3-2-1 Shadow Handling

3-2-1 Shadow handling

First select what you want to work with. Starting with a "difficult person" (such as a partner, boss, or parent) that attracts you or makes you uncomfortable, it's easier to do so, but you can also choose the images or body sensations that distract or fascinate you. Remember that this interference is likely to be positive or negative.

There are two ways to identify the shadow or the material that forms the shadow:

A: A passive way of being super sensitive, prone to triggering, reacting, being provoked, angry, wounded, sad, or it can hinder your life with a constant emotional tone or mood.

Another: To make you active in a way that is super sensitive, addictive, possessive, distracted, overly attracted, or, on the other, continuously idealized, resulting in specific emotions and motivations.

Then there are the following 3 steps:

3-Face

Take a close look at your obsession and then, using a diary or a conversation with an empty chair, use a third-person pronoun such as "he", "she", "it", "his", "her", "his", "theirs" to depict the person, the situation, the image, or the feeling in a delicate and vivid way. This is an opportunity to fully explore the troubled experience, especially to explore what bothers you. Instead of shrinking and diluting your worries, take advantage of this opportunity to describe it in as full and detailed a way as possible.

2-Conversation

Use the second person pronoun ("You" and "you") to talk to this consciousness. This is an opportunity to build relationships with your mind, and to talk directly to people, situations, images, or feelings in your consciousness. At first you may ask the question: "Who are you/what?" Where do you come from? What are you trying to get from me? What do you need to tell me? What gift have you brought me? "Allow this obsession to answer you, imagine the content of these questions, write them down or read them out." Allow and accept the content of the conversation to surprise you.

1-Become it

To write or say in the first person, to describe the person, situation, image, or feeling you already know, with the words "I" and "we", to see the world completely from the point of view of the person who troubled you, who also includes yourself, allowing you to not only find similarities, but also that you are actually one and the same. Finally, say a word of approval: "I am ____." "or" ____ is me. This sentence, in its nature, makes people feel very discordant or "wrong." (After all, this is the kind of denial you have in mind!) But try, at least in this sentence, the core of the truth.

The final step (1 of 3-2-1) usually has a second part, called re-possession of the shadow. Looking at the world in the first person's perspective, not a moment's work can be hastily concluded, only the most fundamental feeling-the feeling or motivation that has been rejected-is clearly yours to be treated and integrated.

Finally, let the previously excluded reality show up on many other levels, which will bring about changes in consciousness, emotion, subtle energies, and thus release the energies and concerns that are consumed by denial. You feel happier, freer, calmer and open, and sometimes excited or dizzy, and you know that the process is starting to work and it brings a new alternative lifestyle.

Example 1: Phil visits childhood friends

3-Face

I was afraid to visit my childhood best friend. The last time I went to his house, he and his wife and family all made me sick. He's a total coward! His wife took control of his life! His work is super safe, secure, and lifeless. He did not enjoy the life of the fountain is how carefree dripping! I have never felt the awe-blowing between the hair and the ends! If he can walk on the edge of the wild occasionally, it will be twice as fresh as now! But he betrayed himself. It makes me sick, and it makes me crazy to be with him.

2-Conversation

Phil: Why did you let your wife decide everything?

Joe: I don't, but I respect her opinion.

Phil: Why are you so happy about that not-so-lifeless job?

Joe: Hey, this job is good, it's a decent job, I like it.

Phil: Why don't you consider setting up your own company?

Joe: I like the way it is. It is more secure and not tired. What's so bad about that?

Phil repeatedly asked, found that Joe likes security and stability, do not want to live in the big ups and downs. But Phil likes to explore and fight for all the limits that can be fought and attainable.

1-Become it

Phil has become Joe. Phil said: "I want a safe, secure, smooth and predictable life." “

Re-own Shadow

Phil realized that he had denied his need for safety and security so thoroughly that he was easily touched by Joe's qualities. Everyone needs two things: excitement, vitality, adventure, passion, dazzle and high pay, and the other side is safety, security, predictability and comfort. Originally, he denied one aspect, now he became more complete, he can put two aspects of values into consideration, while the conscious clearly lunchbox.

This usually requires a change in perception and energy. Phil can continue to learn more about his safety and security needs and integrate them to make new choices in life more freely. He may have felt a new sympathy and empathy for Joe. He may realize that when his father died at the age of 12, he idealized his bluff father, a behavior that cast a shadow over his inner world. He may even find new ways to deal with life's challenges, for example, he may have a deep gratitude with Joe and Joe's family for a day and a half, the rest of the time to stay in the hotel, so as to avoid a certain aspect of demand over-consumption. All of this can happen.

From "Life Is like practice"

3-2-1 Shadow Handling