How do we talk to children about violence and hate when social violence occurs?

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Recent social violence has occurred frequently. In the event of a Kunming incident, it was early morning in the United States. So after we were shocked by the news, we kept checking the latest news on our computers and mobile phones throughout the morning, such as how many people were injured and killed.

Soon we found that our 4-year-old guy would stare at us and listen to us quietly. Then he started to interject: Is there a bad guy? Who is dead.

We didn't know how much he understood, so we began to avoid words like "murderer", "death", and "injury. But apparently he's trying to understand what we're talking about, and we're confusing him. So we had to avoid talking about this topic in front of him.

When talking to an American mother who has three children, she says these incidents will obviously affect or even hurt her children. A 7-Year-Old friend of her refused to go to school after a serious campus shooting incident, and she was grumpy. The child just saw some clips on TV. However, it seems that parents cannot avoid this topic forever, because the news on TV is always playing tragedies, and people around them will continue to talk about it. Older children are most affected because they have reached the age to understand such things, but apparently they are not big enough to face these cruelty.

Then this American mom recommended me a website called ADL (http://www.adl.org /). The organization that established the website (Anti-Defamation leleague) was initially established by Jews to protest against the anti-Judah tendency. Now there are some articles on this website about how Jewish parents, after experiencing a lot of hatred and violence against Jews, summarize how to talk about these things with their children, at the same time, it can still make the children healthy and sunny, love the world, and not breed hatred.

Some suggestions are as follows. I will write it out. Maybe Kunming's parents and teachers will find that these skills are exactly what they need:

Preparation:

First, parents must face their own emotions and understand their feelings. These Emotions affect children.

Listener:

Parents should first ask questions to their children and listen carefully to learn how much they know about these things. All questions and emotions of children are respected and valued. Do not show attitudes that make children feel ridiculous or insignificant.

Honest:

Answer questions in a clear and honest manner and use appropriate wording. If you don't know how to answer, you can tell them that you don't know, but let them know that you will try to find the answer.

Action

Children need to know that big people are not powerless to face hatred and violence, and there are many things to be done. Tell the children that the world is not perfect, but tell them that their parents and teachers will do their best to protect them. Tell them how to seek help from adults in case of danger or violence.

In addition, the website of ADL has some other articles about prejudice and hate. I think it is important for each of our parents that we should not be the disseminators of hatred and prejudice ourselves. We should examine our behaviors and behaviors to avoid words with discrimination, prejudice, and hatred. In this incident, we may say, "How are Xinjiang people. In addition, for children who have the ability to think deeply, they may be able to discuss with them whether "Violence" can solve problems.

In any case, this world is filled with too many prejudices and inexplicable hatred, and the resulting violence will bring harm to more people. If there is something that every parent can do now, let our next generation not share the same mistakes.

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