Emperor Wu not only needs make contributions dong Zhongshu, Ji-ji, weiqing, but also need to make him happy all day Oriental Shuo

Emperor once talents: Weiqing open Xinjiang expand Soil, Huo disease defeating, Ji Dim heart Worry, Zhang Tang impose severe punishments. Only one person, difficult to define: he bellyful but not a few words abstruse, he licentious and abhorrence, the emperor to his obedience, courtiers eyes he is insignificant. Who is he? Is it genius or clown? Is it the king of Comedy or the Sad and the holy?

This incredible figure is the Oriental Shuo. At that time society, no one can understand him, modern value pluralism, but there is a word difference can be compared: alternative.

The word "alternative" is good. First of all, it's not a mixed. We want to talk about how the Orient Shuo is different, for what is different, as he is not right, good, want to imitate, a matter of opinion. Secondly, literally, "alternative" is the "category", since the "class", we have to jump out of all kinds of classical or modern rules and regulations to see him.

What is the Oriental Shuo's ability to "alternative" to the end?

Fame salary a bear to pick

First, job hunting.

Emperor Han likes to "audition". Do you remember the Zhang Qian of the western region? He just borrowed a "audition" to become Ambassador Plenipotentiary. "Audition", is "no threshold to choose talent." "The sea Blows" The nature is "blows the bull in the Wind".

After the succession of Hans, the first-Yu Jianyuan (top 140) ordered their, demanding a wide range of Chang. This "audition" activities, the Quartet to say the words and losses from the title of Yuzi to thousands of people, unprecedented. And once selected, to Butz, informal generational conferred on the office, the treatment is generous.

Sure enough, "audition" in the Emperor of the two big treasure.

The first treasure is Dong Zhongshu. Dong Zhongshu is a master of the Ram faction "Spring and Autumn", his "Heaven and Man" is based on the Confucian theory, the introduction of yin and Yang Five Elements theory, built "heaven and Man in One" "Unification" ideology, brilliant, thoughtful thinking, and put forward a series of governance strategies. Therefore, Dong Zhongshu's selection is the emperor, he is brief encounter to him.

The second treasure is the Oriental Shuo. This "audition" is only more than the article, not the talent, is not the greatest strength of the Oriental Shuo. But he can still stand out among thousands of people.

What makes Dynasty the Emperor "Crush"? Dongfang Shuo's Way Is "the sea Blows".

and see how the Oriental Shuo blew it--

Grass people Oriental Shuo, parents premature death, by elder brother sister-in-breeding. 12-year-old reading, three winter to read the history and literature is enough. At the same time, he studied fencing, 16 studies, "The book", and read 220,000 words. 19-year-old learned the art of war, also read 220,000 words. Now I am 22 years old, height nine feet three (two meters more). The eyes were shining like pearls, teeth as neat and white as a shell, and Meng (ancient patriotic Warriors) of the Yong, Qing bogey (the people known as agile before the Qin dynasty) of the agile, Baoshu (Qi doctor, and Guan Zhong cent wealth, to get their few) of the integrity, Sheng (pre-Qin names, and girlfriends about under the bridge, friends not to, the river Rose, Sheng stick be drowned) of integrity. I am workboats, endowed, merited be the minister of the Emperor!

Oriental Shuo This personal resume, "historical records" evaluation of "diction, high self-praise." However, he was a surprise, head start, Emperor Han remember the "Oriental Shuo" These three words, and great praise (Wei).

If Dong Zhongshu's "Heaven and Man Three" is a tonic pill, Lee Gall, Oriental Shuo This article is a bottle of chili sauce, an appetizer to wake up the brain. Mr. Oriental's alternative goes without saying: one is to not talk about governing the country, the second is styled. From beginning to end, there is no theory of latitude and longitude.

However, the Emperor Leng was deeply attracted by the Orient Shuo, regarded as wizards. However, the emperor is very measured, after all, it is only "high self-praise" of the little, did not propose any way of administering the country. Compared to Dong Zhongshu, the Orient Shuo is of course not on the same heavyweight level. Emperor Han Dong Zhongshu is a three-way, and to the Orient Shuo only gave a to be the "bus" department (is in the "bus department" in this office waiting for the emperor's Dahir, in fact, is a subordinate consultant) treatment. Compared to the same grade Dong Zhongshu, Shusun, the eastern Shuo status is low, the treatment is poor, usually also rare to see the emperor (make the bus, Bong Lu thin, not the province see).

The first appearance of the Orient Shuo is really surprising. Emperor Once, words presumptuous not only oriental Shuo a person, Ji Dim also often make Emperor laugh and cry. But the classics because they can not speak, only a rude speech, and the East Shuo this sea-blown, the wind, lay out the analogy, but also basic sense, if not "Wang Po sell melon", also called a beautiful article. He is intended to focus on the reading, aesthetic fatigue of the emperor to create a sensory shock. Oriental Shuo's "alternative" reveals a cunning of the Qi!

Second, promotion.

Dongfang Shuo is not a well-behaved scholar, his body is not only full of deceitful qi, but also a humorous wind.

Dongfang Shuo was just waiting for the "bus" was very excited. However, a long time (long time), the Orient Shuo whispered. See Dong Zhongshu, SHUSUN official habitat eminent, the east classmate or a small "bus" to the decree, no right no profit, with heaven in the Bi wen, just a decoration, said drying up. What to do? Do you want to have a "big trouble"? It's a dead end. Dongfang Shuo No matter 3,721, no one promoted themselves, they promoted themselves!

Oriental Shuo reasoning, from "Bute Horse temperature" start. He looked for the emperor to feed the horse's dwarf, like thunder to them: "The emperor said that you do not have the strength of farming, officials can not govern the people, war and not brave, a little useless, but also in vain to consume the country's food; prepare to kill all of you who eat white drink!

The gnomes were frightened and cried out, begging him to save the shot. Dongfang Shuo thought a thought, said: If the emperor passed here, you kneel down for mercy, may be a bit of a role.

After a while, Emperor Han passed from here, the dwarf uniform, a mass of kneeling a large, sobbing, shouting, "The Emperor Shangrao life." The emperor was baffled. The dwarf said: "The emperor said that he will kill all of us!" When he heard the emperor, he knew it was the Orient's mischief, and questioned him: "You scared the midgets to death, why?"

The Oriental Shuo righteously said: Those midgets but three feet, salary is a bag of rice and 240 money. My height is nine feet three, salary is also a bag of rice and 240 money. They eat belly to burst, but I am hungry before the heart stick back. If your Majesty thinks my eloquence is useful, let me have a full meal first. If I feel useless, please immediately remove, also good for Changan save a few meters. A listen to the emperor, overjoyed, immediately let the East Shuo from the "bus" to the golden Horse door to the king, so that the East Shuo income increased, and emperor contact opportunities are also significantly more.

This is the most popular "Chang ' an cable" story.

Oriental Shuo borrowed midgets and their height disparity, but enjoy the same salary, intimidation dwarf, express dissatisfaction. This contrast is very comic, Dongfang Shuo did not want to official, two did not ask to fill the belly, easy witty, speech properly, so provoked Han Wu laughed, in laughter dissolved in the Oriental Shuo "spoof" dissatisfaction.

Since then, the courage of this oriental shuo more and more big! Last oneself a person "sea blows", this back more place, find a bunch of mass actors to Mi Mi to pay! Is he never afraid to reflect? It's not. Dongfang Shuo also in front of Wenwubaiguan deep review. What is the status of the "East Way" review?

Thirdly, the review.

There was a year of dog (day of worship), Emperor ordered their the minister of fresh Meat. The ministers came to the palace early and waited until the sun went west, and the officials who presided over the meat did not come. The big guys are waiting. Dongfang Shuo is not so good at self-restraint, pull out the knife to cut meat. While cutting aside, said: "I'm sorry, today's heat wave people, I first take a step!" Said, put a large piece of meat in the bosom, swagger to go. The presence of the minister stunned, watched the oriental Shuo the meat swept away.

The second Heaven, presided over the meat of the officials will be the oriental Shuo arbitrarily cut meat to the emperor of Han Dynasty. Emperor Han asked: Why don't you divide the meat officers and cut off the meat? Orient Shuo immediately took off the hat Qingzui. Emperor Han pretended to be angry, and said with a straight face: "Sir, get up, do a self-criticism in public, I will not be guilty." The Orient Shuo Yi listens, the mouth is coming: Dongfang Shuo Fang Shuo, not wait for the emperor to reward, you take away the gift without permission, is very rude extremely! How magnificent it is to draw a sword and cut meat! Only cut a small piece, how clean! Do not eat, all bring to the wife, really love wife model! (The Shuo come, the Shuo, to be given not to be, what rude also, sword cut meat, one He Zhong also, cut not much, and what cheap also: return to fine June, and He Ren also! ）

Oriental Shuo Voice has not fallen, the emperor has smiled bent waist.

Emperor Wu also rewarded the Oriental Shuo a stone wine and 100 pounds of meat, let him go home to his wife.

Where is this self-criticism? Totally in boast! But Emperor ate his suit. Chodo solemn, the Bai panic, for Bo long Ye Yi: Shusun pandering, Zhang Tang fondly; only the Oriental Shuo dares to shake the lip of the tongue, make a parody, at all. For he knew that the emperor was in good graces and that he was in his hands.

Oriental Shuo's funny talent is the pinnacle. But the most important future of Oriental Shuo is his "wisdom saint" image. This is the next story.

Wave Knowledge for Wealth

Four, consultation.

Oriental Shuo Throne The story of the first in the "historical records • Slip (gǔ, ancient) biographies" in the Shaosun of the supplementary transmission. Originally, "historical records" since the spread, has been for its complement, among them, the most famous is the Shaosun of the transfer. "Historical records" of the "Oriental Shuo Zhuan" is Shaosun to fill.

According to "historical records" Shaosun The record: One day, Chang ' an building of the palace ran out a monster, the shape resembles elk. News to the palace, alarmed the emperor, also want to see this uninvited visitor, from where, why come? Emperor remembered the Orient Shuo, immediately zoonosis called Mr. East to Palm eyes.

The Orient Shuo looked after, confidently said: I know what it is, but, you must give me wine, food, let me eat a meal before said. Emperor Wudi immediately agreed. Dongfang Shuo drank wine, after eating rice, and did not immediately answer, and the emperor said: There is a place, there are gong, fish stools, Pu Wei, add up several hectares, please your Majesty to give me this piece of place, I will answer your question. Oriental Shuo, Emperor Jihuo. Helpless, had to immediately zoonosis: can reward you. The Orient Shuo, Shuo Yue: I know, is willing to give wine Liang Rice 飱 minister, Minister is a word. Edict: But. has been 飱, but also said: some of the public fields in the Pond Po Reed number is, your Majesty to give the Minister, Minister Shuo is a word. Edict: But. Oriental Shuo satiated, and won the Emperor reward, half a life, this just leisurely said: this thing called "Zou (Zōu, Zou) teeth." It's full of teeth, lined up like Zou, so it's called "Zou Teeth." If someone in the distance came to their oaths Han, "zou Teeth" will appear in advance.

More than a year later, Hun Hun Evil King did lead 100,000 of the public came to their oaths, Emperor rewarded again Oriental Shuo.

Originally, as courtiers, the emperor has the will, should immediately throne, not delay, otherwise is anti-decree. But Dongfang Shuo Zisi, go his own way, to eat to drink, to Tian-an, contented, just talked.

The Orient Shuo is indeed clever, his wisdom and knowledge is to the emperor to pay the capital of the treatment. The praise of "wisdom Saint" does not seem to be the wave of fame. Of course, this can also be seen in the reality and alternative Oriental Shuo. He really knows what is called the Emperor and what is worth. June Monarch father son son, which has so tender? To pay, to sub-property, is the emperor a word. Only you can work for the emperor, the emperor can reward you, you can get value only if it has use value.

The Oriental Shuo is comfortable, with knowledge for wealth, showing his disdain for Confucian "gentleman" unique personality.

In addition, from beginning to finish, we found that the biggest alternative to the Orient Shuo is to dare.

Met the emperor consulted, the courtiers are generally respectful, only answer the question of the portion, who dares at this juncture more vigor, play big? Oriental Shuo Dare!

Why is Dongfang Shuo so daring?

One is the Orient Shuo fully grasp the answer to the emperor's doubts;

The second is the Oriental Shuo fully capable in the emperor when angry, instantly let it turn to anger for laughter.

Grasp the emperor's psychology, lost no chance to give up, for me to use, so that the eastern Shuo in the emperor's many allele unique, intelligence is clearly higher than a smart. But on the status, he seems to be full-time to entertain the emperor, like a "gifted", insignificant.

Since already bear the greasy and disrespectful reputation, Orient Shuo more reckless, instant gratification. This "wife model" of the marriage concept is also shocking.

The Sanctuary of the church

Five, marriage.

"Historical records" record: Take young women in Chang ' An, a good woman, the rate of one-year-old women to abandon, but also to take women. The money is given to the woman.

Oriental Shuo Wife has three iron law: one is to marry the capital Changan woman, two is to marry a little beauty (good woman, young woman), three is a year a change. The emperor rewarded his money, he used to pass the old beauty, marry new beauty.

Courtiers he this set, all said the East Shuo is "madman". The emperor said: if the Oriental Shuo does not have these problems, who can catch up with him? (mainly about the half-cry of the Mad Men.) The most famous Yue: Make the Shuo in the matter of inaction, is a traveler, if you can and the Ann? ）

In fact, the feudal society of men even if the harem groups, others can not say a word is not. Tired of being able to keep them at home, no need to divorce. Oriental Shuo Different, he would like to put love a way out, it seems this "prodigal son" or know Lianxiangxiyu.

Six, won the prize.

The way to get the emperor's reward is very different from that of others.

The emperor gave dinner, and some ministers even retire at home in the old age, also bent waist, low head, chewing slowly, respectful, and trepidation.

The Oriental Shuo does not have so many rules! In front of the emperor's face, devoured, regardless of eating. After eating, leftovers to throw a pity, the Orient Shuo took off clothes, the oil of meat pocket up, carry on walk. Therefore, most of the time Oriental Shuo's clothes are filthy, others cold tearful, he also indifferent. (When the food was given before, the meal was done, and the rest of the flesh was taken, and the garments were soiled.) Some people think that packaging is the Chinese people learn from foreigners; in fact, the first person to pack in Chinese history is the Oriental New Moon.

The Emperor to reward silk silk, oriental Shuo to receive, take off, never humility. And the emperor reward these silk silk, oriental Shuo all used to marry beauty.

Oriental Shuo so alternative, but still won Emperor Love, inevitably attract colleagues envy. To deal with jealousy, Oriental Shuo also has strange strokes.

VII, was jealous.

One day, Emperor Han played in the palace, he put a gecko under the basin let ministers guess what, ministers can not guess. Oriental Shuo said: It is a dragon bar, it has no horns, said it is a snake bar, but has feet, can climb on the wall, this is not a gecko, is a lizard. The emperor said: Guess well. He was rewarded with 10 silk silks. Then let him guess the other things, the result of the Oriental Shuo is repeatedly guessed, got a lot of reward.

Emperor Another pet minister Guoshe people not convinced, shouting: Oriental Shuo is the right, not guess, I find something to let him guess, if he guessed I would rather get 100 big plates, he guessed not to please the Emperor appreciate my silk silk. Guoshe in the tree to find a long bacteria cheese leaves let Orient shuo guess, oriental Shuo answered and answer. The Han Emperor immediately Guoshe people 100 large plates, Guoshe people eat grievances.

Oriental Shuo See Guoshe people beaten, just stand idly by, cynical.

Guoshe people still not convinced, and out a riddle, Orient Shuo again guessed out. The people sigh with regret, Oriental Shuo is no longer insolent.

After this riddle, the ministers of the East Shuo all admire the pleasantly surprised, Emperor Han is also very happy, promote the East Shuo Ren often vice minister.

But the last, an alternative to get away from the spectrum of things, let Dongfang Shuo nonofficeholding wield.

What's the matter?

Once, Dongfang Shuo drunk wine, unexpectedly in the emperor's Chodo sprinkled a bubble urine (first, the moon tasted drunk into the temple, the Small relic temple); This time, the emperor was really fire, ordered the eastern Shuo's official withdrew, only to leave him to the decree Huan (impeach disrespect, there is not commoners, to be the Huan department).

Someone asked Dongfang Shuo: People think you are a madman, the brain is wrong, is this it?

Oriental Shuo said: "I am just a man in the court of the Masquerade." The Ancients to the mountain masquerade, I am different, I am a masquerade. (Shuo Yue: such as the Shuo, so-called masquerade in the court between the people also.) The ancient man was a sanctuary in the mountains. ）

According to the records of the historian, in a banquet, oriental Shuo Impromptu made a song: Lu Shen in vulgar, masquerade golden horse door, the palace can masquerade body, why the mountains, Artemisia lu under.

It means:

Drifting in the secular world,

The sanctuary in the palace,

The palace can also masquerade,

Why should I live in a mountain hut?

This song is Oriental Shuo "when the seat, wine, according to the song Yue", So, after the Ming and Qing dynasties anthology of ancient poems called the song "according to the song."

Oriental Shuo's "Masquerade in the court", to the Jin Dynasty Wang Kangyu "anti-recruit Hidden poetry", interpreted as "small faint tomb tau, big Faint asaichi"; Bai Juyi in the "hidden" poem, and put forward the concept of "implicit". In this way, there is a "small faint in the wild, in the faint in the city, the big faint in the DPRK," said.

To rely on the surrounding environment to forget the world, this is small hidden, hiding in the marketplace, is the hidden, hidden in the opposition, is the big hidden.

From entering the career, to with the Emperor, Oriental Shuo always alternative, the reason is that he never saw Chodo is sacred, he is not with the heart of reverence to classroom, but to Chodo as a place of seclusion, with a way of ridicule, and the supremacy of the emperor.

Since Chodo is the place of seclusion, the Orient Shuo only wants to live freely, live happily, live as he pleases, and live in real life.

But the emperor is not a charity, why once tolerated his alternative?

The answer is only one: happy!

Dongfang Shuo is not Dong Zhongshu, "Heaven and Man Three strategies" to answer so many heavy problems; Dongfang Shuo is not a sink, you do not wear a good hat he will pick you not, oriental Shuo whatever do all make the Emperor feel happy! He wrote a cover letter, and Hans saw straight music; he was more than a dwarf, only for a raise; Such a person, Emperor Han why not? Emperor Wu not only needs make contributions dong Zhongshu, Ji-ji, weiqing, but also need to make him happy all day Oriental Shuo.

Although we can not use the existing values to understand the Oriental Shuo, but still can't help to ask: Oriental Shuo really "hidden in the DPRK"? Which of his words did not speak to the emperor's veins? Did he come out with a laden of deceit? What a strange smell of his potty-bathing? If the officialdom more "hypocrite", then, the Orient Shuo more like a "pseudo-villain." Emperor is happy, can oriental Shuo happy? He is full of poetry, will willingly make a clown? He was so arduous that he went into the DPRK as an official.

Emperor Wu not only needs make contributions dong Zhongshu, Ji-ji, weiqing, but also need to make him happy all day Oriental Shuo