Effective communication skills

Complete communication process: face-to-face communication is the best way to send, receive, and feedback information.

The communication process is a complete two-way communication process: the sender needs to send the information, thoughts, and emotions he wants to express to the receiver through language. When the recipient receives information, thoughts, and emotions, it will raise some questions and give feedback to the recipient, which forms a complete two-way communication process. In the process of sending, receiving and feedback, we need to pay attention to the following: how can we achieve the best communication effect.

 

Effective message sending skills

 

First, let's take a look at the transmission of information. Note that the information here includes information, thoughts, and emotions. In communication, not only information, but also thoughts and emotions are sent. When sending information, pay attention to the following issues:

 

Question 1 select a valid message sending method (how)

 

When you want to send a message at work, you must first consider how to send it. These sending methods are frequently used at work.

Think about how you often communicate with others at work? There are telephone, email, fax, and face-to-face meeting communication methods.

  

◇ Select the correct method before sending information

In the process of communication, we must first select the correct method to achieve a good communication effect, because the gap between different methods is very large. In any communication process, we send messages, thoughts, and emotions.

◇ The sending method should be selected based on the moderate degree of communication content

For example, if you send a report to your colleagues or to your superiors, it is more information communication. When we communicate with customers, more importantly, to increase the feelings and trust between you and your customers, information is secondary, and emotion is primary. Therefore, in the process of selecting a method, we should first consider whether our content is based on information or thoughts and emotions, and choose the appropriate method based on the two different contents.

Send information	Usage	Use other methods	Advantages and disadvantages
Example: MEETING	Phone number	Personal Notice	Telephone: fast and convenient; small amount of information, inaccurate information transfer; Notice: the delay is not convenient. You may not be able to find yourself. However, the information is accurate and the amount of information is large. You can simply communicate before the meeting, so that you can better communicate, understand, and make full use of the information during the meeting, make the other Party feel respected and concerned.

This section describes several common information transmission methods:

(1)Email

E-mail is an increasingly popular method ). E-mails are increasingly widely used and have become a very popular and common communication method. Now, the first thing that many employees do at work is to open the computer and check their emails. So does email belong to language communication or physical language communication? The answer is that email is a typical written language for communication.

◇ Advantages of email. A large amount of accurate information can be transmitted, and even many cartoons can be transmitted via email. When talking about a large amount of information, it is very good to use email.

◇ Deficiencies in email. A very important deficiency is that it is impossible to transmit your thoughts and emotions. When you are talking with each other about emotions, this method of email is not conducive to emotional communication. In the past, many people used telephones to communicate with their friends, but now it takes more time to communicate via email, and friends gradually become strangers. If you and your loved ones do not meet each other for a long time and use email to communicate with each other, your feelings will fade slowly after a long time. A popular saying goes: When you chat online, you don't know whether the other party is a human or a ghost.

(2)Phone number

Telephone is a traditional and common communication method. We know that telephone communication is also a form of language communication. However, the language communication includes not only what you say, but also some of your speech tone, this is also a manifestation of the body language, which can pass on certain emotions and thoughts to each other. Therefore, phone numbers contain a certain amount of information and thoughts and emotions.

◇ Comparison between telephone and email. The amount of telephone information and the amount of e-mail information, of course, the amount of telephone information will be less, and sometimes it may be less accurate, because the oral language is not as accurate as the written language. In telephone communication, the other party cannot remember too much information at once and will forget it. Therefore, telephone is an effective way to transmit short information and simple thoughts and emotions. For example, "can you hold a meeting?" or "Can you come to the office tomorrow?". It is very good to call the phone when you confirm something at work. At the same time, we also noticed that the telephone has a particularly good advantage, that is, its speed is fast and it can make a decision in a timely manner. When an emergency occurs, we first think of dialing 110 or 119 instead of sending e-mail.

(3)Meeting or face-to-face conversation

Which of the above two methods do you think is the best way to communicate? The answer is that the face-to-face approach is the best way to communicate. When possible, choose face-to-face conversation first. However, as communication devices develop rapidly, many employees choose to call or use e-mail to communicate with each other, the best way to forget is to talk face to face.

 

[Case Study]

To enhance mutual trust and emotional communication among employees, a famous company stipulates that phone calls are not allowed to communicate within 200 of the company, but face-to-face communication is only allowed, the results have very good results, and the feelings between all employees of the Company are very harmonious. At the same time, we also see that many IT companies and some website companies have excellent communication channels: e-mail, telephone, and Internet, but ignore the best communication method: interview. As a result, today's electronic communication is becoming increasingly popular, the understanding, trust, and feelings between people have been greatly reduced. Therefore, no matter whether you are a communicator or a manager, do not forget to use the interview method for communication.

 

[Advice]

The best communication method is face-to-face communication.

Question 2: when to send the message (when)

 

Select the appropriate time.

[Advice]

Appropriate communication time should be selected to fully consider the emotions of the other party.

 

Question 3 determine the information content (what)

 

Two ways to send and transmit information content: one is language and the other is body language. What do you say when you communicate with others is very important, but the information you want to transmit will be more accurate only by adding the appropriate body language. If you only pay attention to language, but do not pay attention to body language, the communication effect will be very bad. Just like every one of us will hear many slogans every day, such as: Welcome. Do you feel welcome? I seldom feel it. We accept only the information that the words "welcome" Bring us, but do not pass our customers' emotions through the body language when she calls this sentence. Therefore, when selecting specific content, we must determine what to say, what tone and actions to say. These are very important in communication.

Question 4 who should accept the information)

 

We also need to consider the following issues when sending information:

◇ Who is your information recipient?

◇ Get the attention of the recipient first

◇ Concepts of recipients

◇ Recipient's needs

◇ Recipient's emotions

 

Question 5: where to send information)

 

When sending information, you also need to consider the environment and occasions in which the information is sent to the other party.

Now the selection of venues has attracted more and more attention. In practice, many managers have increasingly realized that the environment has a great impact on the communication effect. However, in our work, especially between upper and lower levels, communication is usually conducted in the office of the higher-level supervisor. In such an environment, communication fails to achieve good results.

Key communication skills-active listening

 

After the message is sent, the recipient receives the message, that is, listening. Which of the following is more important for sending and listening? After you think calmly, you will find that listening is more important than speaking in communication. We usually listen to a lot of things that others have said, but do not listen carefully to the information actually transmitted by the other party, communication fails. Therefore, listening is an important non-verbal communication technique.

(1) Principles of listening

In the process of listening, we need to pay attention to the principles of listening:

◇ Adapt to the speaker's Style

◇ Use both eyes and ears

◇ First seek to understand others and then be understood by others

◇ Encourage others to express themselves

◇ Listen to all information

◇ Show interested in listening

(1)Listener must adapt to the speaker's style.When a person sends a message, the volume and speed of his speech are different. You should try your best to adapt to his style and receive more, more comprehensive, and more accurate information as much as possible.

(2)Listening should not only use your ears, but also your eyes.What you hear in your ears is only some information, but what you see in your eyes is that they send more thoughts and emotions to you, because this requires more body languages to pass on, therefore, listening is the work of ears and eyes.

(3)First, understand each other.In the process of listening, you must pay attention to thinking about the problem from the perspective of the other party, rather than commenting on the other party.

(4)Encourage each other.In the process of listening, I watched the other party keep their eyes on each other and nodded appropriately to show interest in listening.

(2) Four Steps for Effective listening

Four steps for listening Prepare for listening Send listener preparation Information Take positive actions during communication Understand all information of the other party

 

Step 1 standby listener

First, you give the speaker a signal that I am ready to give the speaker full attention. Secondly, you are prepared to listen to your different opinions and think about problems from the perspective of the other party.

  

Step 2 send the listener preparation Information

Normally, you will have a eye-catching conversation with the speaker before listening to the speaker, showing that you have paid full attention to the speaker. This tells the other party: I am ready, you can say. You should always use your eyes to communicate with each other.

  

Step 3 take positive actions

Positive behaviors include the frequent nod we just mentioned, encouraging the other party to speak. In the process of listening, you can also lean forward rather than backward. This is a positive attitude. This positive attitude indicates that you are willing to listen, try to listen. At the same time, the other party will send more information to you.

  

Step 4 understand all information of the other party

The purpose of listening is to understand all the information of the other party. When you are not clear or understand the communication process, you should tell the other party in time and ask the other party to repeat or explain it. This is a common mistake we make during the communication process. Therefore, you must notify the other party in time when such a situation occurs during communication.

When you are not clear, or do not understand, you should say: In the course of my speech, you can raise your hand to ask questions if you have any questions. This proves that he knows how to say, listen, and ask in the process of communication. You must be quiet. Do not ask questions. That is not a good communication.

The communication process is a two-way loop: sending, listening, and feedback.

(3) five levels of listening

In the process of communication and listening, because each of us has different listening skills, it seems that normal listening is divided into five different levels of listening effect.

 

Five levels of listening Hear nothing Pretend to listen Selective listening Dedicated listening Place yourself in listening

 

1Hear nothing

To put it simply, you can say that you do not listen to it with any effort.

Let's recall, when will it happen during normal work? What should I do if I hear nothing?

What you hear is that you do not make any effort. You can see from his body language that his eyes are not communicating with you. He may look around and his body may fall to the other side. When you hear it, it means that there is no good result. Of course, there is no possibility of reaching an agreement.

 

2Pretend to listen

Pretending to listen is to make the listener look visible to the other party. Of course, pretending to listen is not listening attentively. At work, you often pretend to listen. For example, when you talk to a customer, the customer has another idea. Out of courtesy, he pretends to listen, in fact, he did not listen at all. In the process of communication between the upper and lower levels, the lower level is afraid of the power of the higher level. Therefore, he is not actually listening. A person who pretends to listen is trying to listen. His body is leaning forward and even holding his chin with his hand. In fact, he does not listen.

 

3Selective listening

Selective listening is to listen to only part of the content, and tends to listen to the content you want or want to hear. This is not a good listener.

 

4Dedicated listening

Focused Listening is to listen carefully to the content of the speech and compare it with your own experiences.

 

5Place yourself in listening

It is not only listening, but also trying to understand what the speaker said. Therefore, listening to and understanding the speaker in the interests of the other party is the true and put-in-place listener. Listening in place is to understand the other party, but from the other party's perspective: Why does he say this? What kind of information, thoughts, and emotions does he say this to express? If your superiors raise your back when talking to you, it proves that he has not seriously communicated with you and is unwilling to communicate with you. Therefore, you must put yourself in listening. When the other party communicates with you, reading the table frequently also shows that he wants to end the communication quickly. You must understand the other party: is the other party in a hurry? You can make an appointment to talk about it next time. The other party will be very grateful for your understanding. This will lay the foundation for your cooperation.

Effective feedback skills

 

(1) Definition of Feedback

In the communication process, the last step is information feedback. What is feedback? Feedback is the backflow of information that both Parties expect. I will give you information, and you will also give me feedback.

Feedback is what people do. What they say is that this information aims to make behavior change or strengthen.

(2) Type of Feedback

There are two types of feedback: positive feedback and constructive feedback. Positive feedback is to commend the other party for doing well and hope that good behaviors will reappear. Constructive feedback is when someone else is not doing enough, you give him a suggestion. Please note that constructive feedback is a suggestion rather than a criticism, which is very important. Feedback is positive and constructive. Are there any negative feedback? At work, we often receive some negative feedback, saying that you are not doing well. So what is our mood in the process of receiving? The mood will be unpleasant. Negative Feedback not only does not help you after you receive it, but it has a lot of negative impact on you. Therefore, there is only positive feedback and constructive feedback, no negative feedback, and no negative feedback. In the process of communication, communication is not complete without feedback, because the information has not been returned, it is a one-way behavior. Therefore, complete communication cannot be called without feedback. Feedback is to give a suggestion to the other party to help the other party and make the work better.

In the process of feedback, we must note that some situations are not feedback: first, point out the correct or wrong information of the other party. Feedback is your advice to the other party, in order to make him do better. Second, the explanation of others' words and deeds is not feedback. For example, I understand what you mean, what you mean, and what you mean-this is not feedback, it is a kind of listening. Third, for future suggestions. The suggestions for the future and the future are not feedback. Feedback is to give the other party a suggestion on the information you just received, in order to make him do better.

The feedback is not:

◇ Positive or negative opinions on others' words and deeds

◇ Explanations of others' words and deeds

◇ Future suggestions or instructions

 

[Advice]

Never use negative cognition!

No cognition is worse than negative cognition!

Trust is the basis of communication

 

In our daily work and life, if there is a lack of trust between the two parties, the communication will certainly be ineffective and fail. When I contact my colleagues at work, some people communicate smoothly, but some people have difficulty communicating. An important factor is that you have different trust levels with different people. If there is a lack of trust, the communication effect will be poor and it is difficult to solve the problem. Trust is the basis of communication. Anyone may have said that I am good with someone in the company, and we trust and communicate with each other. How to win such trust? In the process of communication, effective body language can win others' trust in you. This lecture focuses on how to use your body language in communication to achieve better communication results.

 

[Advice]

Effective body language can win others

Five attitudes of communication

 

Five attitudes towards effective communication Forced attitude Evasive attitude Overall attitude Cooperative attitude Accommodating attitude

 

(1) Five attitudes towards effective communication

In the communication process, different people take different attitudes due to different levels of trust. If your attitude is not correct or good, the communication effect is definitely not good. In the process of communication, there are five different attitudes based on the difference between courage and cooperation. Please note that attitude determines everything. If the attitude problem is not solved, the communication effect will be poor.

  

1Forced attitude

Forced attitude, strong courage, but lack the spirit of cooperation. In work and life, there is indeed such a situation, such as parents to children, superiors to subordinates, In this forced attitude, communication is actually not easy to reach a common agreement.

  

2Evasive attitude

In communication, you do not have to make a decision or cooperate with you on your own initiative. Such an attitude is called withdrawal. He always avoids you, does not want to communicate with you, and does not want to make decisions, so he cannot get a good communication result.

 

3Accommodating attitude

Although a person with an attitude of accommodating is very courageous, he can cooperate with you very much. If you say anything, he will agree. In normal work and life, have you ever met the other party with a kind of accommodating attitude? Generally, lower-level employees tend to adopt an attitude of accommodating superiors. When talking to a lower-level employee, you should note whether his attitude is wrong or not. If yes, communication will be meaningless and no correct feedback will be given.

During the communication between parents and children, the child may say yes or better because one party has the power and the other party has no power.

 

4Overall attitude

You have a certain level of confidence, cooperation, and smoothness.

 

5Cooperative attitude

In the process of communication, cooperation requires a correct attitude: a certain level of courage to take responsibility, make decisions, and be cooperative. Such an attitude is a cooperative attitude, to generate a common protocol.

Skills for establishing a cooperative attitude

1The specific appearance of cooperation attitude

The first form of cooperation attitude is that both parties can express their concerns. You think there is a problem in this place. He also thinks that there is a problem in this place. Both parties can explain without reservation the problems they are worried about and the difficulties they have encountered. In daily work and life, is the other party willing to express their own ideas? It's like asking lower-level personnel: What do you think are the shortcomings of our department? So is he willing to say it? Only when he is a cooperative attitude can he tell all his problems. The attitude of cooperation is expressed by the willingness of both parties to express all concerns and concerns.

The second form of cooperation attitude is that both parties actively solve this problem, rather than shirking responsibility.

The third manifestation of the cooperative attitude is that the two sides jointly study the solution. Mutual research does not mean that one party tells the other party, or that one party commands the other, but that both parties work together to find a good solution to the problem.

Fourth, the appearance of a cooperative attitude. In the process of communication, we talk about behavior rather than personality.

The fifth form of cooperation attitude is the final win-win agreement between the two parties. It must be an agreement that takes into account the interests of both parties.

In fact, it is very difficult to reach a cooperative attitude during the communication process. In our daily work, we often communicate with different people. Therefore, communication can be successful only when our attitude problem is solved.

 

2Establishing a cooperative attitude between superiors and subordinates

When we met a lower-level employee, did we adopt a forced attitude? Or is it a cooperative attitude? As a company leader, it is especially important to maintain a good cooperative attitude for all participants in the communication. If the attitude of the other party is not cooperative, the expected communication effect may not be achieved. When we meet customers and suppliers, if your attitude is constantly changing, the communication effect is definitely not good, and it also makes you feel a lot of pressure in your work, because you are constantly adjusting your attitude. How to Make yourself have a good cooperative attitude is very important in communication.

 

[Advice]

Attitude determines everything!

Effective use of body language

 

(1) first impression: the decisive seven seconds

 

A good first impression will win the trust of the other party and will be willing to communicate with you in a cooperative manner. When we communicate with others, how long will it take for us to get an impression or make an accurate first impression? Scientific tests prove that when we appear in front of others, we get a first impression of you in 7 seconds. Therefore, a good first impression should be made seven seconds before the communication process.

Communication window

 

In the process of body language communication, a cycle involves two very important factors: Speaking and question behavior. This article introduces a very famous theory called "communication window ". This window shows that when we treat each other differently, that is, when we say more or ask more, it will make others have a different impression on you, affects others' trust in you.

 

1"Communication window"Divide all your information into four intervals.

◇Public Area:That is, some information you know and others know. The public area information is personal information, such as name, character, place of residence, and work unit.

◇Blind Zone:It is often about some of your shortcomings. You may not be aware of your shortcomings, but others will be able to see your shortcomings. That is, you do not know your information, but others know it. Blind Zone information, such as weakness in character or bad behaviors that you do not care about at ordinary times.

◇Hidden area:You know some information about you, but others do not. There is also a hidden area of information that others do not know, only you know. Such as conspiracy and secret.

◇Unknown zone:It's just some information about you that you don't know, and others don't know.

2Skills in using communication windows

Each person has the above four types of information. In the opinion of others, the information of each person is different.

◇ InTips for using public zones.He knows his information, and others know what kind of person we feel like? People who are good at communicating with each other and very easygoing people can easily win our trust and communicate with them in a cooperative manner. To make your public area larger, we need to talk more and ask more people to give you some suggestions and feedback. This tells us from the other side: speaking more and asking more is not only a communication technique, but also an important guarantee for others to communicate with you in a cooperative attitude. In the process of communication, we must pay attention to communication as a kind of skill. This skill is what you show in communication. If you want to win others' trust in you, you need to say more and ask more questions at the same time. These two actions mean a good communication skill.

◇ InThe use of blind spots.What kind of person is there if one person has the largest blind zone information? He is an informal and arrogant person. He has many shortcomings that others can see, but he cannot. The reason for the large blind zone is that he has too many questions and asked too few questions. He does not ask others for their feedback. Therefore, in communication, you should not only talk more but also ask more questions to avoid leading to large blind spots.

◇ InTips for using hidden areas.If a person has the largest hidden area, the information about him is often known only by himself, but not by others. This is a closed person or a mysterious person. Such a person has low trust in him. In the process of communicating with him, we may be less cooperative, because he is mysterious and closed. Why do we say that the hidden area is the largest in the eyes of others? He asked a lot, but said little. He is not good at actively telling others about his information, so if others think that you are a person with a large hidden area or someone else thinks that you are a very mysterious person, the reason is that you are talking too little.

◇ InTips for using unknown zones.The unknown zone is large, that is, the information about it. He and others do not know it. In other words, a phenomenon of the unknown zone is that he does not ask or ask, but may be a very closed person, such a very closed person does not ask or tell others about his information. Being closed may lead to a lot of opportunities for him, and a competent job will be lost. Maybe others don't know that he can do this, and he doesn't know that he can do it. We say that the competition is becoming increasingly fierce. Everyone must strive for more job opportunities and more opportunities to achieve their own business. So this unknown area is very large, it is likely to lose many opportunities. When the competition becomes more and more fierce, losing the opportunity means to lag behind or even be eliminated by society. Therefore, everyone must try to narrow down their unknown areas and take the initiative to learn about themselves through others, actively tell others what I can do.