Humorous and joke set 2

1,

In the new year, we will take a close root in the group and hold high the great banner of the theory, saying, coming, coming, and leaving, conscientiously implement the requirements of "leaving your breath while leaving a message", adhere to the ideological line of "no words, no words, no words", and carry forward the fearless spirit of "One not afraid of acid, two not afraid of trouble, "Keep in touch and often harass" is the top priority to revitalize the group! We need to fundamentally change the method of "coming for a few days, coming to the door, leaving without talking! There should be new ideas, new ideas, new breakthroughs, and a new situation for pushing messages! Adhere to "four items": organization, premeditation, confidence, and achievement. Mutual Promotion and common development, so that our group can embark on sustainable development while resolutely implementing the new 2008 concept:
1. Money is not a problem. The problem is that there is no money.
2. If a diamond has a long history, it will go bankrupt.
3. water can carry the boat, but also can cook porridge.
4. One Mountain cannot accommodate two tigers, unless one father and one mother.
5. Fire can try gold, gold can try women, and women can try men.
6. The incense is not necessarily a monk or a panda.
7. If I'm drunk, I will help the wall.
8. I am like a fly lying on the glass. The future is bright and there is no way out.
9. Why is there? One thing reduces one thing.
We hope to conscientiously study and implement it!

2,
Warning:
Color Ring: Do not play with enemy women!
Name cast: Do not play with a brother's woman!
Apple: Do not play with the boss's women!
Yangtze River 7: Do not play alien women!
Assembly No.: No women have finished playing
Inspiration from the five major movies at the end of the year:
Color Ring: Unreliable women
Apple: unreliable men
Name cast: Not reliable either
Assembly number: less reliable for organizations
Yangtze River 7: unreliable people on earth
Conclusion: male and female are the most reliable

Color Ring: The only thing that saves your life is your woman.
Name cast: only your brother is here to avenge you.
Assembly No.: The organization that abandons you is always
Color Ring: women can use 10 karat
"Name cast": Brothers can use their official positions.
Collection No.: organizations can deal with everyone.
"Color Ring": A woman is reliable only when she is happy.
Name cast: reliable only when the brothers die
Assembly No.: The organization will never be reliable

3,

Notice
In order to relieve the employment pressure this year, the Ministry of Education has introduced a new degree system. After graduation, you can continue to study as a strong person. After four years of graduation, you can study as a warrior and as a Saint Seiya, if you still cannot find a job after graduation, Please study for a martyr's degree. Generally, this is basically the final result, but in response to the needs of some studious students, the martyrs can continue to study for the fighters (this degree is still in the experimental stage ).
Ministry of Education of the People's Republic of China

4,

Let's see which bank is the best in China!
China Construction Bank (CBC): "saving"
Bank of China (BC): "Not saved! "
Agricultural Bank of China (ABC): "Ah, no"
Industrial and Commercial Bank of China (ICBC): "You can't save it! "
Minsheng Bank (cmsz): "Save it, dumb! "
China Merchants Bank (CMBC): "Save it, idiot! "
China Development Bank (CDB): "save point! "
Industrial Bank (CIB): "saved one hundred! "
Beijing Commercial Bank (bccb): "white deposit, deposit not"
HSBC (HSBC): "I still don't want to save it! "