A Smile _ Classic net Pick

Best Jokes in America:

Two hunters from New Jersey hunted in the forest. A man suddenly fell on the ground, turned his eyes and stopped breathing. The companion sees this situation, picks up the handset, calls to the emergency center. "My friend is dead," he cried to the attendant, in dismay. What am I going to do? The attendant gently said: "Don't be nervous, don't worry, I'll help you." But you have to let us believe that he is indeed dead. ”
A silence ... Then came a gunshot. The hunter picks up the phone again and says: "OK, what do we do next?" ”


Best jokes in England:

A woman sits on a bus with a child in her arms. The driver glanced at the child and suddenly said, "I have never seen such an ugly child in my life!" ”
The angry woman went to the last row, sat down, and said to a man next to him, "This driver insulted me just now!" "The man replied:" You hurriedly go to him to settle accounts, I come to hold this ugly monkey for you! ......”


Best Jokes in Canada:

The Canadian aerospace division began to send astronauts to space for the first time, but they soon got reports that astronauts could not write at all in a weightless state with ballpoint pens. So they spent 10 years, 12 billion dollars, and scientists finally invented a ballpoint pen. This pen is suitable for weightlessness, body handstand, water, any plane object, Celsius 零下300度.
And Russians have been using pencils in space.


German best joke:

The general found a soldier behaving strangely: he always picked up a piece of paper, looked at it, threw it aside, and murmured, "No, not this!" The general ordered his psychiatrist to see the soldiers. Psychologist examination later wrote: This person has psychological obstacles, not soldiers.
The soldier picked up the diagnosis and said happily: "Yes, that's it!" ”


Best jokes in Australia:

A woman came to the hospital with all her anxiety. "Doctor, show me quickly!" When I woke up this morning, I looked in the mirror, terrified, and my hair was standing, wrinkled, pale, flushed, and looking like a dead man. What's wrong with me, Doc? ”
The doctor examined the patient carefully and said, "Well, I can safely tell you that you have no problem with your eyesight!" ”


Best joke in Holland:

Two friends play on the local golf course. A man lifted the rod high, was about to hit the ball, suddenly found on the road there is a long funeral procession. He put down the rod, closed his eyes, and prayed. The astonished friend said: "This is the most touching and deep scene I have been fortunate to see all my life." You're a real good samaritan! The man answered, "Yes, you know, I've been married to her for 35 years!" ”


The English people talk about 3 jokes of Scots and Irish people:

1. An Irishman called a travel company: "How long will it take me to get to London by plane?" The clerk wanted to see the plane timetable and said to him, "(please wait) a minute, sir!" "Thank you very much!" The Irishman replied with satisfaction and hung up the phone.

2. A Scotsman returned home from England. The family asked, "How about in London?" The Scot replied, "It's OK!" It is the English people who are very strange. When I was staying at the hotel, they knocked on the wall like a madman in my next door. "Then what did you do then?" "I didn't do anything!" I was just playing the flute all night! ”

3. An Irishman came to London for a holiday and stayed in a fancy hotel. The waiter picked up the box and took him to the room. The Irishman said angrily, "Watch it!" Don't think I'm from Ireland, let me live in such a small room! The waiter quickly explained: "Don't be angry, sir!" This is the elevator. ”