Before you win someone else's heart, you have to win your heart--a programmer's thinking

These two months are reading a book, "The Seven habits of outstanding teenagers", read and read every time to feel more powerful inside, so write down what is worth sharing.

One of the topics is "personal success", the main thrust of which is: Before you start winning in public life, you must first win the victory of the personal inner war, like a war, right? In fact, we are fighting an unseen battle, and we are going to fight the old me, including the bad habits of the past, the harm from the native family, and we have to fight every day from the problems of life, interpersonal relationships, physical condition, work stress, etc. Some people often lose, he passively be led by life, talking about their own hopes and wants, do not know what they want to be what kind of person, also do not believe that they can really become a brave and pursuit of the people. Some people can win, they talk about targeted plans, concepts, opportunities and meaningful events, fairness and praise.

However, in all these external and internal challenges, we must first win our own hearts.

In my own experience of failure, if you can not clearly know what you want, there will be no enthusiasm and perseverance to pursue. Even if other people can give some advice, do not listen to others completely, if he is very intelligent and mature, he can not replace your own thinking. Whether you are pursuing a girl or planning a plan, you can only be confident if you have done it yourself: that's what I want, or: it's not what I want, it's not: I want, but I'm not sure.

And the author gives a concept and six valid "deposits":

One concept is:

I feel like a bank account to myself. When I keep my promise, I make a deposit, and when I disobey myself, I withdraw from it.

Six types of deposits are:

1. Keep your promise to yourself. I suggest starting with a simple start, such as this month, "clean your own clothes every Saturday", "I'm going to get up six o'clock Tomorrow" or "review the words before English class every day of the week". On the contrary is against their promise, such as "see today should not see the video", "under the pressure of friends to play the night game", this is the withdrawal. But even if you take the money, also believe that I can save it back!

2. Make a little friendly behavior. My advice is to be smarter about doing good things and finding out what the real needs of people around you are.

3. Be tolerant of yourself. Houston Whitney sings "Learning to Love yourself, It's the greatest Loves of all", loves oneself, is the world's greatest affection. It means giving yourself the grace and time to grow, to act positively and to believe that your talents are no worse than others, to wait patiently until one day, and the change happens unconsciously. It also means laughing at what you've done, learning to laugh at yourself, not being too important to yourself, that you and I are not at the center of the universe, and who will turn the Earth less.

4. Be honest and behave. The advantage of showing our false side to people is that we are safe and respectful for the time being, and the downside is that sooner or later we will be out of it. To be the first version of yourself, not someone else's piracy.

There are two other kinds of time to write. I want to say that some people around me, including I have a misunderstanding, feel as if only for others to give is good, always want to do something for others, but less attention to their own heart. But when we feel depressed and helpless, it is our heart that reminds us: you need to stop to ask yourself, I am going the way, is it my own choice?

As a programmer, am I busy with bugs every day and don't know where my technical expertise is? Is there a decade of experience, or is it a ten-year repetition of one year's experience? You and I do not want to rush flash time, to wake up to the Siwang, where the heart of the party?

12:19AM, written in an apartment.

If you feel good, please click "Recommended" in the lower right corner.

Before you win someone else's heart, you have to win your heart--a programmer's thinking