Flirting with customers"

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• 1. Radar Reconnaissance
• 2. Determine the target
• 4. Move back.
• 5. Open your heart
• 6. Dance
• 7. Actual
• 8. Enjoy

There are courses around the world to teach people how to flirt. A German university even asks its IT engineers to take flirting courses-not to attract partners, but to learn how to communicate more effectively at work. At first glance, it seems a little "Frivolous", but here flirting means establishing connections with others, and communication is the key to good communication. That is exactly the first principle of the agile declaration:Human and communication over processes and tools.

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Talented Agile Project managers know how to establish connections to improve understanding-Requirements for, survive the crisis or solve unreasonable requirements in a demand phrase, and ultimately deliver the right finished products faster. This article explores how flirting techniques are used in business environments to inspire us to create stronger connections with our customers and better understand them.

What is flirting and what can we learn from it?

When talking about "flirting", what we say is not "It looks good, but it has no serious purpose." Although the Webster dictionary is defined in this way. What we are talking about is truly involved in the process. In this sense, flirting should be better defined as establishing a connection with people-or better: through each communication, people feel valued.

Surprisingly, from a business perspective, we have a lot to learn from flirting. You can use the same method of "One night on Friday" to get a better understanding of the work environment. What I'm talking about is not an office relationship, but it just helps you build connections faster, so as to transition from the "know that you want to establish connections with others" phase to the "mutual desire to work together" phase. An important learning point is how to develop those relationships that make it easier for you to work together, more efficient, and more interesting. A natural flirting person will ask a question, really listen to the response, and then take action with the person he is in contact. Agile projects are built around such excellent communication.

My partner Ole Jepsen and I found that there are eight steps to establish contact with the customer to improve communication and create business value. Flirting with your customers can create a very good relationship, which will make the project a significant success.

Eight Steps 1. Radar Reconnaissance

It is important to acknowledge contact with customers. Remember, you want to establish a connection.

When going out, some people always enable their "radar", while others do not. If you want to enter a romantic or business scenario, you need to know who is next to you and who you need to contact. Acknowledge youWantYou can create a contact to achieve this goal, because it is the first step to establish a relationship and trust, and in all agile projects, the relationship and trust are extremely important.

This step sounds simple. But believe me, this is not the case. You need to be open-minded about creating connections, which requires confidence and awareness. Confidence comes from the inner: Know yourself and what you are good. If you do not always have a good feeling, you can use the following methods to improve your self-confidence level: exercise every day, wear a clean shirt, take some breath fresh in your mouth, practice your opening remarks, and smile. Just like preparing a person-introduced appointment. Don't change yourself, just make you better-that will increase your self-confidence.

As for consciousness ...... I just came back from the agile 2009 Conference, where I spent nearly half an hour talking to people who sold agile tools. The next morning, the two sales staff passed me by, but did not realize the existence of me or any other people around me (most of them are participants-potential customers ). They just walked over and looked dull and indifferent to what happened around them. They didn't mean it, but they did lose the chance to establish a contact.

2. Determine the target

Find the person with power in the Organization. Decide who you want to contact.

The next step is to find out who you need to contact. If you need more details about the needs of multiple users, contacting the business customers will make it easier for you to obtain relevant information. Create a contact to identify what you want to achieve. Do you want to know more about the project? Or want to deliver in shorter iterations? Or do you want to vent your dissatisfaction at work? The purpose of the contact determines the target of the contact.

Sometimes the specified user representative does not really understand the project, or has the right to successfully help the project. As the Agile Project Supervisor, you need to find out who really needs to contact and then do it. Otherwise, they may come out only when all decisions are made and the product is under development. If they are strong enough, they will destroy the value you just created.

3. Forward

Demonstrate and prove your interest in them. Show your frankness and interest.

This is your chance to open your own remarks ...... It may be like this: "I have been trying to solve this problem, and I heard that you have achieved great results in similar projects. Can you let us have a cup of coffee and talk about how you made it ?"

Like the good opening remarks in romantic scenarios, this will play a very good role. You want to make others feel noticed and valued. Do not go too far. Otherwise, it will end up having to leave, just like the low-level people who talk to all women in the bar. Make sure that you have done a lot of research when you are interested. (If necessary, Google your target) You mustSincerelyPraise those who want to further communicate.

Remember that there is a big difference between the two: one is to stop and send messages between someone's work, and the other is to stop and send messages, they also asked their daughter about the results of the swimming competition. If you are friendly and interested in others, you will be enriched with sulfur. It is easier for people to share important information with people they feel are friends.

4. Move back.

Move back and see what happened. Give the other party the opportunity to show what he is interested in.

Communication is bidirectional. You must listen and understand where the person you want to contact comes from. Because I am an American living in Denmark, I would like to quote sø ren Kierkegaard (a productive Danish Philosopher) and Abraham Lincoln (a great American President, because they all lived in the same period of time as the 18th century.

Kierkegaard said: "If a person wants to successfully lead another person to a specific place, the most important thing is that he must first carefully figure out where he is located and start from there ."

What Lincoln said is almost the same as above: "When I am ready to talk to someone, I will spend 1/3 of my time thinking about myself and what I will say, then it takes 2/3 of the time to think about him and what he will say."

The next step of communication is to present opportunities to you, and you only need to listen.

But what if he or she is not interested? At this time, there are obstacles to creating valuable relationships. The biggest obstacle is that you may have talked too much and used up all the time you can talk about. The other party has no chance to interject. Stop talking and start listening. If you need help in this area, I strongly recommend using agile analysis/9 box of problem skills. That is a good way to let the other party talk to you. You can see more on Portia Tung's blog: http://www.selfishprogramming.com/2008/08/25/heartbreak-hotel-the-best-way-to-deal-with-rejection/ (this technique was developed as a tool by Solution Selling to help people avoid rejection)

When the other party does not show any interest, as you have encountered in the bar, it is so repeat. Repeat steps 2 to 4. Determine the next person you want to communicate with to get your understanding.

5. Open your heart

Share more. Open your heart.

To truly understand the customer's needs, it is critical to have a frank, honest, and possibly in-depth conversation about the business and projects. Such a conversation only happens between people with close relationships. Share more about yourself, your concerns about project success, or anything else that helps you create this intimacy.

It is also important to acknowledge the "gray area. I believe in OLE, my partner in all such flirting transactions. This helps to spread everything on the desktop. What the customer wants from the project is different from what the supplier wants to avoid. These differences are the gray areas that ole calls. It is like buying oil lights at the market in Jerusalem: a Traveler wants to buy as many oil lights as possible with his money. The salesperson wants to use his lamp for as much money as possible. There is nothing wrong with both.

This kind of conflict of interest exists naturally in all development projects, even with "precise and complete specification descriptions", because there is always room for explanation and misunderstanding. The requirement is "rubber bands sold by rice ".

Gray areas always exist, but we usually do not discuss them publicly.

If we talk to customers early in the project, we share honest and open ideas with customers, thus, the customer may do the same thing-or even admit that they often have more requirements than they really want, because he knows that all his requirements may not be met.

If you are Frank, you are more likely to create an equal and honest atmosphere. People will respond openly. However, sharing with others is risky. Frankness means you are more vulnerable. But if you are willing to take this risk, you will show yourself to others to show your trust-in most cases, you will get trust in return. These trust-based relationships will create value in your organization, because they will allow you to get the right information faster and publish the right products faster.

Improving the richness of communication will increase understanding and business value.

6. Dance

Relax with customers and have fun.

Strong relationships are multidimensional. If you want to know how a person looks more relaxed and better, you need to ask him out to have fun! We joke that this is called dancing because you have had a drink in the bar and shared some experience. It's time to go to the center of the dance floor. Fun is indeed purposeful.

It's easy to spend some time out of the office so that your team can go to the bar with customers. Don't sit down. You have to go around and communicate with people you want to communicate. Your entertainment activities should improve your communication opportunities. But if you choose a bullet game or go to the shooting range, the opposite will happen. Even bowling will impede the conversation, because it is time for you to play when you first want to communicate. You cannot communicate within 30 seconds of each round.

If you are using chess games, art courses, or any one-to-one activities, you will create a contact. You will see his other side, which will enrich the connections between you.

7. Actual

Share the crisis. People you want to contact are more practical.

Surviving the crisis together is the best way to strengthen the relationship. The key here is to survive the crisis. When two people in love have problems that both parties cannot solve, many romantic relationships break down. On the contrary, if they have overcome difficulties, love will become more indestructible. There is a kind of sentiment called "We have overcome this difficulty, so we can get through everything ". The same thing also happens in business relationships.

I still remember that a few years ago, my job was a project manager of a large public relations company. Someone gave our team two weeks to release a multi-platform program for our customers, who focused on international risk management. A week later, the customer called us and said that he was going to Paris the next day and needed the program he requested. This was really a helpless blow, which seemed impossible at the time. Anthony is an image designer in our team who is responsible for creating prototypes that our customers will demonstrate in Paris. He told me that he could not do it. I said, "We still have 20 hours before our customer Allen got on the plane. What can I do to help you complete the task ?" I jumped into the car, drove around, found everything we needed, and rushed to Anthony's home office, where we worked all night to develop products. We were almost exhausted when we finished it, but we were very proud to have done it. Anthony called me when I drove to the airport to deliver products. He thinks that what we have just done is "Nb-extreme", but he hopes that I willNever againLet him do that. However, if I do that, he knows that I will complete the task in the same trench as him. Needless to say, the customer is very happy with our results so quickly.

I can honestly convince Anthony that this is almost impossible task. Then, by maintaining a positive attitude, we will spend all our doubts together and solve the "crisis", our work is more closely linked. We have created trust in return, which creates high value for our company.

8. Enjoy

Enjoy the relationship with the customer and use the feeling of wanting to be together.

Congratulations! Now you have created a contact! This process is not so easy and pleasant. Without help, we cannot release the right products in time. You rely on others to achieve joint success. This is a mentality: If you believe that you cannot succeed by yourself, then you have reached a different realm.

Creating these relationships will really create bid values in your organization. You need to learn how to understand the nuances of your customers and their requirements. Keep in touch. Maintain it and find new ways to keep it fresh, just like all good feelings. This will make your connection more solid.

Flirting with customers is important. It helps to build interpersonal relationships that create business value. These relationships are not generated by themselves. It requires desire and commitment-in other words, it requires hard work.

View Original English text: "Flirting" with your MERs.