delaying processing techniques. Direct Google stickers:

1. Establish an operational goal (observable, concrete and tangible), rather than vague and abstract goals.

2, set a pragmatic goal. Don't be whimsical, start with the little things. Don't be too idealistic, but choose a goal that is the least acceptable.

3. Break your goals into short, specific mini-targets. Every mini-goal is easier to achieve than big goals, and small goals can accumulate into big goals.

4, realistically (rather than according to their wishes) to treat time. Ask yourself: How much time will this task actually take me? How much time can I really spare?

5, just start doing! Don't try to do the whole thing all at once, just take one small step at a time.

6, take advantage of the next 15 minutes. You can tolerate anything for 15 minutes. You can only finish one thing in 15 minutes over and over again. So what you do in 15 minutes is quite meaningful.

7, for the difficulties and setbacks to prepare psychologically. When you encounter the first (or second, third) difficulty, don't give up. Difficulty is just a problem that you need to solve, it is not a reflection of your personal value or ability.

8. If possible, assign the task (or even throw it away!) ）。 Are you really the only person who can do this? Is it really necessary to do this?

9, protect your time. Learn how to say no, don't do extra or unnecessary things. In order to do important things, you can decide to ignore the "urgent" thing.

10, pay attention to your excuses. Do not habitually use excuses to procrastinate, but consider it a signal to do another 15 minutes. Or use your excuses as a reward for completing a step.

11. Reward your progress along the journey. Focus your rewards on your efforts, not the results. Be careful about the way you think: You can say that the cup is half empty, or that it is semi-full.

12, the delay as a signal. Stop and ask yourself, "What is the message of procrastination?" ”

The second is the last chapter of the book (The 18th chapter: Smart to get rid of the cycle of passive procrastination), there is a special section of the "advice to parents", talked about how to help children with procrastination. These techniques are effective not only for children, but for all those who procrastinate. This part is what I read the main purpose of this book, all Google copy on:

1. Help your child set small goals

Teach your child to break a task down into several components;

Each task can be decomposed into several parts;

Any task can only be step-by-step;

Set short breaks for work-10 minutes or 15 minutes each time;

If 15 minutes is too long, shorten it to 5 minutes.

2. Help your child to identify the length of time

Practice makes it no more pragmatic than ideal;

Practice predicting the time required to complete a task;

Step backwards from the final stage to accurately understand the right start time;

Look at the schedule and think about how much time is really available;

Teach your child to use a timer.

3. Set clear limits and results

What exactly must be done, what is the consequence of not doing it;

Not to set a task's start time, but to decide when it must be done;

Consider writing a written agreement;

Pragmatic and perseverance to achieve results.

4, with the corresponding reward as encouragement

Reward Qi strives to be creative and persistent, not rewarded for the result;

It is important to reward him for every step it takes, not just the final step of the reward;

Reward for the completion of a goal and the completion of each step along the way;

Turn the interface into a reward-for example, if you're hungry, write a 15-minute paper and then go get something to eat.

5, remember who this is the matter: who is the owner of this job? Your child, not you.

Your child is not an extension of you;

Your child's performance is not a reflection of your personal value; Adjust your own disappointment. Strong embarrassment and jealousy and other emotions;

Never do anything for your child that he can do for himself;

Don't save! Let your child taste the bitter fruit himself. (You can try "time trading")

6. Respect your child's need for independence

Try to stay flexible and make your child's choice as much as possible;

Is it more important to choose whether to fight for victory or to prove that you are right than to maintain a relationship and help your child develop in his own way?

7. Whenever you find perfectionist tendencies in your child or in yourself, fight against it.

To talk about mistakes and to admit their mistakes with humor and alacrity;

Be careful not to exaggerate, to acknowledge human limitations and weaknesses.

8. Talk about fear-your own, including your child's

Fear is a universal human experience, and there are many reasons for fear;

When we are afraid, we can still take action.

Courage is not not fear, but conquest of fear.

9. Listen to what your child tells you with curiosity rather than judgment

Restrain yourself from saying such things, "Why don't you just do it?" "or some other statement, in particular, not to speak to the child with anger, distrust, arbitrariness, or any other similar tone;

Never show contempt or scorn for your child or for her procrastination;

No matter how difficult the delay is, the fact that he has his purpose and usefulness, which must be respected without prior judgment, makes it easier for your child to take control of these obstacles and break through the resistance to action.

What is more useful is the 16th chapter, which suggests some of the problems with attention deficit disorder and the implementation of dysfunction procrastinators.

And then the 第13-15 chapter, the combat method A, B, C.

The 12th chapter of combat weapons is also worth a look.

The contents of chapters 1th to 11th should be read quickly, the sooner the better, the feeling that these are for procrastination psychologists write, let you have a bunch of theoretical basis, but will not translate into any action. The contents of these chapters have deviated from the purpose of my reading this book, and I am not interested in collating the notes of these chapters.

Why is GTD able to cure procrastination? Against the previous 12 and GTD relationship, unexpectedly found a GTD system in the practice of at least 10 of them, ready to write an article, the title has been thinking: "Why Gtder no longer delay?" (This article was completed without delay on March 17).

22nd: The Psychology of procrastination