The so-called emotional quotient, is to have a sense of propriety

"The so-called emotional quotient, is to put others at heart." ""The highest EQ is called its own discretion." in the magazine saw Ma's interview, this is the title. every time to see the "Flower said", all feel MA eq is high, hold a bunch of "ghosts and Goblins" (This is Kua), the history of aviation described him, the most wonderful thing is "precision and sense of propriety." observing the people around us who are especially good at people, also have a comfortable sense of proportion. Most of the time, humor and meanness are between the lines, and a great man can master a delicate balance. we may not be so advanced, but at least we can learn some basic rules, or not embarrass each other. before I wrote "The so-called emotional quotient is high, is to understand the good talk", this is the sequel of this series, the same, is all dry goods oh.
1. Do not feel mixed up, you can casually joking, everyone's bottom line is different. The term, you say a fat "fat", is ridicule, you say people "fat", it is a bit insulting; you say a girl like "fat pig", but also a little Moe, but you say she is like "sow", that is abusive, you say Friend "fool", is a joke, you say he "idiot", is a curse. On the occasion, in private everyone can be a large scale, but if there are many friends present, you casually joking, may hurt the face of friends. Another point, everyone's bottom line is not the same, the bottom line of each circle is not the same. For example, in our company, we can call each other "stupid", "forced", "counseling", "ugly force", we are very accustomed to, feel fun, but put these words to say other people, the other side will turn against.

2. Do not echo when others are black. do you know the subtext of others ' self-darkness? is to "come and refute me." So, when others say that they are fat ah, short ah, the head big ah, all kinds of shortcomings, we should do is, if the other side exaggerated, it is sincere to say, not at all, if the other side is telling the truth, then the other side of the sincerity to tell the other advantages. Brackets, the staff of my company please recite this one with emphasis. For Mao since the black, you have stepped on 10,000 feet! Do you have a sense of propriety Ah!!!

3. There is no need to be formal with the opposite sex, but keep boundaries. Some girls boast of men, and boys brother-in-the-ordinary boys do not matter, but for those who have a girlfriend, really should pay attention to keep the distance. Especially you this attitude, appears to be a friend, the boy's girlfriend is also embarrassed jealous, if jealous, also appear people not enough atmosphere. Don't tell your girlfriend what "you don't mind, he does not treat me as a woman", you do not have sex, you again man, nature is still a woman ah. Everyone is an adult, to understand the friendship is the border, the arbitrary cross-border people, really is the character has a problem.

4. Since you have said "casually", let others make a decision, then you should not be blind. people ask what to eat, you say "casually", then please do your word, to be really casual, no matter what other people say which restaurant, you have to agree. The most annoying kind of people no matter what they say, are not good, just to exercise the negative right, you special who ah. Also, no matter what restaurant you choose, you should not pick. That said casually, went, all kinds of picky, also spit Groove said "early know to another family", you why didn't you say earlier? Also, when traveling, you lazy, do not do raiders, let others do, then you have to respect the labor of others, you know how hard to do the strategy? to spend many days, various search information, various comparisons, various FQ ... You did not do anything, the result went to the destination, a variety of picky, "how to book this hotel Ah", "how the plane time so late Ah, can not choose the early", you have to do? You know how you don't do the Raiders? You said four not four cheap!

5. Don't judge people's lifestyles casually. as long as you are not someone's parents, said the following words are very annoying: other people single, said, "Single not good, you should find a", others Dink, said, "No children you will regret, quickly gave birth to a ah"; others stay in small cities, say "big cities have the opportunity to stay in small place", With all due respect, it's none of your business. There is no standard answer to lifestyle. I very much agree with the words of the moon, the so-called success is in their own way through life. Everyone has the right to choose their own way of life, not to impose your values on others.

6. Do not assuming, do things when others do. when driving, sitting in the passenger seat jutting forced jutting, said what "hurriedly change Road", "don't that silly force ah", "I said this road block it, you just don't listen to", all kinds of guide others drive, the whole way to tell the person, is the devil possessed! national legislation should be called on to prohibit the blind when others are driving, unless you are a driving instructor. There is the kind of you make a meal, he is in the side pointing point, ah, do not put salt now ah, oh, you put too much water ... Since you choose to let others do, respect each other, trust each other, otherwise, you can go on Ah!

7. You ask, others give a vague answer, do not cross-examine. in particular, the sensitive question, about the other's age, income, should not be asked, some people not only ask, but also inquisitive, is simply rude. My friend met a very good, ran to ask her how much salary, she said, OK. The other side said, what's the line? She said, not too fixed, see performance ... Bricks the other side, how much you can get the highest? She really wants to pounder ... Also, sometimes the problem is normal, but the other side may have hidden things, for example, your parents in the hometown Ah, people answer vague, may parents divorced, may be one of the death, anyway you do not cross-examine. In addition, on-line chatting, when the other party has started back to "haha", "ah", or only expression, it means that they do not want to talk, hurriedly say goodbye.

8. Try to avoid each other's pain points when speaking about your situation. when others lose their jobs, it's not appropriate for you to talk about how well your company's benefits are, and when someone is lovelorn, you tell your boyfriend how thoughtful and loyal the dog is. Everyone has to fall into the low time, frustrated when it is not very likely to want to hear how cool others, take care of other people's emotions. You can talk about some common topics, star gossip, food, movies. Respecting each other's present state of life is also a kind of care.

9. Do not casually spit on each other related to everything, including constellations, universities, majors, cities and so on. Spit Groove is the most need to master the sense of propriety, do not think that every time you spit groove is very humorous. There is an intern is Beijing University of Physical Education, others think humorous evaluation of a sentence, "Ouch, Sports University is what university Ah", she silently pull each other black. My friend is Shanghai people, every time there will be some two forces come up and say, "Wow, you Shanghai men are quite petty ..." there is a lack of common sense of the question, but also very annoying, such as my Inner Mongolia's friends are always asked, "Do you live in a yurt?" Do you go horseback riding? "That's enough." And when you said it was northeast, someone said, come and sing me a Errenzhuan. This! Some! Words One! Point! Also No! Yes! Interesting! He can spit out his own groove about each other, but you can't. It's rude of you to comment. In the same vein, it is impolite to mock others ' choices and ridicule others ' tastes.

10. Do not say "I am for your own good" when you exhort others. " Flower said" There is a special discussion of "I am for your good" is not nonsense, because that episode I fell in love with Ethan. Ethan said, to be a kind person, good to others, this is great, but do not have to prove your kindness, time will naturally prove. Many people think that "I am for your good" is well-known, honestly, I think to the people around the suggestion, the direct analysis of the pros and cons on the good, add "I am for You", there are three disadvantages, the first, so that the other side is very difficult to oppose you, appear that they are not sensible; You deprive the other person of the right to try wrong. Everyone is an example, no theory is inevitable. Lio Yimei said, I like to spend this life in a trial and error way. Yes, if every step of life is right, it's boring.

11. Take a photo with a person, if you want to put on social networks, be sure to ask the other party to agree. This is really extremely extremely important!!!! First of all, do not capture others, in this solemn appeal, please state legislation to prohibit the capture of others! Especially our ugly force, the snapshot is magnified our ugly. in particular, the kind of snapshot of others, not PS, do not greet you, sent to the circle of friends, should be sentenced to three years! think of Ah, so our ugly photos may be I have a crush on the people see, by our ex-boyfriend saw, by our present male God See, oh leak, good want to die Ah! The plot is even worse, the other party clearly made us very ugly, but also said, "See how good you look at me", this sentence is too hurtful. the subtext is that we are more than a play, right, real people are more ugly, I'm going to die a dead OK? Promise me to put my Yizhao PS, OK? There is the kind of photo shoot, only p himself, no matter what we were at that time, not to say hello to the online, God forbid ah.

12. Do not casually put the two friends do not know, about to eat together or party, it is easy to embarrass. Two friends are two circles, two worlds, each other different topics. laugh a little different, not a conspiracy. The stain is different, but it is not a conspiracy. and you have to take care of two people's mood at the same time, it is easy to forgotten how. For example, a dial is your colleague, a set is your college classmates, colleagues are generally spit groove boss Ah, talk about office gossip, classmates are generally catch up, talk about the students gossip, who likes who what, two people without common language, will be collective embarrassing cancer ah.

13. Even if you don't like a thing, don't complain openly. there was a friend dinner, a boy brought a girlfriend, that was the farm food, the environment is relatively humble, but things are quite delicious, but the girl did not eat a few, began to complain, "terrible death, which is for people to eat ah", and then she threw the chopsticks, and then broken read. Originally we were particularly hungry that day, eat very happy, the atmosphere was completely destroyed by her, and she said it is terrible, we are embarrassed to eat special eat, it seems that we have not eaten a good thing in life. I am such a foodie, the "admit oneself is not human" the great pressure to continue to eat, I am how determined ah. As I said, negative energy is really like a black hole that sucks all the good emotions around you.

14. Don't think it's your business to put your face on, and it will spoil everyone. my colleague's good friend's birthday, her boyfriend to coax her happy, sent her a bunch of blue roses, thought she would be very happy, the results of her in front of all the friends, the spot black face, because they just together soon, the boyfriend does not know she is a key force, a bunch of roses better hundreds of pieces, anger. The whole night turned out to be her black-and-black. Observe the Convention, everyone looked at each other, overwhelmed. Some people will say, I am in a bad mood, I can not reveal it? Yes, because you reveal, is a kind of emotional pollution ah, will make everyone embarrassed happy ah.

15. Do not be too enthusiastic, it will be uncomfortable to do well. Some people are particularly enthusiastic, see the first side of the lead as a confidant, this stay in the verbal also good, terrible is body language too close, come up on arm arms Ah, hug ah, pull each other's hands ah, talking when pat you ah ... Not everyone will resent it, but there are people who don't like it, and they need to keep their boundaries with the rest of the body. Especially in the summer is very hot ah, the body is very sticky, a lot of sweat ah, our relationship and our body distance is not in tune.

In fact, there is no sense of propriety, not depending on how you feel, but depending on the feelings of each other. It may be a normal topic for you, and the other person sounds uncomfortable. Each person's topic scale is different. For example, not everyone can accept dirty jokes. And everyone's judgment on the extent of dirty jokes is also different. Although I think dirty girl is very cute, but not everyone think so. think about each other's feelings, know enough. the last thing to say is that the most annoying people say, "I this person speak straight, you do not mind ah", you know you speak straight, why not change? Also have the nerve to ask other people not to mind, what should be accustomed to you? writer Retrieved wrote a small story, said the group, everyone in the groove, said why the society so hypocritical? Why don't you advocate telling the truth? Most despise those who have the words not directly said people, not sincere. suddenly someone came up and said, "You're a brain cripple." Other people angry, how do you curse? Why are you talking like that? The other side said, I think you are brain remnants, I will say, then you think I am sincere, or not well-bred? say others, feel that they are forthright, when others say, they feel that others have no upbringing-in the final analysis, but selfish, only to map their own cool. or that sentence, the so-called EQ High, is to put others at heart.

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The so-called emotional quotient, is to have a sense of propriety