[Reprinted] independent education for American teenagers

A blog of nanqiao has a lot of feelings.

Two of them can be shared:

"Clarify rules, clarify responsibilities, cultivate abilities, and encourage others".

Although children's education has always believed that they should cultivate self-reliance and independent thinking abilities, they did not do enough in this respect and did not dare to open it up.

For companies and students, we should be better. Responsibility and ability cultivation have always been the focus. We need to strengthen our efforts in explaining rules and encouraging more.

"Authorize or authorize".

Easy to learn.

When I read the things of the Ming Dynasty during the summer vacation last year, what impressed me most was Wang Yangming's "integration of knowledge and practice". The truth is very simple.Patterns and rules.

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Original article: http://berlinfang.blog.163.com/blog/static/1166707162010218103113247/

I have always believed that success depends on myself, and adults depend on their parents. We often talk about how American teenagers are independent, how they live and think independently. In fact, these are all derived from parental education. It's not that Americans are born different from us. I believe that we can cultivate independent and independent children.

Not long ago, I had an American friend Teresa and I talked on Skype about some observations she had taken with her children. Teresa is a single person who has adopted a child from China and lives in China. In fact, single parent often becomes the best parent. Why? In many cases, the two parents have different opinions and different methods. One is to construct a deconstruct, and the other is to construct a separate platform, which will lead to confusion in the formation of children's values. In the end, no one will listen to them, listen to the idol of fellow students. This problem does not occur to single-parent users. What is she talking about. The problem is that teacher Teresa has a nanny who is a Chinese nanny and has some disagreement with her about bringing her children. I found that these differences reflect the differences in cultural thinking between the two countries. For example, when a child is at home and put his toys and shoes in disorder, the nanny will scold him. Teresa asked me what to do. I said I was not afraid of them. I just had to clean it up. According to feedback from Teresa, I have improved a little bit than the nanny. Teresa's practice is to make the child play, play, and have fun, and then let the child clean up. She said she was surprised that such a small child had neatly packed his shoes. What I learned from her is that when the children are supposed to play, they should be responsible. Our Chinese parents tend to keep everything in their homes in full order. This prevents them from being moved, and the children will not be able to do their best. It's a bad thing, and the parents are here to clean up. Teresa is one of the few management consultants I admire (the company website). She also put her children's experiences in management. When she was developing her leadership, think that good leaders do not always feel insecure and worry that the situation is out of control (for example, when children make a mess at home). The more important thing is to clarify rules, clarify responsibilities, cultivate capabilities, and encourage more. As a parent, I believe that such a consultant understands the truth and can help an enterprise solve the fundamental problems. Most families in the United States advocate independent children to meet the challenges and opportunities of life. What do you mean when a person lives in the world and you do everything you want? children are never adults? People are always lazy. If someone gives them, they will naturally be willing to accept them. Even animals drive the little eagles out and let them hunt and fly independently. Sometimes humans don't. Why? Because my parents are afraid of this, they are not willing to let go. How did Americans who are famous for their independence receive independent education from an early age? Last weekend, we had two colleagues for dinner. One of them was a lawyer and said they were very rich. But when their children go to study abroad, they raise money on their own. Of course, one of the ways is to work, and if you have enough money to work, you can find sponsors ). A parent's job is to educate children about how to find sponsors, such as how to write letters, how to state to others, and how to write gratitude. Under the guidance of her parents, the daughter began to write a sponsorship application letter. After writing the letter, an old lady replied and raised a three-page question. Ask her what to learn, how to learn, what are the benefits of studying abroad, and so on. My colleagues' daughter, just like applying for admission to college, replied in a meticulous manner. Soon, the old lady sent 1200 yuan. All this is troublesome. The simplest way is to give money directly. However, it seems like a shortcut to "teach people to fish", but there is no way to go, and we will continue to use the detours of our lives in the future. In Chinese culture, if we plan for our children as parents, our son will take care of them when buying a house, getting married, and having children one by one. In the end, we will find that an old neighborhood is filled with complaints, is this a child problem? Of course not. This is a problem for our parents, because we didn't give the children what they needed most, such as the ability to develop a project independently, or how to say thank you. At dinner that day, another colleague spoke about his twin daughter. We asked them to come together. They didn't come. I asked why my colleagues said they were vegetarian. I asked why he was a vegetarian. He said that his daughter had watched some animal abuse education films and suffered a huge dislike of meat. So he decided to take a vegetarian diet for a year. "This year is very difficult," said my colleague's wife. Because every time you cook, you have to consider preparing for them separately. They even tried to make their parents become vegetarian together, saying it would be healthier. "In this case, have you dispelled their thoughts ?" I asked. My colleague said he didn't want to do this. "I taught them to think independently (I brought up them to think for themselves .) "In addition, this colleague is a conservative Christian, and his two daughters like Sweden's more socialist system and like Obama. However, the family is very harmonious and will not let the difference in life and concepts undermine unity. The so-called gentleman is different from each other, and the villain is not the same. This kind of independent thinking is often the most difficult for parents and the easiest thing for parents to do. As a parent, do you dare not educate your children?